"Know ye the Truth and the Truth shall set you Free!"
PTL! Thank you for wisdom LORD. Thank you for your WORD!
I thought I knew the truth. It wasn't her fault. She was a beautiful woman that was taken advantage of. Men exploited her beauty and her body and left her with a litter of unwanted children. My poor mother did the best she could. She married that pervert for me, for us. It was really our fault. If we had never been born her life would have been much better. She could have been a great actress or a great writer. Then we came along and ruined her life.
We weren't just unwanted burdens, we were BLACK! The most hideous color GOD could plague us with. We were unworthy, unwanted, no count and we were never going to amount to s***! The only reason we were so smart was because we went to white schools, sitting in classes with white children and enlightened by white teachers made us very intelligent. That wouldn't have happened if she hadn't sacrificed her life and married that black a** pervert.
That is the garbage she feed us. That is the ignorant garbage that she spewed out of her foul mouth. The garbage that my grandfather told me to ignore.
"I keep your muthaf***** a**holes open!" She would scream for hours without end.
PTL! How did I make it? Divine intervention.
The ironies are incredible. Mathy Jane, a super narcissist could never control her own life, her impulses, her lust, but demanded control over every aspect of every life that ever crossed her path.
I suffered mightily at this woman's hands. I have suffered unnecessarily. I have suffered because my mother is a creature that hates the Truth. I believe she hates GOD. She loves unrighteousness. Dear LORD deliver me.
Still unrepentant, still callous and uncaring.
I get it, she could not get it. She can not understand boundaries, laws, societal rules. She hates a GOD that would deprive her of her lust.
More than anything she hates anyone that would dare have the nerve to tell on her. You will suffer! You will pay mightily!
This old reprobate fell upon the best scam ever conceived. Do what ever you want, what ever you feel like. There is no such thing as perversion if if feels good. "If it feels good do it.": is her motto.
I blog to heal, to inform, to warn. This purging brings me no joy. I have been enlightened by this "event". Most of the people in my life are very uncaring just like my mother. That is not a criticism, it is just a fact of life. They may not be as demonic. I don't think they practice witchcraft or are predatory but they are unfeeling. I do not blame them. The ability to love and care about your fellow man is a gift from GOD. Unfortunately most of the people that I know do not know the LORD and they do not want to know the LORD. They do not want to be saved. They actually think that they don't need GOD and His protection. They are so vain they think they are super smart, that they can handle this world with their talent and drive. Living a righteous life is far from their hearts. Some of them go to church and think that they are serving GOD.
Some people are angry. How dare I air my dirty laundry? Their lives have been so wonderful with perfect parents. They live in a white bread world with no snafus, no abnormality and they are too pretty and too prefect to be bothered by someone else's pitiful life. "Why don't you get over it already! Oh my GOD...oh how pathetic!
I really don't want to hear about such. I don't have time. My life is perfect and it will always be perfect."
I have one thing to say to all doubters, scoffers, the callous and uncaring; your day is coming.
In the mean time study the Bible for yourself. You will discover that rot that my mother preaches; "Take dat to yo' grave! I wudden tell nobody! Ain't nobody gon blieve ya. Ain't gon do no good to tell...ain't gon change nuttin." is simply for her protection. She doesn't mind the deeds, its your knowing that annoys her.
Search the WORD. Learn to love genuinely. Read 2 Peter 1: 5 -8. Study it.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
Let Me tell You Something!
That was generally the first sentence a so called "Christian" started out with when they got ready to tell you off, to put you in your place. In some "black" cultures this was the unofficial announcement that you were about to get "Read". To get "read" was to get told off "sho nuff'". A reading is not just telling someone how you feel about them, it is revealing long kept secrets. When a person reads you that generally signals finality. "We are finished! I have had it! I am feed up!"
That happens in life because we are human. For what ever reason it is hard for human beings to get along , in our families, on our jobs, in our churches. A part of the reason is human selfishness. Most people are too self absorbed, too judgmental, too human, to get along perfectly. That is why we need Jesus.
It is Monday, December 27, 2010. and I am blogging and listening to old Gospel music, having old time black church in my bedroom. I am happy , I am loving it. It conjures up great memories. It reminds me that I once had a very beautiful life. I lived on a big farm out in the country and I had a wonderful loving grandfather to nurture and protect me. That life was taken from me when I was four years old.
Luckily for me my grandfather remained a very stabilizing force in my life until I was twenty eight years old.
There are two important facts that my grandfather taught me that have guided me my entire life. He taught me that time changes all things. And He taught me that man does not do what is right, man does what is convenient.
That brings us to this blog. I am blogging to heal and to hone my writing skills. I have completed the book about my life and it is a fantastic read. It chronicles a very exciting journey. The best part of my book is that the redemptive intercessionary power of our Almighty GOD is revealed throughout my life. The worse part of my book is my arch nemesis, my "mother, my birther. It is a sad book because it is totally unnecessary. My experiences have taught me that a lot of pain that people suffer is unnecessary. My only answer is that it is all in divine order,GOD is working it out and the devil can not win.
THE READING:
"Let me tell you something! No, you just shut up! Shut your lying mouth! You have never told the truth about anything in your entire life!!! I am talking EIGHTY-FIVE years! How can you live so long and be so blind and so stupid? Every problem you have you can trace back to your lying mouth!"
"Sit down! Shut Up and listen for once. You messed up and you messed up bad. You didn't just go down the wrong road. You went running head first and destroyed your life early on. Well it is one thing to destroy your own life. But why have you tried to deliberately destroy the lives of your own children? Are you really that jealous?"
"Well I am standing here looking down on you in that hole you dug for yourself. I can't pull you out. I guess GOD can get you out if you let him. But while I have you here there is some explaining that you are going to have to do before you leave."
#1 - Why are you a pathological liar?
#2 - Why are you so cruel?
#3 - Why did you orchestrate and participate in the sexual abuse of your daughter?
#4 - Why won't you tell your son who his father is?
#5 - Why do you suffer so much from envy and jealousy?
#6 - Why did you murder your own father?
#7 - Why do you insist on living a lie when everyone knows the truth?
#8 - Can you Love the LORD?
#9 - Will you repent of your sins? "
"We didn't come here to stay always dawter. It is time for all of us to pack up to get ready to go. Oh yea you got to go. We all got to go. Sooner or later you lefting here. You got to move! When the LORD gets ready you got to move."
Dear Children, continue in his word, set yourselves apart, come ye out from among them. Pray every day!
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
That happens in life because we are human. For what ever reason it is hard for human beings to get along , in our families, on our jobs, in our churches. A part of the reason is human selfishness. Most people are too self absorbed, too judgmental, too human, to get along perfectly. That is why we need Jesus.
It is Monday, December 27, 2010. and I am blogging and listening to old Gospel music, having old time black church in my bedroom. I am happy , I am loving it. It conjures up great memories. It reminds me that I once had a very beautiful life. I lived on a big farm out in the country and I had a wonderful loving grandfather to nurture and protect me. That life was taken from me when I was four years old.
Luckily for me my grandfather remained a very stabilizing force in my life until I was twenty eight years old.
There are two important facts that my grandfather taught me that have guided me my entire life. He taught me that time changes all things. And He taught me that man does not do what is right, man does what is convenient.
That brings us to this blog. I am blogging to heal and to hone my writing skills. I have completed the book about my life and it is a fantastic read. It chronicles a very exciting journey. The best part of my book is that the redemptive intercessionary power of our Almighty GOD is revealed throughout my life. The worse part of my book is my arch nemesis, my "mother, my birther. It is a sad book because it is totally unnecessary. My experiences have taught me that a lot of pain that people suffer is unnecessary. My only answer is that it is all in divine order,GOD is working it out and the devil can not win.
THE READING:
"Let me tell you something! No, you just shut up! Shut your lying mouth! You have never told the truth about anything in your entire life!!! I am talking EIGHTY-FIVE years! How can you live so long and be so blind and so stupid? Every problem you have you can trace back to your lying mouth!"
"Sit down! Shut Up and listen for once. You messed up and you messed up bad. You didn't just go down the wrong road. You went running head first and destroyed your life early on. Well it is one thing to destroy your own life. But why have you tried to deliberately destroy the lives of your own children? Are you really that jealous?"
"Well I am standing here looking down on you in that hole you dug for yourself. I can't pull you out. I guess GOD can get you out if you let him. But while I have you here there is some explaining that you are going to have to do before you leave."
#1 - Why are you a pathological liar?
#2 - Why are you so cruel?
#3 - Why did you orchestrate and participate in the sexual abuse of your daughter?
#4 - Why won't you tell your son who his father is?
#5 - Why do you suffer so much from envy and jealousy?
#6 - Why did you murder your own father?
#7 - Why do you insist on living a lie when everyone knows the truth?
#8 - Can you Love the LORD?
#9 - Will you repent of your sins? "
"We didn't come here to stay always dawter. It is time for all of us to pack up to get ready to go. Oh yea you got to go. We all got to go. Sooner or later you lefting here. You got to move! When the LORD gets ready you got to move."
Dear Children, continue in his word, set yourselves apart, come ye out from among them. Pray every day!
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Revelation 2:10
"Fear none of those things which thou shalt suffer: behold, the devil shall cast some of you into prison, that ye may be tried; and ye shall have tribulation ten days: be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life."
I was struck speechless when I read that scripture. "prison" is the perfect analogy. Not only did I suffer and languish in her prison, I was chained in a deep dark dungeon, a dark hole.
Thou he (devil) slay me, yet shall I serve the LORD!
I know you are laughing, just keep laughing, keep daring GOD to punish you. Too bad you are too ignorant to know that GOD doesn't punish you, He allows you to punish yourself.
You built your life on hatred and deceit and now that's all you have.
It is true, your cruelty is so repulsive it is incomprehensible. I will say that any one that is still bowing and scraping to you is a sniveling coward. I know I have no right to judge them. I barely escaped myself. I may never have come to the realization that you are a despicable demon without your massive assault. A greedy skank you over do everything. Your insatiable lust will not let you get enough. You are still seeking the trill of the kill. You want to smash that puppy between two bricks again. I will not be your puppy.
"For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, because what may be known of GOD is manifest in them, for GOD has shown it to them. For since the creation of the world His visible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, because, although they knew GOD, they did not Glorify Him as GOD, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible GOD into an image made like corruptible man - and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things. Therefore GOD also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves, who exchanged the truth of GOD for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. For this reason GOD gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature." Romans 1:18 - 26
"being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, MURDER, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whispers, backbiters, haters of GOD, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving, unmerciful; who, knowing the righteous judgment of GOD, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them." Romans 1: 29 - 32
That's YOU! That prophetic WORD describes and explains you perfectly.
"From such stay away!" Praise the LIVING LORD!
You shall proceed no further devil. You have been found out. Your name will rot!
To readers of this blog please know GOD will bless and protect you if you live right, if you love the LORD with all your heart and mind.
"Come ye out from among them." ; is the best I can tell you.
Thank you for my deliverance Father.
Children, stay in His WORD. Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I was struck speechless when I read that scripture. "prison" is the perfect analogy. Not only did I suffer and languish in her prison, I was chained in a deep dark dungeon, a dark hole.
Thou he (devil) slay me, yet shall I serve the LORD!
I know you are laughing, just keep laughing, keep daring GOD to punish you. Too bad you are too ignorant to know that GOD doesn't punish you, He allows you to punish yourself.
You built your life on hatred and deceit and now that's all you have.
It is true, your cruelty is so repulsive it is incomprehensible. I will say that any one that is still bowing and scraping to you is a sniveling coward. I know I have no right to judge them. I barely escaped myself. I may never have come to the realization that you are a despicable demon without your massive assault. A greedy skank you over do everything. Your insatiable lust will not let you get enough. You are still seeking the trill of the kill. You want to smash that puppy between two bricks again. I will not be your puppy.
"For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, because what may be known of GOD is manifest in them, for GOD has shown it to them. For since the creation of the world His visible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, because, although they knew GOD, they did not Glorify Him as GOD, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible GOD into an image made like corruptible man - and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things. Therefore GOD also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves, who exchanged the truth of GOD for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. For this reason GOD gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature." Romans 1:18 - 26
"being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, MURDER, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whispers, backbiters, haters of GOD, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving, unmerciful; who, knowing the righteous judgment of GOD, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them." Romans 1: 29 - 32
That's YOU! That prophetic WORD describes and explains you perfectly.
"From such stay away!" Praise the LIVING LORD!
You shall proceed no further devil. You have been found out. Your name will rot!
To readers of this blog please know GOD will bless and protect you if you live right, if you love the LORD with all your heart and mind.
"Come ye out from among them." ; is the best I can tell you.
Thank you for my deliverance Father.
Children, stay in His WORD. Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
What I Tell You In Darkness That Speak Ye In Light
PTL! You've been working it out LORD. Thank you for my deliverance. Thank you for my story. Thank you for my testimony.
*********
Mathy Jane was fierce, determined to have her way from birth. Born with fire red hair , porcelain white skin and extraordinary intelligence she was not one to be denied anything she ever wanted. If she wanted it she got it; "by hook or crook".
You can say "hook or crook" was her motto, her credo.
Something happened in her development. I can't say what, but it caused her to be totally unfeeling, uncaring. When she told you that she didn't give a damn she didn't. She would just as soon kill you as a roach.
On the flip side of that she was super sensitive. The slightest negative remark or innocent criticism of anything she did or said earned you a place in her hell.
Yea, she has her own hell. She enjoys her own made up world. I call it The World of Mathy Jane. If you were born to her it would become your prison, your tomb.
Few dared to think about escape. Who could have the nerve, the courage, the intelligence to break free? Defy her if you dare. The whole "family" would be against you in short order. Dispatched to crucify you by Her Highness, you would soon knuckle under.
One thing Mathy Jane always counted on was her money. No, she was never rich for real. She just pretended to be rich. She collected some of the trappings and trinkets of the rich. But she has been a broke ass nigga her whole life. She loves money. Her love of money is not necessarily her problem. Her problem is that she doesn't want YOU to have any. Not one red cent.
It is also true that she always had more money than all of her children, with the exception of the doctor and the little black one that she actually may love.
It was by design. You know most parents want more for their children. Their success is the parents' success. That is how it works naturally. Well, Mathy Jane is the anti-mother. The success of her children is a slap in her face. It makes her acutely ill. Nothing makes her feel better than revenge, a plot, a slander.
Minimal pain won't do. She wants you to suffer. If she thinks you have more than she thinks you deserve she will scheme on you until you are flat busted and broke.
She walked in on her son *Micky's performance. *Micky was making love to that saxophone on stage. The audience was enthralled, on fire. People dared to compare him to John Coltrane and Dexter Gordon. Mathy lost it and started her campaign of total annihilation. She was determined to see him dead. The more she tried the more he thrived and the more she hated him.
She laughs hysterically to herself: "De dumb ass nigga think it was his wife."
*********
Every word of my blog is true. Blogging is my therapy. GOD is my psychiatrist, He is my healer, my protector. GOD has always talked to me, always protected me. He built a hedge around me and saved me from one of the most despicable demons imaginable.
My answer to scoffers is; "What am seen can't be denied." I collected that prophetic true-ism while researching my master's thesis. The master's thesis that she destroyed.
It is cool, it is all in divine order. You never stopped me from doing anything I ever wanted to do. You did get in the way. Perhaps you did arrest my development. One thing for sure, your decadent stealth cruelty made me the best person any one could ever be.
I wish I could say like Jesus; "Go and sin no more.", which would mean absolutely nothing to you. Too bad you missed out on your blessing in this life. Better luck in your next one.
Fare the well Mathy Jane.
********
Your homework is still the book of Deuteronomy, chapter 28 is a must.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
*********
Mathy Jane was fierce, determined to have her way from birth. Born with fire red hair , porcelain white skin and extraordinary intelligence she was not one to be denied anything she ever wanted. If she wanted it she got it; "by hook or crook".
You can say "hook or crook" was her motto, her credo.
Something happened in her development. I can't say what, but it caused her to be totally unfeeling, uncaring. When she told you that she didn't give a damn she didn't. She would just as soon kill you as a roach.
On the flip side of that she was super sensitive. The slightest negative remark or innocent criticism of anything she did or said earned you a place in her hell.
Yea, she has her own hell. She enjoys her own made up world. I call it The World of Mathy Jane. If you were born to her it would become your prison, your tomb.
Few dared to think about escape. Who could have the nerve, the courage, the intelligence to break free? Defy her if you dare. The whole "family" would be against you in short order. Dispatched to crucify you by Her Highness, you would soon knuckle under.
One thing Mathy Jane always counted on was her money. No, she was never rich for real. She just pretended to be rich. She collected some of the trappings and trinkets of the rich. But she has been a broke ass nigga her whole life. She loves money. Her love of money is not necessarily her problem. Her problem is that she doesn't want YOU to have any. Not one red cent.
It is also true that she always had more money than all of her children, with the exception of the doctor and the little black one that she actually may love.
It was by design. You know most parents want more for their children. Their success is the parents' success. That is how it works naturally. Well, Mathy Jane is the anti-mother. The success of her children is a slap in her face. It makes her acutely ill. Nothing makes her feel better than revenge, a plot, a slander.
Minimal pain won't do. She wants you to suffer. If she thinks you have more than she thinks you deserve she will scheme on you until you are flat busted and broke.
She walked in on her son *Micky's performance. *Micky was making love to that saxophone on stage. The audience was enthralled, on fire. People dared to compare him to John Coltrane and Dexter Gordon. Mathy lost it and started her campaign of total annihilation. She was determined to see him dead. The more she tried the more he thrived and the more she hated him.
She laughs hysterically to herself: "De dumb ass nigga think it was his wife."
*********
Every word of my blog is true. Blogging is my therapy. GOD is my psychiatrist, He is my healer, my protector. GOD has always talked to me, always protected me. He built a hedge around me and saved me from one of the most despicable demons imaginable.
My answer to scoffers is; "What am seen can't be denied." I collected that prophetic true-ism while researching my master's thesis. The master's thesis that she destroyed.
It is cool, it is all in divine order. You never stopped me from doing anything I ever wanted to do. You did get in the way. Perhaps you did arrest my development. One thing for sure, your decadent stealth cruelty made me the best person any one could ever be.
I wish I could say like Jesus; "Go and sin no more.", which would mean absolutely nothing to you. Too bad you missed out on your blessing in this life. Better luck in your next one.
Fare the well Mathy Jane.
********
Your homework is still the book of Deuteronomy, chapter 28 is a must.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Live Every Day Like It Is Your Last
Every day that you live should be your best. Live every day like it is your last, it may be. Never waste a single day. Never just lay in the bed doing nothing. If you are in the bed sick, read a book,write a letter, plan an event, invent something. Study your Bible.
If you are too lazy to read and study your Bible you are in bad shape and getting worse.
I already told you, I am a very unique person. I am self-exposing, I am injured, I still suffer from some lingering anger and a little hatred creeps up on me from time to time. I do love me though. I do love myself. If no one on this earth loves me I know that GOD loves me. If men revile me I can take it. I mean I can with stand it, still hold my head up. It is frustrating though, it's tiring.
Later for ignorant people, I do have to "Move Up a Little Higher."
I told you that I am prejudice. I detest dumb people. Let me rephrase that, I don't like dumb people that are wicked and try to pass their stupidity off as knowledge. I don't like people that spread ignorance.
My frustration stems from the fact that I have had to spend many years "unlearning" a lot of ignorance that was poured into me.
First and foremost, THERE IS ONLY ONE RACE, THE HUMAN RACE!" Quit promoting all this racial nonsense. Too many people use their race as a crutch and too many people use race to hold people down.
Questions concerning racial identity should be illegal. I always put HUMAN on my census. "Black" has nothing to do with me. If you want to know the truth I absolutely detest most "black" people. People that think all "black" people are a single collective body.
I was in the bank the other day and this woman was quite loud and loquacious, and I was laughing and talking with her until she explained to the "Asian" woman that interrupted us to tell her the line was moving ;"Oh I didn't hear hur...I was runnin' my mouf being loud...you know I'm Black! We will sho' git loud!"
Do white people do that ? Do they claim and announce some character flaw?
"I'm sorry, I'm po' white trash! We don't eva wash our hair and we don't wear no shoes in de summer?"
All people have character flaws. That doesn't mean that you have to collect them and wear them like a badge of honor. Why do you let someone else define you? People love to walk up to you and tell you what you think, what you like, what you will do. When you come in contact with that person do know that person is very manipulative and means you absolutely no good.
I went to the library every day as a child. People often told me that "Black people don't read. If you want to hide something from a nigger, put it in a book." I knew that never applied to me. I love to read! A thirst for knowledge is a character issue.
What did her color black have to do with her talking loudly in the bank? What does race have to do with you being late for every function? Black has nothing to do with your ability, but it can effect your motivation.
If you are running around talking about you have to "hit a lick" you're scum. Racial identity has nothing to do with you. You are lazy scum and you are going to get exactly what you deserve. If you sell drugs, it's not your color, IT'S YOUR CHARACTER!
I think "Black" people get a bad rap. Just include me out, don't group me with anyone. "Judge not that you be not judged."
I am tired of paying the black tax. I am tired of dumb a** white men getting over, getting rich just because they are "white". I am tired of "black" people groveling and worshiping "White".
I am tired of people pushing women into whoredom just because they have a vagina. Yes ladies you do have a vagina but you also have a brain. And a man that has to pay for it is not worth your dirty "draws".
Ladies! get an education. Hone your skills. Dream big and stay away from "niggas".
How can you identify a "nigga", they are the ones that are always negative, telling you what you can't do. Then they turn around and brag about how great they are, how great they were. Listen carefully. When you leave them how do you feel about yourself?
Do they make you beg and grovel for chump change? Do they remind you that you owe them money? That is not a Christian. "From such stay away."
Continue to study your Bible children. Read and review the book of Deuteronomy. Pray with expectancy children. When you ask GOD for something, KNOW that you are going to get it.
Be a Blessing. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
If you are too lazy to read and study your Bible you are in bad shape and getting worse.
I already told you, I am a very unique person. I am self-exposing, I am injured, I still suffer from some lingering anger and a little hatred creeps up on me from time to time. I do love me though. I do love myself. If no one on this earth loves me I know that GOD loves me. If men revile me I can take it. I mean I can with stand it, still hold my head up. It is frustrating though, it's tiring.
Later for ignorant people, I do have to "Move Up a Little Higher."
I told you that I am prejudice. I detest dumb people. Let me rephrase that, I don't like dumb people that are wicked and try to pass their stupidity off as knowledge. I don't like people that spread ignorance.
My frustration stems from the fact that I have had to spend many years "unlearning" a lot of ignorance that was poured into me.
First and foremost, THERE IS ONLY ONE RACE, THE HUMAN RACE!" Quit promoting all this racial nonsense. Too many people use their race as a crutch and too many people use race to hold people down.
Questions concerning racial identity should be illegal. I always put HUMAN on my census. "Black" has nothing to do with me. If you want to know the truth I absolutely detest most "black" people. People that think all "black" people are a single collective body.
I was in the bank the other day and this woman was quite loud and loquacious, and I was laughing and talking with her until she explained to the "Asian" woman that interrupted us to tell her the line was moving ;"Oh I didn't hear hur...I was runnin' my mouf being loud...you know I'm Black! We will sho' git loud!"
Do white people do that ? Do they claim and announce some character flaw?
"I'm sorry, I'm po' white trash! We don't eva wash our hair and we don't wear no shoes in de summer?"
All people have character flaws. That doesn't mean that you have to collect them and wear them like a badge of honor. Why do you let someone else define you? People love to walk up to you and tell you what you think, what you like, what you will do. When you come in contact with that person do know that person is very manipulative and means you absolutely no good.
I went to the library every day as a child. People often told me that "Black people don't read. If you want to hide something from a nigger, put it in a book." I knew that never applied to me. I love to read! A thirst for knowledge is a character issue.
What did her color black have to do with her talking loudly in the bank? What does race have to do with you being late for every function? Black has nothing to do with your ability, but it can effect your motivation.
If you are running around talking about you have to "hit a lick" you're scum. Racial identity has nothing to do with you. You are lazy scum and you are going to get exactly what you deserve. If you sell drugs, it's not your color, IT'S YOUR CHARACTER!
I think "Black" people get a bad rap. Just include me out, don't group me with anyone. "Judge not that you be not judged."
I am tired of paying the black tax. I am tired of dumb a** white men getting over, getting rich just because they are "white". I am tired of "black" people groveling and worshiping "White".
I am tired of people pushing women into whoredom just because they have a vagina. Yes ladies you do have a vagina but you also have a brain. And a man that has to pay for it is not worth your dirty "draws".
Ladies! get an education. Hone your skills. Dream big and stay away from "niggas".
How can you identify a "nigga", they are the ones that are always negative, telling you what you can't do. Then they turn around and brag about how great they are, how great they were. Listen carefully. When you leave them how do you feel about yourself?
Do they make you beg and grovel for chump change? Do they remind you that you owe them money? That is not a Christian. "From such stay away."
Continue to study your Bible children. Read and review the book of Deuteronomy. Pray with expectancy children. When you ask GOD for something, KNOW that you are going to get it.
Be a Blessing. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
JR Walters Sent You A Message
Granddaddy sent you a message through me. He is channeling through me. It is quite eerie. I am not afraid, I am in awe! I appreciate the honor, it is indeed a compliment. I can't worry about the people that don't believe me. GOD knows, I know and you know, that is all that matters.
Granddaddy said for you to listen to Dorothy Love-Coates "I'm Just Holding On" He said that one song blessed his life so much when he was down. He said that you did keep him down a lot. But, he said thank you, thank you for strengthening his prayer life. He said that you did break his heart over and over but he forgives you.
"You are my dawter. I love you baby. I'm sorry that you couldn't listen. I nevah lied to you Mathy Jane, no not one time. I told you over and over, "Apart from Christ you are nothing." I know you would not listen. I guess you could not listen. You did the best you could. I still love you. I still pray for you."
He said for you to listen to all of the songs and have "church" right in your bedroom. He said for you to trust the LORD.
"Dawter! You got the cart in front of the hoss. You bragging bout your plot and casket you picked out...you even went ahead and wrote your own obituary! What about your soul? What about eternity? Eternity is a long time. Eternity is forever. You 'gon suffer in Hell for eternity because you are too stubborn to admit that you have been wrong for eighty-five years?"
"Well dawter, it's your life and it is your choice, you go right on and do what you want to....Thank you for my grandchurin and great grandchurin, dey make me proud every day. They are the jewels in my crown."
"There are people that can see right thru you Mathy Jane. Dey ain't no point in you trying to hurt dem! Wrong is wrong, don't matter who doing it. I warned you 'bout dem "roots". I can't git yo out dat hole you dug 'fa ya'sef. You are a deceiver being deceived! You are blind and won't see! Ah ain't nevah stopped praying fa ya. Keep yourself up much as you can. Naw, dawter...ya got to repent...ain't no other way."
*********
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Granddaddy said for you to listen to Dorothy Love-Coates "I'm Just Holding On" He said that one song blessed his life so much when he was down. He said that you did keep him down a lot. But, he said thank you, thank you for strengthening his prayer life. He said that you did break his heart over and over but he forgives you.
"You are my dawter. I love you baby. I'm sorry that you couldn't listen. I nevah lied to you Mathy Jane, no not one time. I told you over and over, "Apart from Christ you are nothing." I know you would not listen. I guess you could not listen. You did the best you could. I still love you. I still pray for you."
He said for you to listen to all of the songs and have "church" right in your bedroom. He said for you to trust the LORD.
"Dawter! You got the cart in front of the hoss. You bragging bout your plot and casket you picked out...you even went ahead and wrote your own obituary! What about your soul? What about eternity? Eternity is a long time. Eternity is forever. You 'gon suffer in Hell for eternity because you are too stubborn to admit that you have been wrong for eighty-five years?"
"Well dawter, it's your life and it is your choice, you go right on and do what you want to....Thank you for my grandchurin and great grandchurin, dey make me proud every day. They are the jewels in my crown."
"There are people that can see right thru you Mathy Jane. Dey ain't no point in you trying to hurt dem! Wrong is wrong, don't matter who doing it. I warned you 'bout dem "roots". I can't git yo out dat hole you dug 'fa ya'sef. You are a deceiver being deceived! You are blind and won't see! Ah ain't nevah stopped praying fa ya. Keep yourself up much as you can. Naw, dawter...ya got to repent...ain't no other way."
*********
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Monday, December 20, 2010
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Thursday, December 16, 2010
"She Been Here Befo'"
"Look at dem eyes! dat chile been heah befo'"
That's what my grandmother Rachel said about me.
I don't know a lot about my grandmother. She died when I was three years old. The memories I do have of her are crystal clear though. It is like I had a camera in my brain.
I heard that she was very spiritual, clairvoyant, a kind of seer.
"Don't talk to dat baby lak dat Mathy Jane, you know she tender hearted."; she admonished my mother.
I know she made my mother promise that she would not mistreat me any more. Mathy Jane made that promise as her mother lay dying in the Cancer Institute in Lumberton.
"I promised GOD that I would become the kind of woman that would make my mother proud if he would just let her live long enough to see it. And I did too, I changed."
Again this was a revelation that came out of no where. You can't change if you can't admit the truth. I fear that Mathy Jane committed many "unpardonable" sins before she matured enough to understand her decadence. Lying was her habit. Denial made her life bearable. The cruelty is pleasurable. Nothing will stop her, nothing short of death. She is a demon. A demon at eighty-five is hopeless. That is a mighty long time to be wrong. Wrong has become a part of her DNA.
She promised GOD that She would live right, She promised that She would not mistreat me. Obviously She failed miserably. Did She try? She always said that She did the best She could. Maybe She did. I think She did the best She would.
I think my mother loved her mother sometime. There are times that She talks so reverently and lovingly about her mother. Then there are times that She says that She wished She had had sense enough to kill her. Could She be two distinctly different women sharing the same body? One a saved and sanctified saint, the other a rank cruel whore? Could the whore be the dominant one? The religious one is the weak one, kind, pleasant, easily manipulated by the mean one. I don't know if she suffers with a multiple personality disorder or She is just as mean as a snake and twice as sneaky. I know living with her is fatiguing and gut wrenchingly painful. The sad thing is that She is so brilliant and devious She could pull off a multi personality scam.
The heartbreaking truth is that She is a talented comedienne and a fantastic writer. Why She never pursued her talent I may never know. It wasn't because of her children. She blames racism, I say it is karma, it is Deuteronomy 28.
"She been heah befo'"; I don't know what my grandmother saw in me. She must have seen something very special. I know that I have a phenomenal memory concerning certain events.
I am sure that I was just shy of two years old. I was standing up straight on the car seat with both of my little arms wrapped around my uncle *Zack's neck as he drove at thrillingly high speeds through the woods of Wade. I had on a pair of raggedy "draws", no shoes and no shirt. It was summer and it was hot. We rode up and down dusty country roads in some big old car. I think it was a green Buick. I had been enjoying Uncle *Zack's company all day. It seems we had been visiting quite a few of his friends. Uncle *Zack was a friendly man, loud and the life of the party. Uncle *Zack was a very good looking man. If he had a physical "flaw" it was the fact that he was short. That was my mother's name for him; "Luddle shawt ass *Zack..." She started every sentence concerning him the same way "Luddle shawt ass *Zack..." She held his height against him like bad credit or bad breath. "My daddy was tall...I don't know whur dat luddle shawt ass nigga came from." They certainly enjoyed sibling rivalry growing up. She never out grew hers apparently.
There had been a lot of drinking and evidently a lot of cussing. No sooner had Uncle *Zack delivered me to my grandmother than I started cursing a blue streak. Totally unaware of my ability to mimic, Uncle *Zack and his friends must have been very liberal in their profanity. A chicken walked across the porch and dropped what chickens do. Angered and disturbed by the "dewkey" splattered on the porch I let out the loudest; "Kill de Muthaf***** !" then continued repeating everything I had heard, exactly the way they said it. He said my words, inflection and pronunciation were perfect.
"Mama said you ain't taking dat baby way from here no mo'." Uncle *Zack bellowed with his uproarious baritone laugh.
I don't know if my grandmother ever let me hang out with Uncle *Zack again. I do know that he had a problem with my mother that day. He made some remark about how she dressed us. What did he do that for? She cursed him up one side and down the other. Evidently Uncle *Zake did the worse thing a person could do to Mathy Jane in his attempt to defend himself from her verbal barrage. He called her a whore. She threatened to kill him on the spot. They had to wrestle the shotgun out of her hand, again. To this day Mathy Jane is famous for pulling guns on people that disagree with her, people she can't intimidate. I think my mother may have been the first Debo.
Uncle *Zack never knew that she professed to hate him until his his dying day. Actually beyond his dying day. She still hates him and his wife.
What kind of mind is that? What kind of person pretends to love?
A fractured person that can not love.
If you can't love, admit it, mind your own business and travel wide. Keep your distance or at least warn people. Say; "There is something wrong with me, I can't be trusted."
If you can't love, find out why. Ask GOD to show you. If you like to hurt people, find out why.
If you are a liar, Stop! Just stop! Take a vow of silence if you have to. Shut up! no one wants to hear your lying mouth.
If you catch someone in a lie, tell them. Do not tolerate lying.
My grandmother said; "A man that will lie, will steal, if you will steal you will kill." She had no idea how right she was.
I know I am different. I am by no means regular. I know GOD spoke to me. I know that he has always protected me. I know that He told me my life was going to be rugged. I was four years old and told my mother how Jesus spoke to me. I know she never listened, or if she listened she didn't believe me.
Attention all future reprobates and child abusers, if your child tells you that GOD spoke to them, leave that child alone.
Stay on Deuteronomy 28 children, stay on it until you get it. Fathers and mothers get in covenant with GOD. Teach by example. "Kind words turneth away wrath."
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
That's what my grandmother Rachel said about me.
I don't know a lot about my grandmother. She died when I was three years old. The memories I do have of her are crystal clear though. It is like I had a camera in my brain.
I heard that she was very spiritual, clairvoyant, a kind of seer.
"Don't talk to dat baby lak dat Mathy Jane, you know she tender hearted."; she admonished my mother.
I know she made my mother promise that she would not mistreat me any more. Mathy Jane made that promise as her mother lay dying in the Cancer Institute in Lumberton.
"I promised GOD that I would become the kind of woman that would make my mother proud if he would just let her live long enough to see it. And I did too, I changed."
Again this was a revelation that came out of no where. You can't change if you can't admit the truth. I fear that Mathy Jane committed many "unpardonable" sins before she matured enough to understand her decadence. Lying was her habit. Denial made her life bearable. The cruelty is pleasurable. Nothing will stop her, nothing short of death. She is a demon. A demon at eighty-five is hopeless. That is a mighty long time to be wrong. Wrong has become a part of her DNA.
She promised GOD that She would live right, She promised that She would not mistreat me. Obviously She failed miserably. Did She try? She always said that She did the best She could. Maybe She did. I think She did the best She would.
I think my mother loved her mother sometime. There are times that She talks so reverently and lovingly about her mother. Then there are times that She says that She wished She had had sense enough to kill her. Could She be two distinctly different women sharing the same body? One a saved and sanctified saint, the other a rank cruel whore? Could the whore be the dominant one? The religious one is the weak one, kind, pleasant, easily manipulated by the mean one. I don't know if she suffers with a multiple personality disorder or She is just as mean as a snake and twice as sneaky. I know living with her is fatiguing and gut wrenchingly painful. The sad thing is that She is so brilliant and devious She could pull off a multi personality scam.
The heartbreaking truth is that She is a talented comedienne and a fantastic writer. Why She never pursued her talent I may never know. It wasn't because of her children. She blames racism, I say it is karma, it is Deuteronomy 28.
"She been heah befo'"; I don't know what my grandmother saw in me. She must have seen something very special. I know that I have a phenomenal memory concerning certain events.
I am sure that I was just shy of two years old. I was standing up straight on the car seat with both of my little arms wrapped around my uncle *Zack's neck as he drove at thrillingly high speeds through the woods of Wade. I had on a pair of raggedy "draws", no shoes and no shirt. It was summer and it was hot. We rode up and down dusty country roads in some big old car. I think it was a green Buick. I had been enjoying Uncle *Zack's company all day. It seems we had been visiting quite a few of his friends. Uncle *Zack was a friendly man, loud and the life of the party. Uncle *Zack was a very good looking man. If he had a physical "flaw" it was the fact that he was short. That was my mother's name for him; "Luddle shawt ass *Zack..." She started every sentence concerning him the same way "Luddle shawt ass *Zack..." She held his height against him like bad credit or bad breath. "My daddy was tall...I don't know whur dat luddle shawt ass nigga came from." They certainly enjoyed sibling rivalry growing up. She never out grew hers apparently.
There had been a lot of drinking and evidently a lot of cussing. No sooner had Uncle *Zack delivered me to my grandmother than I started cursing a blue streak. Totally unaware of my ability to mimic, Uncle *Zack and his friends must have been very liberal in their profanity. A chicken walked across the porch and dropped what chickens do. Angered and disturbed by the "dewkey" splattered on the porch I let out the loudest; "Kill de Muthaf***** !" then continued repeating everything I had heard, exactly the way they said it. He said my words, inflection and pronunciation were perfect.
"Mama said you ain't taking dat baby way from here no mo'." Uncle *Zack bellowed with his uproarious baritone laugh.
I don't know if my grandmother ever let me hang out with Uncle *Zack again. I do know that he had a problem with my mother that day. He made some remark about how she dressed us. What did he do that for? She cursed him up one side and down the other. Evidently Uncle *Zake did the worse thing a person could do to Mathy Jane in his attempt to defend himself from her verbal barrage. He called her a whore. She threatened to kill him on the spot. They had to wrestle the shotgun out of her hand, again. To this day Mathy Jane is famous for pulling guns on people that disagree with her, people she can't intimidate. I think my mother may have been the first Debo.
Uncle *Zack never knew that she professed to hate him until his his dying day. Actually beyond his dying day. She still hates him and his wife.
What kind of mind is that? What kind of person pretends to love?
A fractured person that can not love.
If you can't love, admit it, mind your own business and travel wide. Keep your distance or at least warn people. Say; "There is something wrong with me, I can't be trusted."
If you can't love, find out why. Ask GOD to show you. If you like to hurt people, find out why.
If you are a liar, Stop! Just stop! Take a vow of silence if you have to. Shut up! no one wants to hear your lying mouth.
If you catch someone in a lie, tell them. Do not tolerate lying.
My grandmother said; "A man that will lie, will steal, if you will steal you will kill." She had no idea how right she was.
I know I am different. I am by no means regular. I know GOD spoke to me. I know that he has always protected me. I know that He told me my life was going to be rugged. I was four years old and told my mother how Jesus spoke to me. I know she never listened, or if she listened she didn't believe me.
Attention all future reprobates and child abusers, if your child tells you that GOD spoke to them, leave that child alone.
Stay on Deuteronomy 28 children, stay on it until you get it. Fathers and mothers get in covenant with GOD. Teach by example. "Kind words turneth away wrath."
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Conditioned To Suffer
She depends on our fear. Fully aware of the panic and anxiety that she causes, she toys with you;
"*Sam, you still driving that old ass car?"
Saying this knowing full well that she is the direct cause of his financial state.
She did the same thing to me that she did to my little brother *Micky. She convinced him, a tall handsome man, that he is ugly. How and why would any woman call her son ugly repeatedly? She drilled it into his head, into our head. She mistreated him, so we mistreated him. We mistreated each other, to this day we are no more than polite strangers that share a very dark secret. Our mother is a horrible demon masquerading as a minister of the Gospel. World you are in for a shock. Be careful who you allow up in your churches, up in your pulpit. Practice discernment.
Speaking of ugly, she had a string of the most hideously ugly repugnant men and women I have ever seen. She did these despicable things then turned around and took it out on us. She demands to keep us in this fantasy world that she built around herself. In her mind, She is the most beautiful, the fairest of them all, She is the smartest, the richest, the wisest. She is the Godmother. She grants all wishes and dashes all dreams. You will not have a lover or significant other. You will not have peace in your house. She keeps her house "dressed" while "rooting" yours. She will feed you her laced food while she dumps yours in the garbage.
She did despicable things then turned around and took her guilt out on us.
I was looking at her looking at me and she was looking at me looking at her. It was like some primitive dance, we walked slowly in a circle. It was a contest, who was going to be the first one to flinch, to blink? I think I must have lost. Fear will betray you.
Now over forty-one years later it is difficult to remember what I actually thought, what I really knew.
I do remember the excruciating pain. I do remember sinking into a strange black hole.
She called me in Atlanta. I was still in the bed. I don't know why I was still sleeping at ten a.m. I must have been out the night before, or just trying to exert some form of independence because She rarely let you sleep past six a.m. in her house.
"Get Up! Get Up!!! Get your muthaf****** asses UP! Get the F*** UP!"
Many times we got up for no apparent reason. The dishes were washed, the house was clean. There were no flowers to be weeded. There was nothing to do. So She would come up with bizarre tasks like:
"Wash dem f****** walls!"
Always too cheap to buy the proper cleaning agents she would make us use some strange concoction that only made the matter worse. Dutch cleanser and vinegar. She would not let us use old rags.
"Use dat f***** newspaper Nigga! You stupid muthaf*****." Why would anyone in their right mind want to use old newspapers to wash baseboards and walls? Don't argue with a fool, just do it was my solution to her insanity.
Now I know that She was making us pay for some horrible sin that was haunting her. She had probably been out "lesbian-ing" or prostituting.
Well to this day I have a problem with getting up early on a Saturday morning.
The ringing of the phone disturbed my peaceful rest. I lived in a very swank apartment overlooking the Chattahoochee River in Smyrna.
My "Hello" was weak and raspy.
"Gwen! Your daddy (not granddaddy) just blow-e-e-ed! his Heart OUT!!! He killed hissef!"
My very first thought was;'She did it! She did it! The bitch finally killed him!' Everything else that happened was like a dream. I couldn't cry, I couldn't talk.
The first thing I did was call my principal to make arrangements for bereavement leave. When I told my principal that my grandfather had just killed himself something deep inside of me told me that I was lying.
Why? Why was I lying? Was I trying to protect her? me? the family name? I know now that it was confrontation. The last thing you ever wanted to do was confront this creature. I had too many bloody memories of pistol whippings, brutal beatings. She bragged too much about her history;
"Hell yea! I stabbed that f****** bitch!...I flushed three of dem muthf*****! down de toilet!"
Yes I was a punk ass, I was scared, I was conditioned.
I rushed to Fayetteville and watched her, I listened. There were no tears. She was quite calm, stately and reserved.
"De police gave me a paraffin test...said dey didn't find no gun power residue."
She volunteered that. It came from nowhere.
It was in the her bedroom, the scene of the murder, where she slipped up.
"See whur your daddy put de gun after he shot hissef in de Heart!"
'After he shot himself in the Heart!!!' My brother, a medical doctor, was standing right beside me. We knew, our eyes locked and we knew.
Why didn't we do anything? Now I know that it was conditioned terror and fear. She thinks it was her mighty "root working".
I am going to tell you again, there is nothing covered that shall not be revealed.
Continue to study your Bible children. Step out on faith. Trust the Living Risen LORD with all your heart.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up as much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
P.S. "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
"*Sam, you still driving that old ass car?"
Saying this knowing full well that she is the direct cause of his financial state.
She did the same thing to me that she did to my little brother *Micky. She convinced him, a tall handsome man, that he is ugly. How and why would any woman call her son ugly repeatedly? She drilled it into his head, into our head. She mistreated him, so we mistreated him. We mistreated each other, to this day we are no more than polite strangers that share a very dark secret. Our mother is a horrible demon masquerading as a minister of the Gospel. World you are in for a shock. Be careful who you allow up in your churches, up in your pulpit. Practice discernment.
Speaking of ugly, she had a string of the most hideously ugly repugnant men and women I have ever seen. She did these despicable things then turned around and took it out on us. She demands to keep us in this fantasy world that she built around herself. In her mind, She is the most beautiful, the fairest of them all, She is the smartest, the richest, the wisest. She is the Godmother. She grants all wishes and dashes all dreams. You will not have a lover or significant other. You will not have peace in your house. She keeps her house "dressed" while "rooting" yours. She will feed you her laced food while she dumps yours in the garbage.
She did despicable things then turned around and took her guilt out on us.
I was looking at her looking at me and she was looking at me looking at her. It was like some primitive dance, we walked slowly in a circle. It was a contest, who was going to be the first one to flinch, to blink? I think I must have lost. Fear will betray you.
Now over forty-one years later it is difficult to remember what I actually thought, what I really knew.
I do remember the excruciating pain. I do remember sinking into a strange black hole.
She called me in Atlanta. I was still in the bed. I don't know why I was still sleeping at ten a.m. I must have been out the night before, or just trying to exert some form of independence because She rarely let you sleep past six a.m. in her house.
"Get Up! Get Up!!! Get your muthaf****** asses UP! Get the F*** UP!"
Many times we got up for no apparent reason. The dishes were washed, the house was clean. There were no flowers to be weeded. There was nothing to do. So She would come up with bizarre tasks like:
"Wash dem f****** walls!"
Always too cheap to buy the proper cleaning agents she would make us use some strange concoction that only made the matter worse. Dutch cleanser and vinegar. She would not let us use old rags.
"Use dat f***** newspaper Nigga! You stupid muthaf*****." Why would anyone in their right mind want to use old newspapers to wash baseboards and walls? Don't argue with a fool, just do it was my solution to her insanity.
Now I know that She was making us pay for some horrible sin that was haunting her. She had probably been out "lesbian-ing" or prostituting.
Well to this day I have a problem with getting up early on a Saturday morning.
The ringing of the phone disturbed my peaceful rest. I lived in a very swank apartment overlooking the Chattahoochee River in Smyrna.
My "Hello" was weak and raspy.
"Gwen! Your daddy (not granddaddy) just blow-e-e-ed! his Heart OUT!!! He killed hissef!"
My very first thought was;'She did it! She did it! The bitch finally killed him!' Everything else that happened was like a dream. I couldn't cry, I couldn't talk.
The first thing I did was call my principal to make arrangements for bereavement leave. When I told my principal that my grandfather had just killed himself something deep inside of me told me that I was lying.
Why? Why was I lying? Was I trying to protect her? me? the family name? I know now that it was confrontation. The last thing you ever wanted to do was confront this creature. I had too many bloody memories of pistol whippings, brutal beatings. She bragged too much about her history;
"Hell yea! I stabbed that f****** bitch!...I flushed three of dem muthf*****! down de toilet!"
Yes I was a punk ass, I was scared, I was conditioned.
I rushed to Fayetteville and watched her, I listened. There were no tears. She was quite calm, stately and reserved.
"De police gave me a paraffin test...said dey didn't find no gun power residue."
She volunteered that. It came from nowhere.
It was in the her bedroom, the scene of the murder, where she slipped up.
"See whur your daddy put de gun after he shot hissef in de Heart!"
'After he shot himself in the Heart!!!' My brother, a medical doctor, was standing right beside me. We knew, our eyes locked and we knew.
Why didn't we do anything? Now I know that it was conditioned terror and fear. She thinks it was her mighty "root working".
I am going to tell you again, there is nothing covered that shall not be revealed.
Continue to study your Bible children. Step out on faith. Trust the Living Risen LORD with all your heart.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up as much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
P.S. "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Don't Let the Devil Have Your Mind!
GOD cautioned us, He warned us "lean not to your own understanding." because He knows how simple we are, how easily influenced we are. Satan knows too. That is why he is quick to fool you, lead you astray. Satan will blind your eyes and deafen your ears. First he takes away your natural affection, you can't love like you should. Then he takes away your ability to experience Joy. Give space to the devil and he will confuse you, tie you up and use you like a puppet.
Oh yea, he will give you some trinkets, some "glory". He will buy you a Cadillac, he might put in a fine home, he may even make you a "preacher". But, he won't let you feel good. He will haunt you, lay guilt on you and make you deny your sin. Satan will turn you into a succubus, a vile creature. I'm telling you Satan will make you hate yourself. Once Satan has ruined your life, turned you into a despicable demon, he will forsake you and laugh at you trying to crawl out of that pit you dug for others.
"It is a secret war" children "enemy unseen." (*Alice Lovelace) The devil is marching to and fro seeking whom he shall destroy while we watch and wait in silence. We think our fine bodies, pretty faces, and superb guile will get us over. We only pray to GOD when we need something, and some of us PREY on man twenty-four seven.
How are you going to PRAY to GOD while you PREY on your fellow man, on your kit and kin, on your own children? Getting your lights turned on in your baby's name. Telling your beautiful daughter that she is sitting on a gold mine.
GOD will no have it I tell you. He will spew you out of His mouth!
Most of us are ashamed of Him in public, will not say "amen", will not stand and proclaim His Glory. We laugh at others and call them too religious, too sanctified. Remember, Peter walked on water until he thought about his circumstances. He probably thought; "What will people say, this is crazy, I better play it safe and be like everybody else."
Why they embarrass us with all that PTL! Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah, Hold my mule talk. That's how we feel until WE get in trouble, until WE get sick, until WE get broke.
I came by to tell you; "Come ye out from among them!. GOD is looking for some peculiar people, some people that have been set apart. He is looking for some brave soldiers, some prayer warriors, some Holy Ghost filled, Sold Out for Christ! people.
Don't let a bunch of old reprobates fool you. "Apart from Christ you are nothing!"
Stay in His Word children. Your homework is to read and memorize the 28TH chapter of Deuteronomy, particularly verses 12 through 16 and verses 20, 25, 27, 29 and 35.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Oh yea, he will give you some trinkets, some "glory". He will buy you a Cadillac, he might put in a fine home, he may even make you a "preacher". But, he won't let you feel good. He will haunt you, lay guilt on you and make you deny your sin. Satan will turn you into a succubus, a vile creature. I'm telling you Satan will make you hate yourself. Once Satan has ruined your life, turned you into a despicable demon, he will forsake you and laugh at you trying to crawl out of that pit you dug for others.
"It is a secret war" children "enemy unseen." (*Alice Lovelace) The devil is marching to and fro seeking whom he shall destroy while we watch and wait in silence. We think our fine bodies, pretty faces, and superb guile will get us over. We only pray to GOD when we need something, and some of us PREY on man twenty-four seven.
How are you going to PRAY to GOD while you PREY on your fellow man, on your kit and kin, on your own children? Getting your lights turned on in your baby's name. Telling your beautiful daughter that she is sitting on a gold mine.
GOD will no have it I tell you. He will spew you out of His mouth!
Most of us are ashamed of Him in public, will not say "amen", will not stand and proclaim His Glory. We laugh at others and call them too religious, too sanctified. Remember, Peter walked on water until he thought about his circumstances. He probably thought; "What will people say, this is crazy, I better play it safe and be like everybody else."
Why they embarrass us with all that PTL! Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah, Hold my mule talk. That's how we feel until WE get in trouble, until WE get sick, until WE get broke.
I came by to tell you; "Come ye out from among them!. GOD is looking for some peculiar people, some people that have been set apart. He is looking for some brave soldiers, some prayer warriors, some Holy Ghost filled, Sold Out for Christ! people.
Don't let a bunch of old reprobates fool you. "Apart from Christ you are nothing!"
Stay in His Word children. Your homework is to read and memorize the 28TH chapter of Deuteronomy, particularly verses 12 through 16 and verses 20, 25, 27, 29 and 35.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
What You Need to Know
You need to know that there are some women who call themselves "mother" and have no right to the title. There are some women that give birth to children and "parent" them very begrudgingly and cruelly. You need to know that there are some women so afflicted by the sins of lust, envy and greed they partner with Satan to destroy all the innocent and righteous that come in contact with them. You need to know that their time is up, they shall proceed no further.
Thank you Lord for loosing me! Thank you for my deliverance from that succubus. Dear Lord thank you for Your courage. Thank you for my cross.
Well it is Tuesday, December 14, 2010. Another year has come and gone much too quickly. You are older, but are you wiser? What did you learn this year? Are you for real or are you just another Bible quoting phony? Could you be a demon? Do you hate anyone? Is your mind in a constant state of deceit and guile? Are you a liar? Do you injure your children to the point that they refuse to be around you? Do you know that you will reap what you sow? For real, everything that you sowed. Do you think crawling up in a pulpit preaching some one's sermon that you stole or reciting some one's prayer holds any sway with GOD? Are you paranoid? Do you think everyone is trying to scam you because you are the world's greatest scam artist? Did you tell your daughter not to piss on your grave when you are dead? Has your daughter ever told one single lie on you? Do you hate your daughter because you think she is prettier than you, smarter than you, more Christ like than you? Did you hate your father for loving her? supporting her? encouraging her? Do you hate you father for having such a good name? Did you hate your father for gently admonishing your whorish behavior? Did your father live too long? Were you just plan tired and irritable? Were you mad with GOD and the world for prohibiting you from living your lesbian lifestyle? Did you shoot your father in the heart and call it suicide? Have you been working "roots" on four of your children because they are bastards and should never have been born?
Are you sorry yet? Can you feel anything but hatred and jealousy? Can you find the sheep's clothing that fell off of you?
Can you stand where you are and stretch your arms to GOD and ask Him to forgive you? Can you read your Bible and find all of the scripture that applies to you and say; "Dear Lord, I was ignorant, I got caught up in sin, I was foolish and I thought that lying and "rooting" and brutalizing was the best way?"
Dear Children, "it is a secret war, enemy unseen." *(Alice Lovelace) We are in a secret war and GOD has no time for or use for weak impotent lip serving Christians. If you see wrong doing ANYWHERE you have an obligation to call it out, even if it is in your own family!
Stay on 2 Chronicles 7:14 for a while. Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thank you Lord for loosing me! Thank you for my deliverance from that succubus. Dear Lord thank you for Your courage. Thank you for my cross.
Well it is Tuesday, December 14, 2010. Another year has come and gone much too quickly. You are older, but are you wiser? What did you learn this year? Are you for real or are you just another Bible quoting phony? Could you be a demon? Do you hate anyone? Is your mind in a constant state of deceit and guile? Are you a liar? Do you injure your children to the point that they refuse to be around you? Do you know that you will reap what you sow? For real, everything that you sowed. Do you think crawling up in a pulpit preaching some one's sermon that you stole or reciting some one's prayer holds any sway with GOD? Are you paranoid? Do you think everyone is trying to scam you because you are the world's greatest scam artist? Did you tell your daughter not to piss on your grave when you are dead? Has your daughter ever told one single lie on you? Do you hate your daughter because you think she is prettier than you, smarter than you, more Christ like than you? Did you hate your father for loving her? supporting her? encouraging her? Do you hate you father for having such a good name? Did you hate your father for gently admonishing your whorish behavior? Did your father live too long? Were you just plan tired and irritable? Were you mad with GOD and the world for prohibiting you from living your lesbian lifestyle? Did you shoot your father in the heart and call it suicide? Have you been working "roots" on four of your children because they are bastards and should never have been born?
Are you sorry yet? Can you feel anything but hatred and jealousy? Can you find the sheep's clothing that fell off of you?
Can you stand where you are and stretch your arms to GOD and ask Him to forgive you? Can you read your Bible and find all of the scripture that applies to you and say; "Dear Lord, I was ignorant, I got caught up in sin, I was foolish and I thought that lying and "rooting" and brutalizing was the best way?"
Dear Children, "it is a secret war, enemy unseen." *(Alice Lovelace) We are in a secret war and GOD has no time for or use for weak impotent lip serving Christians. If you see wrong doing ANYWHERE you have an obligation to call it out, even if it is in your own family!
Stay on 2 Chronicles 7:14 for a while. Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Open Letter #2
You stupid, stupid woman. It was never your clever stealth "voodoo" that kept your dark secrets. It was love. Pure love, love unfeigned, innocence, God's natural plan. GOD commanded us to love one another. You haven't been discovered by many because they are still blinded by your charm. They still want to love you desperately. They still need you. The message; "Your enemies shall be of your own household" is still a Biblical mystery to them.
We went to church every Sunday. We prayed together, cried together and on many occasions helped each other. How could I know? No, your words rarely fit your actions, but how could I know? Always professing your great love, always lauding on the compliments. One son became Dr. *Sam The Black Prince. I became Miss Gwen. Our talents were proclaimed. I didn't know you envied and hated us at the same time.
I am fifty-nine years old and you have never given me a birthday present in my entire life. You gave me the same thing every year, a song and some long detailed story of my birth. "You were born in St.Phillips Medical Hospital. June 4TH, 1951, oh you hurt. I hollered so ...but you were the prettiest little baby I ever saw. You were yalla chile! You even had freckles. But you had dese luddle black ass ears. Dey said you wuz gonna turn black and you sho did...within six months you were as black as a crow. Ya damn daddy nevah did any thing for you..." Ya-dah, ya-dah, on and on. No mother, it was you. You are the one that never did anything for me but try to hurt me. You are the one that misused me and crushed me. You are the one that hurt me over and over. I do forgive you and I will not hate you.
I grew up watching you work "roots" on people. Never did it occur to me that you would work "roots" on us, try to destroy us.
Poor MJ, you are nothing more than a slave. An ignorant primitive slave, left over from the antebellum period. How did your mentality survive the Emancipation Proclamation? the 13TH amendment, THE CIVIL RIGHTS STRUGGLE! You always brag about how you hate Martin Luther Coon. You even bought and paid for a Klan record (45rpm) ridiculing him.
How did you slip through time? Some people dismiss the Willie Lynch Letter as a nonsensical fabrication, but your actions prove its authenticity and it's prophetic pronouncements.
Not only are you a genuine slave, the perfect house nigger, you are a succubus, a demon without focus, a rampaging demon without a plan.
Yea, you messed up. You messed up bad, but you were too beautiful, too brilliant to ever be wrong.
What did you think when you tricked your father out of tuition money for Virginia Union? What did you think when you turned down a full scholarship to Shaw University because you said you didn't want to be no damn nurse. How did you feel years later when you ended up at Womack Army Hospital emptying bedpans for minimum wage as a nurse's aid?
I can tell you how you felt. You felt rotten. Most of all you felt jealous. Too full of pride to ever admit that you were wrong you launched head first into a campaign of destruction. Maim, lacerate, lead astray, but ultimately destroy all that is good. Of course you should do this you told yourself. After all it was your ignorant ass parent's fault. Those two dumb ass niggers taught you to be honest. They didn't tell you where babies came from. Your daddy was running a juke joint and made you get pregnant at sixteen. Black ass niggers were jealous of you, always telling damn lies on you. The white man was racist and keeping you down. You could have been somebody if GOD hadn't saddled you with all of them black ass younguns. The fact that one could pass for white was his luck. When he complained that you never did anything for him you hit him with; "I gave you color nigga! Do sump'um wid dat!" If you are really that ignorant you are hopeless.
You are hopeless, you are lost, you can't even hear the words you preach.
I can not help you and I am tired of trying. I am telling my story to help heal others like me. Children of demons, children of sick demented ignorant parents that try to hold down their entire family so that they can remain number one, remain on top of their little ant hill.
There is no denying. The evidence against you is indisputable. Your son was the first black doctor on prestigious Owen Drive, you destroyed his practice and ran him out of town. You spread malicious lies and scandalized his good name.
Your other talented son is a brilliant musician. You tricked him out of college, sabotaged his band. You ruined that boy. You, his own mother call him a hopeless alcoholic,a sorry no count drunk. You never tell anyone how you beat and abused him from infancy. You never tell that you are ashamed to admit that he is an outside child. You were whoring while married and got pregnant by your outside man.
I do believe that you reserved your greatest cruelty for me. I thank you. I thank you for every lash, for every stab, for every lie. GOD knew what I needed and He knows what I don't need and I don't need you.
I don't need you to mail me anymore poison pen letters smeared in your fecal matter. I don't need you turning me in to the IRS or narcing on me to the government for student loans. You've destroyed my name within the family. I don't care. People that would believe you should not be in my life.
I know that you are not ashamed or embarrassed. It is far beyond your scope of understanding. Granddaddy always pitied your extreme ignorance. There is no magic pill that you can take. "You are going out of the world backwards like you did when you first came here."
May GOD bless you. May you not die raging with hatred and alone. May you come to some understanding of your hideous rebellious life.
Children the lesson learned here is that you can't play with GOD. There is no compromising. Let your yea be yea and your nay be nay. If you are double minded trying to serve GOD and man, go no further. Change. Study your Bible. Do not ride your Bible in the back window of your car to fool people. Don't invest thousands of dollars in gold crosses to front and play the role of a sanctified Christian. Acknowledge Truth when you hear it. If you make a mistake or commit a sin be quick to repent.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
We went to church every Sunday. We prayed together, cried together and on many occasions helped each other. How could I know? No, your words rarely fit your actions, but how could I know? Always professing your great love, always lauding on the compliments. One son became Dr. *Sam The Black Prince. I became Miss Gwen. Our talents were proclaimed. I didn't know you envied and hated us at the same time.
I am fifty-nine years old and you have never given me a birthday present in my entire life. You gave me the same thing every year, a song and some long detailed story of my birth. "You were born in St.Phillips Medical Hospital. June 4TH, 1951, oh you hurt. I hollered so ...but you were the prettiest little baby I ever saw. You were yalla chile! You even had freckles. But you had dese luddle black ass ears. Dey said you wuz gonna turn black and you sho did...within six months you were as black as a crow. Ya damn daddy nevah did any thing for you..." Ya-dah, ya-dah, on and on. No mother, it was you. You are the one that never did anything for me but try to hurt me. You are the one that misused me and crushed me. You are the one that hurt me over and over. I do forgive you and I will not hate you.
I grew up watching you work "roots" on people. Never did it occur to me that you would work "roots" on us, try to destroy us.
Poor MJ, you are nothing more than a slave. An ignorant primitive slave, left over from the antebellum period. How did your mentality survive the Emancipation Proclamation? the 13TH amendment, THE CIVIL RIGHTS STRUGGLE! You always brag about how you hate Martin Luther Coon. You even bought and paid for a Klan record (45rpm) ridiculing him.
How did you slip through time? Some people dismiss the Willie Lynch Letter as a nonsensical fabrication, but your actions prove its authenticity and it's prophetic pronouncements.
Not only are you a genuine slave, the perfect house nigger, you are a succubus, a demon without focus, a rampaging demon without a plan.
Yea, you messed up. You messed up bad, but you were too beautiful, too brilliant to ever be wrong.
What did you think when you tricked your father out of tuition money for Virginia Union? What did you think when you turned down a full scholarship to Shaw University because you said you didn't want to be no damn nurse. How did you feel years later when you ended up at Womack Army Hospital emptying bedpans for minimum wage as a nurse's aid?
I can tell you how you felt. You felt rotten. Most of all you felt jealous. Too full of pride to ever admit that you were wrong you launched head first into a campaign of destruction. Maim, lacerate, lead astray, but ultimately destroy all that is good. Of course you should do this you told yourself. After all it was your ignorant ass parent's fault. Those two dumb ass niggers taught you to be honest. They didn't tell you where babies came from. Your daddy was running a juke joint and made you get pregnant at sixteen. Black ass niggers were jealous of you, always telling damn lies on you. The white man was racist and keeping you down. You could have been somebody if GOD hadn't saddled you with all of them black ass younguns. The fact that one could pass for white was his luck. When he complained that you never did anything for him you hit him with; "I gave you color nigga! Do sump'um wid dat!" If you are really that ignorant you are hopeless.
You are hopeless, you are lost, you can't even hear the words you preach.
I can not help you and I am tired of trying. I am telling my story to help heal others like me. Children of demons, children of sick demented ignorant parents that try to hold down their entire family so that they can remain number one, remain on top of their little ant hill.
There is no denying. The evidence against you is indisputable. Your son was the first black doctor on prestigious Owen Drive, you destroyed his practice and ran him out of town. You spread malicious lies and scandalized his good name.
Your other talented son is a brilliant musician. You tricked him out of college, sabotaged his band. You ruined that boy. You, his own mother call him a hopeless alcoholic,a sorry no count drunk. You never tell anyone how you beat and abused him from infancy. You never tell that you are ashamed to admit that he is an outside child. You were whoring while married and got pregnant by your outside man.
I do believe that you reserved your greatest cruelty for me. I thank you. I thank you for every lash, for every stab, for every lie. GOD knew what I needed and He knows what I don't need and I don't need you.
I don't need you to mail me anymore poison pen letters smeared in your fecal matter. I don't need you turning me in to the IRS or narcing on me to the government for student loans. You've destroyed my name within the family. I don't care. People that would believe you should not be in my life.
I know that you are not ashamed or embarrassed. It is far beyond your scope of understanding. Granddaddy always pitied your extreme ignorance. There is no magic pill that you can take. "You are going out of the world backwards like you did when you first came here."
May GOD bless you. May you not die raging with hatred and alone. May you come to some understanding of your hideous rebellious life.
Children the lesson learned here is that you can't play with GOD. There is no compromising. Let your yea be yea and your nay be nay. If you are double minded trying to serve GOD and man, go no further. Change. Study your Bible. Do not ride your Bible in the back window of your car to fool people. Don't invest thousands of dollars in gold crosses to front and play the role of a sanctified Christian. Acknowledge Truth when you hear it. If you make a mistake or commit a sin be quick to repent.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Saturday, December 11, 2010
THANK YOU LORD!!!
Good Morning World! I am so excited! I am so blessed! I thank GOD for my journey! I thank GOD for my testimony. HALLELUJAH!!!PRAISE THE LORD!!! I feel gooooood! church! Let the church say Amen" I feel hold my mule while I shout good!
Thank you Jesus for your miraculous delivery! Thank you for your revelation.
See, first of all I am somebody! I am a child of the King of Kings.
I was beaten down children. I was laid low!
Pull up a chair and let me tell you about it.
The first thing you've got to know is that The Bible is real! Every prophetic Word is true and I am living proof.
"Fear them not, there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed and hid that shall not be known." (Matthew 10:26)
It is no joke. Scoffers beware.
My mother is a violent, sadistic, narcissist. She was a very beautiful woman, she is brilliant and talented, but she is a demon.
I have a story to tell. I have a testimony. My life reads better than any psychological thriller.
My mother, MJ was born in 1925 to a (black) married couple. Jerome and Rachel had a wedding. You must put this in the correct historical context. This indicates that they had class. My mother would often share tales of how my grandfather "courted" my grandmother. The fact that she was born in wedlock is central to my life. The number of times that she bragged; "My mama and daddy wuz married!" can not be calculated.
My grandfather was a very wise gentleman, a sage, a pillar in the community. He had a large farm, sixty-five acres of land. He was totally self sufficient and debt free. He loved his children and he loved family. He was the best thing that ever happened to me.
My grandfather was a true Christian man. He loved the Lord and he taught me to do the same. He was in covenant with GOD. His wayward fourteen year old daughter became accursed and tried her best to destroy his good name. She will not succeed.
I am still piecing this horrible puzzle together. My mother was the only girl. I am sure she was the apple of her father's eye. I am assuming by the stories I heard that her brown skin mother must have been very color struck. Her mother doted on her and inadvertently created a narcissistic demon.
I have verbal clues and hard evidence.
"I nevah had to do nothing! I never had to wash a pair of socks until I was eighteen years old. My mother didn't want me to learn, said she didn't want me to be a washer woman like hur."
My entire life hangs on that one admission. At fifty-nine I can clearly see that she made it her life's mission to make sure I never enjoyed the love and blessings that she had. While she was not allowed to do housework or wash clothes I was put in a straight chair, on my knees, propped up against the sink and forced to wash dishes at five years old. My hands were so tiny that the large slippery plates would just slide out of my little hands and crash onto the floor. I soon learned how to develop a much tighter grip. She beat me miserably. "Fa every f****** plate you break, fa every f***** glass I am going to beat the f****** dog s**** out of you nigga! You black muthaf***** nigga! You ain't s**** You luddle black heifah!"
It's kind'a funny. Out of all the horrible names she called me "luddle black heifah" hurt the most. At five years old I did not know what a heifer was. I knew that I didn't like the sound of it.
Not only did she have me washing dishes I had to wash s**** baby diapers. Her baby's nasty diapers. She taught me well. I learned how to unroll the diaper in the toilet and slosh it around in the toilet bowl with my bare hands. I had to slosh and flush at the same time . When all of the fecal matter had disappeared, when the diaper was white again I had to wring it out and put it in the diaper bucket. For every diaper that I let slip, that got away from me and flushed down the toilet she beat me unmercifully again. As disgusting as that was, nothing prepared me for what was to come. Her little sex games with her husband. I guess they didn't have any sex toys in 1956.
There must be at least a thousand more terrible incidents that I suffered at her hands over the course of my life. It is all in my book.
I have a message! I have a cross to bear. I will save little children. I will expose pedophiles.
Children please hear! "FEAR NO MAN"
Do not cower in silence because you do not want to be embarrassed. Do not hide because you are ashamed. Love and trust The Living LORD! He will open doors that no man can close.
Work out you own salvation. Study your Bible. Pray for the indwelling of His Holy Spirit.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thank you Jesus for your miraculous delivery! Thank you for your revelation.
See, first of all I am somebody! I am a child of the King of Kings.
I was beaten down children. I was laid low!
Pull up a chair and let me tell you about it.
The first thing you've got to know is that The Bible is real! Every prophetic Word is true and I am living proof.
"Fear them not, there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed and hid that shall not be known." (Matthew 10:26)
It is no joke. Scoffers beware.
My mother is a violent, sadistic, narcissist. She was a very beautiful woman, she is brilliant and talented, but she is a demon.
I have a story to tell. I have a testimony. My life reads better than any psychological thriller.
My mother, MJ was born in 1925 to a (black) married couple. Jerome and Rachel had a wedding. You must put this in the correct historical context. This indicates that they had class. My mother would often share tales of how my grandfather "courted" my grandmother. The fact that she was born in wedlock is central to my life. The number of times that she bragged; "My mama and daddy wuz married!" can not be calculated.
My grandfather was a very wise gentleman, a sage, a pillar in the community. He had a large farm, sixty-five acres of land. He was totally self sufficient and debt free. He loved his children and he loved family. He was the best thing that ever happened to me.
My grandfather was a true Christian man. He loved the Lord and he taught me to do the same. He was in covenant with GOD. His wayward fourteen year old daughter became accursed and tried her best to destroy his good name. She will not succeed.
I am still piecing this horrible puzzle together. My mother was the only girl. I am sure she was the apple of her father's eye. I am assuming by the stories I heard that her brown skin mother must have been very color struck. Her mother doted on her and inadvertently created a narcissistic demon.
I have verbal clues and hard evidence.
"I nevah had to do nothing! I never had to wash a pair of socks until I was eighteen years old. My mother didn't want me to learn, said she didn't want me to be a washer woman like hur."
My entire life hangs on that one admission. At fifty-nine I can clearly see that she made it her life's mission to make sure I never enjoyed the love and blessings that she had. While she was not allowed to do housework or wash clothes I was put in a straight chair, on my knees, propped up against the sink and forced to wash dishes at five years old. My hands were so tiny that the large slippery plates would just slide out of my little hands and crash onto the floor. I soon learned how to develop a much tighter grip. She beat me miserably. "Fa every f****** plate you break, fa every f***** glass I am going to beat the f****** dog s**** out of you nigga! You black muthaf***** nigga! You ain't s**** You luddle black heifah!"
It's kind'a funny. Out of all the horrible names she called me "luddle black heifah" hurt the most. At five years old I did not know what a heifer was. I knew that I didn't like the sound of it.
Not only did she have me washing dishes I had to wash s**** baby diapers. Her baby's nasty diapers. She taught me well. I learned how to unroll the diaper in the toilet and slosh it around in the toilet bowl with my bare hands. I had to slosh and flush at the same time . When all of the fecal matter had disappeared, when the diaper was white again I had to wring it out and put it in the diaper bucket. For every diaper that I let slip, that got away from me and flushed down the toilet she beat me unmercifully again. As disgusting as that was, nothing prepared me for what was to come. Her little sex games with her husband. I guess they didn't have any sex toys in 1956.
There must be at least a thousand more terrible incidents that I suffered at her hands over the course of my life. It is all in my book.
I have a message! I have a cross to bear. I will save little children. I will expose pedophiles.
Children please hear! "FEAR NO MAN"
Do not cower in silence because you do not want to be embarrassed. Do not hide because you are ashamed. Love and trust The Living LORD! He will open doors that no man can close.
Work out you own salvation. Study your Bible. Pray for the indwelling of His Holy Spirit.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Friday, December 10, 2010
I Trust GOD
I trust God, that is all I can do. My grandfather told me that Jesus would fix it. I know He will.
It is all in divine order. God is working it out. I pray justice and mercy over your life.
The world is in trouble. Too many people are blind and wrong. Most of us are cowards. Dear Lord give me the strength to withstand rebuke and scandal. Prop me up Lord on every leaning side. Give me a voice Lord! Give your people ears Lord.
Save our children Lord. Save our children from vile reprobates that ruin and destroy them.
Help us to love one another Lord.
Touch and bless every child Lord. Heal every broken heart. Teach them to trust in you Lord.
Dear children do what you can to make some child's life brighter, happier.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
It is all in divine order. God is working it out. I pray justice and mercy over your life.
The world is in trouble. Too many people are blind and wrong. Most of us are cowards. Dear Lord give me the strength to withstand rebuke and scandal. Prop me up Lord on every leaning side. Give me a voice Lord! Give your people ears Lord.
Save our children Lord. Save our children from vile reprobates that ruin and destroy them.
Help us to love one another Lord.
Touch and bless every child Lord. Heal every broken heart. Teach them to trust in you Lord.
Dear children do what you can to make some child's life brighter, happier.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
"Behold, How Good and How Pleasant!"
"Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious ointment upon the head, that ran down upon the beard, even Aaron's beard: that went down to the skirts of his garments;" Psalm 133: 1-2
God knew that it would be hard for His children to dwell together in harmony on this earth. That is why He commanded us to "love ye one another." He told us to love one another out of a pure heart.
Why is that so hard children? Because of disobedience. If you do not have a disobedient nature, if you love and trust the Lord with all of your heart like you say you do then you are truly blessed.
Let me try to save your life in a few quick easy steps.
#1 Don't lie! Just don't lie period. Do not excuse your lies by saying "I wuz just keeping them out of my business." Be honest. It is a commandment don't lie. Stop lying to yourself. You know why that man left you. You know why all of your lovers and husbands headed for the hills. You know why your children shun you.
#2 Don't plot. Do not design perfect little schemes and scams no matter how smart they make you look.
#3 Do not envy. Look in the mirror, count your blessings and love yourself.
#4 Do repent. If you mess around and acquire a legion of demons in your ignorance, be quick to rebuke them. Rebuke the devil. Rebuke him for lying to you and fooling you.
#5 Do apologize. Be a woman. Own your madness and mistakes. Say that you are sorry and mean it. You see where pretending and guile have gotten you.
#6 Do bend your knees, seek GOD, seek His face. Pray for mercy. Pray and fast without ceasing until you come through.
#7 Do trust God! Trust the Lord Jesus Christ with your life, with your soul. Be a blessing. Help your little granddaughters, don't hinder them. Tell your daughter that you are sorry, that you didn't mean it. Tell her that you have been burdened with this awful demon your entire life.
#8 Do fall in love with what is right. When given a choice, choose rightly. Ask GOD to guide your heart.
#9 Do make amends. If there is something that you can fix that you messed up, do so.
#10 Listen to all the songs on my blog and have "Church" right where you are!
Do what you must MJ, fare thee well.
God knew that it would be hard for His children to dwell together in harmony on this earth. That is why He commanded us to "love ye one another." He told us to love one another out of a pure heart.
Why is that so hard children? Because of disobedience. If you do not have a disobedient nature, if you love and trust the Lord with all of your heart like you say you do then you are truly blessed.
Let me try to save your life in a few quick easy steps.
#1 Don't lie! Just don't lie period. Do not excuse your lies by saying "I wuz just keeping them out of my business." Be honest. It is a commandment don't lie. Stop lying to yourself. You know why that man left you. You know why all of your lovers and husbands headed for the hills. You know why your children shun you.
#2 Don't plot. Do not design perfect little schemes and scams no matter how smart they make you look.
#3 Do not envy. Look in the mirror, count your blessings and love yourself.
#4 Do repent. If you mess around and acquire a legion of demons in your ignorance, be quick to rebuke them. Rebuke the devil. Rebuke him for lying to you and fooling you.
#5 Do apologize. Be a woman. Own your madness and mistakes. Say that you are sorry and mean it. You see where pretending and guile have gotten you.
#6 Do bend your knees, seek GOD, seek His face. Pray for mercy. Pray and fast without ceasing until you come through.
#7 Do trust God! Trust the Lord Jesus Christ with your life, with your soul. Be a blessing. Help your little granddaughters, don't hinder them. Tell your daughter that you are sorry, that you didn't mean it. Tell her that you have been burdened with this awful demon your entire life.
#8 Do fall in love with what is right. When given a choice, choose rightly. Ask GOD to guide your heart.
#9 Do make amends. If there is something that you can fix that you messed up, do so.
#10 Listen to all the songs on my blog and have "Church" right where you are!
Do what you must MJ, fare thee well.
At Your WORD Lord!
"THIS PEOPLE DRAWETH NIGH UNTO ME WITH THEIR MOUTH, AND HONOURETH ME WITH THEIR LIPS; BUT THEIR HEART IS FAR FROM ME. BUT IN VAIN THEY DO WORSHIP ME, TEACHING FOR DOCTRINES THE COMMANDMENTS OF MEN." (Matthew 15:8-9)
Jesus knew, all of the prophets knew. Why don't the masses know? They are blind and won't see, deaf and can't hear. They have no faith. How can you believe in something pure and good when you have no goodness in you?
Too many people believe that we live in a dog-eat-dog world and they have to get theirs. Selfish, corrupt and raging with hatred and jealousy they skulk and slither, seeking to destroy.
If that's you, if that's your pattern, stop where you are and pray. Ask GOD to come into your heart. Ask Him to blot out your iniquities. Repent of your sins. Make restitution. Live righteously, live holy so that you can finally feel good about yourself.
When you make a mistake be quick to recognize it. Be quick to repent. Give up your thug mentality. Just because most people will let you bully and intimidate them that doesn't mean that you are right.
You know all of that. But you are too stubborn, too stiff necked, to love the Lord out of a pure heart. You've been wrong so long you don't know how to get right. You thought preaching would change you. You were not preaching, you were performing, demanding adulation. Somebody knows, somebody sees, somebody has sense enough to be ashamed of you. Instead of changing, instead of correcting your behavior you crucified the messenger.
If you can't do it. You can't do it. But accusing the whole world of lying on you will not work. It is a shameful disgusting life that you have lived. No you can't undo it but you can renounce it, you can humble yourself and ask for forgiveness.
"...they brought unto Him many that were possessed with devils: and he cast out the spirits with His WORD," (Matthew8:16)
"He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned." (Matthew 16:16)
Some how I know that I am wasting my time and my breath. "Oh ye of little faith."
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Jesus knew, all of the prophets knew. Why don't the masses know? They are blind and won't see, deaf and can't hear. They have no faith. How can you believe in something pure and good when you have no goodness in you?
Too many people believe that we live in a dog-eat-dog world and they have to get theirs. Selfish, corrupt and raging with hatred and jealousy they skulk and slither, seeking to destroy.
If that's you, if that's your pattern, stop where you are and pray. Ask GOD to come into your heart. Ask Him to blot out your iniquities. Repent of your sins. Make restitution. Live righteously, live holy so that you can finally feel good about yourself.
When you make a mistake be quick to recognize it. Be quick to repent. Give up your thug mentality. Just because most people will let you bully and intimidate them that doesn't mean that you are right.
You know all of that. But you are too stubborn, too stiff necked, to love the Lord out of a pure heart. You've been wrong so long you don't know how to get right. You thought preaching would change you. You were not preaching, you were performing, demanding adulation. Somebody knows, somebody sees, somebody has sense enough to be ashamed of you. Instead of changing, instead of correcting your behavior you crucified the messenger.
If you can't do it. You can't do it. But accusing the whole world of lying on you will not work. It is a shameful disgusting life that you have lived. No you can't undo it but you can renounce it, you can humble yourself and ask for forgiveness.
"...they brought unto Him many that were possessed with devils: and he cast out the spirits with His WORD," (Matthew8:16)
"He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned." (Matthew 16:16)
Some how I know that I am wasting my time and my breath. "Oh ye of little faith."
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, December 9, 2010
What It Is
It is the most bizarre story I ever heard of. It is incredulous. It is disgusting! Most importantly it is true.
A careful analysis of my life reveals her to be the best thing that could have happened to me.
This is a cautionary tale for would be narcissistic demons. My like is proof that every prophetic Word in the Bible is true.
It is a shocking revelation to discover that most people do not have the courage, character or faith that they claim to have.
This woman gave birth to six children, six children that she has tormented in various ways their entire lives. Although I am concerned with how she has impacted and ruined their lives and families I will respect their privacy and permit them to keep their secrets.
I thank God every day, every hour, for revealing this hideous whore for what she really is, a Demon!
I am astonished to know that a woman of such great intellect and beauty could allow herself to become the sickest, vilest reprobate known to man.
If you can, please pray for her, please pray for me, please pray for my family.
I struggle with her duality. I am messed up! I recognize and understand what it is, I just can't understand why.
Her sexual perversion is rare and extreme. Her selfishness is ridiculously over the top. Her treachery is brilliant.
My entire family is hopelessly weak and impotent. Not one person in my entire family has the courage to confront her. I understand. It took me fifty-eight years to even inquire about my molestation. I pray that GOD will bless and strengthen my family. May they finally hear and understand the words; "Fear no man!"
I have begged her to repent. Just like the Bible says I only got a blot. It is not going to happen and I understand why. How can anyone confess and say they are sorry for something that they are actually proud of? She delights in her guile and creepy demonism.
She will not have it both ways in my life. She will pay. GOD said it, I didn't. I am the messenger but I have been labeled the fool. Some of my brothers remain silent because this crook has promised them money in her will. I will not sell my soul for a mess of pottage. She has no money! The woman has a house note! The expectation of five or ten thousand dollars is not worth the humiliation and degradation you must suffer to abide her.
How a brilliant woman can be as ignorant and primitively depraved is beyond my ability to comprehend.
She sickens me. She is a sickening embarrassment, but she is my mother. I did what I could to save her, to love her. It is hopeless.
My blog is a warning. If your eight year old daughter gets raped three times the way my mother claims she did. Get your child some help. If your child mutilates and murders animals, get them some help. But if your child grows up to be a violent criminal, put them in jail. No matter what, always stand up to them. Don't let them bully and intimidate you.
Your homework for today is 2 Chronicles 7:14
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love,Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
A careful analysis of my life reveals her to be the best thing that could have happened to me.
This is a cautionary tale for would be narcissistic demons. My like is proof that every prophetic Word in the Bible is true.
It is a shocking revelation to discover that most people do not have the courage, character or faith that they claim to have.
This woman gave birth to six children, six children that she has tormented in various ways their entire lives. Although I am concerned with how she has impacted and ruined their lives and families I will respect their privacy and permit them to keep their secrets.
I thank God every day, every hour, for revealing this hideous whore for what she really is, a Demon!
I am astonished to know that a woman of such great intellect and beauty could allow herself to become the sickest, vilest reprobate known to man.
If you can, please pray for her, please pray for me, please pray for my family.
I struggle with her duality. I am messed up! I recognize and understand what it is, I just can't understand why.
Her sexual perversion is rare and extreme. Her selfishness is ridiculously over the top. Her treachery is brilliant.
My entire family is hopelessly weak and impotent. Not one person in my entire family has the courage to confront her. I understand. It took me fifty-eight years to even inquire about my molestation. I pray that GOD will bless and strengthen my family. May they finally hear and understand the words; "Fear no man!"
I have begged her to repent. Just like the Bible says I only got a blot. It is not going to happen and I understand why. How can anyone confess and say they are sorry for something that they are actually proud of? She delights in her guile and creepy demonism.
She will not have it both ways in my life. She will pay. GOD said it, I didn't. I am the messenger but I have been labeled the fool. Some of my brothers remain silent because this crook has promised them money in her will. I will not sell my soul for a mess of pottage. She has no money! The woman has a house note! The expectation of five or ten thousand dollars is not worth the humiliation and degradation you must suffer to abide her.
How a brilliant woman can be as ignorant and primitively depraved is beyond my ability to comprehend.
She sickens me. She is a sickening embarrassment, but she is my mother. I did what I could to save her, to love her. It is hopeless.
My blog is a warning. If your eight year old daughter gets raped three times the way my mother claims she did. Get your child some help. If your child mutilates and murders animals, get them some help. But if your child grows up to be a violent criminal, put them in jail. No matter what, always stand up to them. Don't let them bully and intimidate you.
Your homework for today is 2 Chronicles 7:14
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love,Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
I Will Not Be Held To A Lower Standard!
"On a sunny day in 1996, 9-year old Leila Fathi was picking wildflowers with her cousin near her family's village in northwest Iran when three men crept up behind her. Pinning her arms to her back, they dragged her, kicking and thrashing, to the edge of a nearby cliff. As her cousin, hidden behind a tree, watched in terror, the men tore off Leila'a skirt and raped her, then struck her in the head and tossed her lifeless body over the cliff."
You can find that article in The Oprah Magazine ( "Why Is Shirin Ebadi Still Risking Her Life?" May 2006)
I can't say I was shocked when I read that article, I was enlightened. "In Iran such crimes rarely make it to the courtroom." Why? For the same reason all over the world. Most people are held captive by fear and shame. "Don't bring shame on the family."; is an unwritten rule in every culture. It is particularly prevalent in Black families.
Well I know better. The Holy Bible warns us repeatedly, yet demons persist in their evil debauchery.
"Know ye the TRUTH! and the TRUTH shall set you free!"
What is the truth? The truth is that too many vile creatures live among us and with us and we cover for them. We don't tell because we don't want to be embarrassed. We don't want to bring shame on the family. Well I've got news for you. That pervert has already brought shame on the family. The entire family has become accursed because of their selfish lust and lies.
Don't you dare shed one tear for that pervert. Sympathy is the precise reason they do what they do. Sympathy and fear. If they can't endear your sympathy they will assault you with a foul mouth or remind you of their great ability to work "roots".
What I find most intriguing and universal is the supreme selfishness of demons. They are so selfish that human compassion is beyond their ability to grasp. They have an idea of what it is. They know what words to say. They know how to act when someone is looking. It is when you are not looking that they do their dirt. No they don't pick everyone. These demons do have a code of ethics. Violate the little black snooty nose raggedy ass motherless child.
Every one knows that is last place. There is no place lower in society. Some of you may have found yourself there. It is a lonely place. What could be worse than being motherless? Having a mother that pretends to be your mother just so she can violate you over and over. Having a brilliant monster of a mother that the whole world fears. Having a mother that will give you a stone or a serpent instead of bread or a fish. People I want you to know that that kind of evil is rare but it does exist.
It is a silent epidemic. Child predators are running rampant on this earth. Frightened little Christians sit on the side lines and watch in silence waiting on Jesus, waiting on someone else to speak up. The saddest reality is that most people really do not care. Shame on you America.
Thank you LORD for working a miracle in my life. Thank you for saving me from that demon. Thank you for your protection and divine guidance. Thank you for my cross. "I bear my cross daily."
In 1951 a very selfish wayward woman gave birth to me begrudgingly. Why? You will have to ask her. At any rate I got here. I thank God for my life. That same woman told me repeatedly, over and over; "I gave your black ass away!" Why would any woman lacerate their own child with that kind of information? Destruction. Too cheap to abort me she tried to destroy me a thousand times over. Through the miraculous power of the Holy Ghost GOD has turned all of her schemes and scams into triumph for me. Praise the LORD!
Thank you LORD! I will do it. I will save as many innocent children as I can. I will shine a spot light on this plague.
Since the beginning of time the poor child, the poor little bastard, the poor little black bastard female has been fair game for all predators. Shame on them and shame on the people that let them.
"Well I came by to tell you"; that I am not a poor little black bastard female. I am a child of Our Most High GOD! I am a child of the King! I was a princess and now I am a Queen.
You will not mistreat me because of my color black. You will not revile me and slander my name. I will stand by myself! I will call out all demons! I will tell!
Vile men and women stop dead in your tracks. "Ye shall proceed no further!"
"And ye shall be hated of all men for my name's sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved."..."Fear them not therefore; for there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed; and hid, that shall not be known. What I tell you in darkness, that speak ye in light: and what ye hear in the ear, that preach ye upon the housetops."
Praise The LORD children! Thank Him for His Holy Word and divine guidance. Meet Him on your knees children. Today's assignment is Matthew 10.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
You can find that article in The Oprah Magazine ( "Why Is Shirin Ebadi Still Risking Her Life?" May 2006)
I can't say I was shocked when I read that article, I was enlightened. "In Iran such crimes rarely make it to the courtroom." Why? For the same reason all over the world. Most people are held captive by fear and shame. "Don't bring shame on the family."; is an unwritten rule in every culture. It is particularly prevalent in Black families.
Well I know better. The Holy Bible warns us repeatedly, yet demons persist in their evil debauchery.
"Know ye the TRUTH! and the TRUTH shall set you free!"
What is the truth? The truth is that too many vile creatures live among us and with us and we cover for them. We don't tell because we don't want to be embarrassed. We don't want to bring shame on the family. Well I've got news for you. That pervert has already brought shame on the family. The entire family has become accursed because of their selfish lust and lies.
Don't you dare shed one tear for that pervert. Sympathy is the precise reason they do what they do. Sympathy and fear. If they can't endear your sympathy they will assault you with a foul mouth or remind you of their great ability to work "roots".
What I find most intriguing and universal is the supreme selfishness of demons. They are so selfish that human compassion is beyond their ability to grasp. They have an idea of what it is. They know what words to say. They know how to act when someone is looking. It is when you are not looking that they do their dirt. No they don't pick everyone. These demons do have a code of ethics. Violate the little black snooty nose raggedy ass motherless child.
Every one knows that is last place. There is no place lower in society. Some of you may have found yourself there. It is a lonely place. What could be worse than being motherless? Having a mother that pretends to be your mother just so she can violate you over and over. Having a brilliant monster of a mother that the whole world fears. Having a mother that will give you a stone or a serpent instead of bread or a fish. People I want you to know that that kind of evil is rare but it does exist.
It is a silent epidemic. Child predators are running rampant on this earth. Frightened little Christians sit on the side lines and watch in silence waiting on Jesus, waiting on someone else to speak up. The saddest reality is that most people really do not care. Shame on you America.
Thank you LORD for working a miracle in my life. Thank you for saving me from that demon. Thank you for your protection and divine guidance. Thank you for my cross. "I bear my cross daily."
In 1951 a very selfish wayward woman gave birth to me begrudgingly. Why? You will have to ask her. At any rate I got here. I thank God for my life. That same woman told me repeatedly, over and over; "I gave your black ass away!" Why would any woman lacerate their own child with that kind of information? Destruction. Too cheap to abort me she tried to destroy me a thousand times over. Through the miraculous power of the Holy Ghost GOD has turned all of her schemes and scams into triumph for me. Praise the LORD!
Thank you LORD! I will do it. I will save as many innocent children as I can. I will shine a spot light on this plague.
Since the beginning of time the poor child, the poor little bastard, the poor little black bastard female has been fair game for all predators. Shame on them and shame on the people that let them.
"Well I came by to tell you"; that I am not a poor little black bastard female. I am a child of Our Most High GOD! I am a child of the King! I was a princess and now I am a Queen.
You will not mistreat me because of my color black. You will not revile me and slander my name. I will stand by myself! I will call out all demons! I will tell!
Vile men and women stop dead in your tracks. "Ye shall proceed no further!"
"And ye shall be hated of all men for my name's sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved."..."Fear them not therefore; for there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed; and hid, that shall not be known. What I tell you in darkness, that speak ye in light: and what ye hear in the ear, that preach ye upon the housetops."
Praise The LORD children! Thank Him for His Holy Word and divine guidance. Meet Him on your knees children. Today's assignment is Matthew 10.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
An Open Letter To My Birth Mother
I bid you farewell. I am sorry that I can't say a fond farewell. You get on down the road now, get away from me. Get! Run! Be gone. Take all of your miscreants and minions with you.
I am going to take a few minutes to tell you what you have refused to acknowledge for eighty-five years. First of all you are a reckless reprobate, a hopeless whore, a pathological liar, a sick narcissist and an embarrassment. Yes you embarrass me and you always have. You humbled me, striped me of all pride. You left me with nothing but tales of my miraculous escape.
How you ended up the despicable demon that you are is not nearly as important as the fact that you have been so successful for your entire life. Successful? so you think.
You only succeeded in proving all of Wade Station right. They said you were common. Where did they get that idea? What kind of acts did you commit that would divide a community? What kind of gall and guile do you have to cause you to believe that you are unstoppable. Yes you are inconceivable, unfathomable. But I want you to know that you are stoppable. You've got to move. When the Lord gets ready you have to move!
You are real. You are not an aberration. You are a full blow demon. Is there any hope for you? God only knows.
I do want to take the time to attempt to explain some Biblical prophesy to you. Not so much for you but for future reprobates. I hope your wasted life can help some poor wayward young lady to turn from her wicked ways.
"He said a liar would not tarry in His sight!" you would scream for hours. I took it to heart. I've always prided myself in being an honest person. I didn't know that was a ploy. I didn't know that was an instrument to be used against me. You made us catch that bus every Sunday morning to go to Sunday school. We attended church every Sunday! We sat in church all day long on Sunday. I loved it. I won all of the little pewter fish that the chaplain gave out on the post. You sat in your pew every Sunday "Amening" and praising the Lord. I believed you. I didn't know that you were putting on, faking. I didn't know it was to be used as a tool for your manipulation.
Yes you are extremely manipulative, expert, in fact you are perfect. But let me tell you where you messed up. You tried to manipulate God. You foolish, foolish woman. Do you really think your little "goofer dust" has any power? Do you think your little pea brain can out think GOD?
GOD dulled your understanding "preacher". If you had read your Bible instead of crawling up into some one's pulpit to show off and be seen you would have come to the realization that you really need Christ in your life. The words ;"...lean not to your own understanding." would have registered. Maybe you would have prayed for the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.
True, in Wade your intelligence and graft were very impressive to some. There were some people that you never fooled. But clueless and prideful you pressed right on with your cruelty and decadence. Now in your advanced age you are caught in your own craftiness. Don't give me that crap that you are blessed because you are old. And don't tell me to "honor thy mother and father so might your days be lengthened." You murdered your father and you are still here. I want you to know that you are not here because GOD blessed you. You are here for GOD's own purpose.
Now that you are caught in your own craftiness, now that the 35TH Psalm is being revealed through you, what are you going to do? Yes that's right, the pit you dug for me, you're in.
Can you bend one knee? Can you stretch one hand? Can you humble yourself and squeeze out one "I'm sorry"?
Fare thee well Mathy Jane.
To all my readers; "Look well to your going", "Fear no man", Love the Lord with all of your heart. Be kind and loving to one another.
"Though hand join in hand, the wicked shall not be unpunished: but the seed of the righteous shall be delivered." Proverbs 11: 21-22
I am the seed of Abraham. I am the seed of Jerome Walters a righteous man. PRAISE THE LORD!!!THANK YOU JESUS!!!
Be a blessing and be Blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I am going to take a few minutes to tell you what you have refused to acknowledge for eighty-five years. First of all you are a reckless reprobate, a hopeless whore, a pathological liar, a sick narcissist and an embarrassment. Yes you embarrass me and you always have. You humbled me, striped me of all pride. You left me with nothing but tales of my miraculous escape.
How you ended up the despicable demon that you are is not nearly as important as the fact that you have been so successful for your entire life. Successful? so you think.
You only succeeded in proving all of Wade Station right. They said you were common. Where did they get that idea? What kind of acts did you commit that would divide a community? What kind of gall and guile do you have to cause you to believe that you are unstoppable. Yes you are inconceivable, unfathomable. But I want you to know that you are stoppable. You've got to move. When the Lord gets ready you have to move!
You are real. You are not an aberration. You are a full blow demon. Is there any hope for you? God only knows.
I do want to take the time to attempt to explain some Biblical prophesy to you. Not so much for you but for future reprobates. I hope your wasted life can help some poor wayward young lady to turn from her wicked ways.
"He said a liar would not tarry in His sight!" you would scream for hours. I took it to heart. I've always prided myself in being an honest person. I didn't know that was a ploy. I didn't know that was an instrument to be used against me. You made us catch that bus every Sunday morning to go to Sunday school. We attended church every Sunday! We sat in church all day long on Sunday. I loved it. I won all of the little pewter fish that the chaplain gave out on the post. You sat in your pew every Sunday "Amening" and praising the Lord. I believed you. I didn't know that you were putting on, faking. I didn't know it was to be used as a tool for your manipulation.
Yes you are extremely manipulative, expert, in fact you are perfect. But let me tell you where you messed up. You tried to manipulate God. You foolish, foolish woman. Do you really think your little "goofer dust" has any power? Do you think your little pea brain can out think GOD?
GOD dulled your understanding "preacher". If you had read your Bible instead of crawling up into some one's pulpit to show off and be seen you would have come to the realization that you really need Christ in your life. The words ;"...lean not to your own understanding." would have registered. Maybe you would have prayed for the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.
True, in Wade your intelligence and graft were very impressive to some. There were some people that you never fooled. But clueless and prideful you pressed right on with your cruelty and decadence. Now in your advanced age you are caught in your own craftiness. Don't give me that crap that you are blessed because you are old. And don't tell me to "honor thy mother and father so might your days be lengthened." You murdered your father and you are still here. I want you to know that you are not here because GOD blessed you. You are here for GOD's own purpose.
Now that you are caught in your own craftiness, now that the 35TH Psalm is being revealed through you, what are you going to do? Yes that's right, the pit you dug for me, you're in.
Can you bend one knee? Can you stretch one hand? Can you humble yourself and squeeze out one "I'm sorry"?
Fare thee well Mathy Jane.
To all my readers; "Look well to your going", "Fear no man", Love the Lord with all of your heart. Be kind and loving to one another.
"Though hand join in hand, the wicked shall not be unpunished: but the seed of the righteous shall be delivered." Proverbs 11: 21-22
I am the seed of Abraham. I am the seed of Jerome Walters a righteous man. PRAISE THE LORD!!!THANK YOU JESUS!!!
Be a blessing and be Blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Monday, December 6, 2010
I Will Tell You What I Don't Want!
"I'll tell you what I don't want!" Lois screamed at her sister Eunice. Frozen by the shocking anger in her poor sick sister's voice Eunice stood still, afraid to move.
All night long Eunice held vigil at her sister's bedside praying. Praying for God to heal her younger sister of this ravenous cancer that racked her tiny little body.
"Dear Lord heal my sister if it be thy will!...Come by here Lord! somebody needs you! 'they brought unto him many that were possessed with devils: and He cast out the spirits with His Word, and healed all that were sick'...at Your Word LAWD! at Your Word Lawd!...Dear Lord heal my sister...Heal hur Lawd!"
At your Word, at Your Word kept resonating, kept ricocheting in Eunice's head.
She knew that GOD could and would heal Lois if Lois just had a little bit of faith.
These two spinster sisters had lived a very lonely, extremely isolated existence for many years.
They were the odd ball retired school teachers. Their double wide trailer lay hidden behind sixty-five acres of tall Georgia pines. They had a well stocked fishing pond, an apple orchard, a plum orchard. They didn't have any peaches because Lois didn't like them. Lois was only one year Eunice's junior but she was clearly the Alpha dog in that relationship.
Eunice studied and read her Bible every day. There had never been a morning that Eunice wasn't down on her knees at 7:27 in the morning praying to GOD, thanking God and speaking in tongue. Eunice went down to the little Apostolic Church every Sunday. Lois would not go. She refused to have any part in organized religion. Lois was religious but very wary of the "Church". Church membership and church attendance didn't impress her.
"What are you going to do when you die?" Eunice used to plead.
"Let my scent bury me I don't care! Shit I'll be dead!"
"Watch your language!" Eunice sternly admonished.
"Shitshitshitshitshitshitshitshit! So I said Shit...Who gives a shit?"
"The Bible says you shouldn't curse."
"That's not the kind of cursing the Bible is talking about nigga. God warned us not to curse people with our negative comments, not to bring bad things on them. I don't know how many times I have to tell you that."
Eunice could not imagine life without Lois. Lois was her sister and best friend. In many ways they were fraternal twins. If one ached the other ached. It was as if they shared the same brain. Ravenous readers, books and magazines filled every room of their double wide, including the kitchen. Lois was the scientist and Eunice was the philosopher.
Both were very prejudice. Both hated vacuous people of low intelligence. Stupidity enraged them. Do not utter evidence of your lack of understanding around them. They would let you have it with both barrels.
"I care about children that look like me." the PTA volunteer crowed. Lois lit into her like a mother hen; "Well I love and look out for all children! I don't care what they look like. There is only one race, the Human Race! Do you think God has a preference for a particular race? He is Our Father not Their Father! We are all the same. Color is only skin deep. IT IS CHARACTER!"
The poor lady walked away stunned , angry and embarrassed.
Lois didn't care. No one liked her anyway. They called her a rabble-rouser, a trouble maker. A Nut!
"Man does not do what is right, he does what is convenient."
"What does that mean Miss Walters?" the little ninth grader begged to know.
"It means that men selfishly look out for themselves. That's why you all only get 21 minutes to cram down a greasy not fit for human consumption lunch. You are forced to stand in line for at least fifteen minutes. I am appalled! The principal and Cafeteria manager should be strung up! Cardboard pizza served with canned corn, powered mashed potatoes served with french fries!"
"O.K Miss Walters we get! Why don't you do something about it?"
"Me? Why should I? I bring my lunch and I am a teacher and I don't have to stand in line."
"You teachers don't care about nobody but yourselves?"
"Look I've been down that road. I ended up homeless fighting for student's rights. They sent me notes and their parents sent me notes telling me how they agreed with me and prayed for me. No one, NO ONE stood with me. You can't lead a revolution by yourself. I refuse to go down that road again. You want better lunches and better treatment, you demand it. I think that's why so many black people are still slaves. Somebody else fought for their freedom. We don't have any science books. Shit we don't even have a lab. You don't care now. Your parents don't care now but they will . They will care when you can't pass the graduation test in Science. You think you are getting over because the county will not let me fail you. You are actually glad to not have a text book."
"I ain't gon read it noway!"
"Why? Why don't you want to read it?"
"It's boring...you don't make it fun,"
"Shit! what do you want a lap dance? Some subjects are just boring but the GHSGT is hard. You can pay me now or pay me later."
"That test is not that hard. My cousin passed it."
"Have you taken it?"
"No."
"Then shut up and stop spreading ignorance!"
"Miss Walters you're rude."
"I'm not rude I'm pissed."
"Why don't you retire?"
"Baby that is exactly what I am going to do. Later for this nigga factory. I can not in good conscience continue to rob you of a decent education just because you and your parents don't know the difference."
Inequality perpetuated by a black school superintendent and a majority black school board was not the only thing that plagued Lois. She was stalked by a demon. They both were. The demon pretended to be a loving mother. Their demon mother preached every Sunday and laughed. The Bitch was old, near ninety and nowhere near death. In fact she was healthier than both of them. Lois hated her. Eunice prayed for her. Lois refused to part her lips to her. Eunice was kind and entreating, took her abuse and cried.
This old bitch was truly a witch. A "root working" sorcerer, a vile "voodoo" priestess.
The more Lois told people, the more she tried to alert her relatives the more they reviled her.
Lois felt that GOD had abandoned her for letting this succubus live her closeted clandestine life for so long.
Eunice knew that God would fix it in His own time in His own way.
*************************************************************************************
When I was a little girl I made the sad mistake of telling my mother that I wanted to be a teacher and a writer, a published author. Only through the goodness of GOD I managed to become a teacher. She never gave me one red cent but somehow she managed to drive a brand new Cadillac. When you grow up abused you become conditioned and accept abuse. Every thing I ever wrote she destroyed. Yes she laid me low. I was devastated to discover that she never changed. She is still Madame Watson the "root worker". But she shall go no further. Her time is up. Tell my friends and family that I am rising, I am healing.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
All night long Eunice held vigil at her sister's bedside praying. Praying for God to heal her younger sister of this ravenous cancer that racked her tiny little body.
"Dear Lord heal my sister if it be thy will!...Come by here Lord! somebody needs you! 'they brought unto him many that were possessed with devils: and He cast out the spirits with His Word, and healed all that were sick'...at Your Word LAWD! at Your Word Lawd!...Dear Lord heal my sister...Heal hur Lawd!"
At your Word, at Your Word kept resonating, kept ricocheting in Eunice's head.
She knew that GOD could and would heal Lois if Lois just had a little bit of faith.
These two spinster sisters had lived a very lonely, extremely isolated existence for many years.
They were the odd ball retired school teachers. Their double wide trailer lay hidden behind sixty-five acres of tall Georgia pines. They had a well stocked fishing pond, an apple orchard, a plum orchard. They didn't have any peaches because Lois didn't like them. Lois was only one year Eunice's junior but she was clearly the Alpha dog in that relationship.
Eunice studied and read her Bible every day. There had never been a morning that Eunice wasn't down on her knees at 7:27 in the morning praying to GOD, thanking God and speaking in tongue. Eunice went down to the little Apostolic Church every Sunday. Lois would not go. She refused to have any part in organized religion. Lois was religious but very wary of the "Church". Church membership and church attendance didn't impress her.
"What are you going to do when you die?" Eunice used to plead.
"Let my scent bury me I don't care! Shit I'll be dead!"
"Watch your language!" Eunice sternly admonished.
"Shitshitshitshitshitshitshitshit! So I said Shit...Who gives a shit?"
"The Bible says you shouldn't curse."
"That's not the kind of cursing the Bible is talking about nigga. God warned us not to curse people with our negative comments, not to bring bad things on them. I don't know how many times I have to tell you that."
Eunice could not imagine life without Lois. Lois was her sister and best friend. In many ways they were fraternal twins. If one ached the other ached. It was as if they shared the same brain. Ravenous readers, books and magazines filled every room of their double wide, including the kitchen. Lois was the scientist and Eunice was the philosopher.
Both were very prejudice. Both hated vacuous people of low intelligence. Stupidity enraged them. Do not utter evidence of your lack of understanding around them. They would let you have it with both barrels.
"I care about children that look like me." the PTA volunteer crowed. Lois lit into her like a mother hen; "Well I love and look out for all children! I don't care what they look like. There is only one race, the Human Race! Do you think God has a preference for a particular race? He is Our Father not Their Father! We are all the same. Color is only skin deep. IT IS CHARACTER!"
The poor lady walked away stunned , angry and embarrassed.
Lois didn't care. No one liked her anyway. They called her a rabble-rouser, a trouble maker. A Nut!
"Man does not do what is right, he does what is convenient."
"What does that mean Miss Walters?" the little ninth grader begged to know.
"It means that men selfishly look out for themselves. That's why you all only get 21 minutes to cram down a greasy not fit for human consumption lunch. You are forced to stand in line for at least fifteen minutes. I am appalled! The principal and Cafeteria manager should be strung up! Cardboard pizza served with canned corn, powered mashed potatoes served with french fries!"
"O.K Miss Walters we get! Why don't you do something about it?"
"Me? Why should I? I bring my lunch and I am a teacher and I don't have to stand in line."
"You teachers don't care about nobody but yourselves?"
"Look I've been down that road. I ended up homeless fighting for student's rights. They sent me notes and their parents sent me notes telling me how they agreed with me and prayed for me. No one, NO ONE stood with me. You can't lead a revolution by yourself. I refuse to go down that road again. You want better lunches and better treatment, you demand it. I think that's why so many black people are still slaves. Somebody else fought for their freedom. We don't have any science books. Shit we don't even have a lab. You don't care now. Your parents don't care now but they will . They will care when you can't pass the graduation test in Science. You think you are getting over because the county will not let me fail you. You are actually glad to not have a text book."
"I ain't gon read it noway!"
"Why? Why don't you want to read it?"
"It's boring...you don't make it fun,"
"Shit! what do you want a lap dance? Some subjects are just boring but the GHSGT is hard. You can pay me now or pay me later."
"That test is not that hard. My cousin passed it."
"Have you taken it?"
"No."
"Then shut up and stop spreading ignorance!"
"Miss Walters you're rude."
"I'm not rude I'm pissed."
"Why don't you retire?"
"Baby that is exactly what I am going to do. Later for this nigga factory. I can not in good conscience continue to rob you of a decent education just because you and your parents don't know the difference."
Inequality perpetuated by a black school superintendent and a majority black school board was not the only thing that plagued Lois. She was stalked by a demon. They both were. The demon pretended to be a loving mother. Their demon mother preached every Sunday and laughed. The Bitch was old, near ninety and nowhere near death. In fact she was healthier than both of them. Lois hated her. Eunice prayed for her. Lois refused to part her lips to her. Eunice was kind and entreating, took her abuse and cried.
This old bitch was truly a witch. A "root working" sorcerer, a vile "voodoo" priestess.
The more Lois told people, the more she tried to alert her relatives the more they reviled her.
Lois felt that GOD had abandoned her for letting this succubus live her closeted clandestine life for so long.
Eunice knew that God would fix it in His own time in His own way.
*************************************************************************************
When I was a little girl I made the sad mistake of telling my mother that I wanted to be a teacher and a writer, a published author. Only through the goodness of GOD I managed to become a teacher. She never gave me one red cent but somehow she managed to drive a brand new Cadillac. When you grow up abused you become conditioned and accept abuse. Every thing I ever wrote she destroyed. Yes she laid me low. I was devastated to discover that she never changed. She is still Madame Watson the "root worker". But she shall go no further. Her time is up. Tell my friends and family that I am rising, I am healing.
Be a Blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Friday, December 3, 2010
The Real Shocker!
What could shock a person more than discovering that their birth mother truly hated them and was no more than a sick vile Demon? Discovering that no one in this dying world gives a damn. Very few people even care. Some people give you lip service. Most people do not think you should even tell.
Who really cares about our children? Who cares about little black children? Selfish and greedy we all just look out for ourselves.
Well I am not going to stop. I am going to keep talking, keep writing, keep telling until the Almighty God sends me some one, sends a peculiar people to help save our beautiful innocent children.
I know GOD gave me a voice and a story for a reason.
I must say that I never knew that I could be so ashamed of my family, of my brothers.
Any man or woman that lives with a spirit of fear, callousness and a get over mentality is a very small person.
I pray that you find the strength to grow.
"Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Who really cares about our children? Who cares about little black children? Selfish and greedy we all just look out for ourselves.
Well I am not going to stop. I am going to keep talking, keep writing, keep telling until the Almighty God sends me some one, sends a peculiar people to help save our beautiful innocent children.
I know GOD gave me a voice and a story for a reason.
I must say that I never knew that I could be so ashamed of my family, of my brothers.
Any man or woman that lives with a spirit of fear, callousness and a get over mentality is a very small person.
I pray that you find the strength to grow.
"Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
PTL!
Praise the LORD children! Meet Him down on your knees at 7:27 in the a.m. Thank Him for blessing you, keeping you. Thank Him for wisdom and understanding. Thank Him for His WORD! Thank Him for deliverance. Thank Him for His prayer.
What an awesome God I serve.
Live in LOVE children. "Love ye one another."
Ask Him to search your heart. If He finds any sin ask Him to pluck it out.
"Defraud no man." You can't live double minded. You can't be a rank cold blooded demon and serve the LORD.
Quit fooling yourself. Quit lying to yourself. Take an assessment, take inventory. Are you living foul? Are you engaged in ignorant primitive "root working"? Come ye out from among them.
Confess your sins. Repent of your sins. Apologize! Correct the wrong you've done.
I know a poor lady that ruined her life. An obstinate rebellious miscreant. Insanely jealous and brilliantly wicked. Her incredible ignorance and jealousy is beyond human belief, beyond human comprehension. She is the worst liar in the world because she lies to herself. Her children are weak and impotent just like she made them. They are too cowardly to confront her. Too frightened of her to challenge her. They are modern day slaves waiting patiently for the evil witch to die. Some of them may just be selfish and uncaring just like their mother. God forbid that any of them are corrupt like her.
Look at the story of Joseph in Genesis. "Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colors. And when his brethren saw that their father loved him more than all his brethren, they hated him, and could not speak peaceably unto him." Genesis 31: 3-4.
The brothers were jealous of their brother's God given talents and sought to destroy Him.
This poor ignorant woman was jealous of the talents that God gave her children and sought to destroy them. Dissatisfied with her vicious mouth, cruelty and sexual deviance she teamed up with the devil. She introduced and relied on sorcery. She let the devil convince her that she had power. This woman neglected her brilliant God given talents in order to rob her own children.
Although she is a "preacher" she never heard or understood when God said "No weapon formed against you shall prosper."
Make no mistake His WORD is real, all of His Prophesies are coming to pass.
Where ever you are stretch out your hand, stretch it out toward GOD. Ask Him to come into your heart. Ask Him to open your blind eyes. Ask Him to unstop your deaf ears. Confess your sins. GOD already knows them but He can't help you if you won't let Him.
Don't you love the LORD? Have you not witnessed the miracles He wrought in me? in *Sam? Don't you know that GOD blessed you with the most wonderful father on earth? You were jealous of your own daddy you poor ignorant woman. You committed an unpardonable sin, you shed innocent blood. Yes you did. There is no denying.
It may be too late for you but it is not too late for my nieces and future generations.
Ladies do not let anyone define you or destroy you. Fight back! Stand up! Stand up and proclaim the name of Jesus Christ! Pick up your cross and follow Him. Do good. Seek GOD.
"Apart from Christ you are nothing." JR Walters.
Engrave that on your heart children. Humble yourselves, celebrate your great legacy. Do know that you come from great stock. Search the history books, search the Bible. You will find few men as wise and as gentle as my grandfather. I will not swallow that swill. You will never convince me that he took his own life. Shame on you. How dare you be so wicked, so ignorant, so depraved.
You shot a poor invalid in the heart and he was eighty-four years old because you were sick of him. You disposed of him like a bag of garbage. You treated him like you treated me, like you treated most of your children.
How can you continue to live so selfishly? So depraved?
The fantasy is over. You are no longer fun. I can no longer tolerate or abide you. I must expose you in order to save the children.
Foolish woman study your Bible. If you can, repent of one sin a day.
Rebuke Satan!
Continue in His WORD children. Pray for understanding. Pray for Peace and Love. Give Love this Christmas.
Be a blessing and be blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
What an awesome God I serve.
Live in LOVE children. "Love ye one another."
Ask Him to search your heart. If He finds any sin ask Him to pluck it out.
"Defraud no man." You can't live double minded. You can't be a rank cold blooded demon and serve the LORD.
Quit fooling yourself. Quit lying to yourself. Take an assessment, take inventory. Are you living foul? Are you engaged in ignorant primitive "root working"? Come ye out from among them.
Confess your sins. Repent of your sins. Apologize! Correct the wrong you've done.
I know a poor lady that ruined her life. An obstinate rebellious miscreant. Insanely jealous and brilliantly wicked. Her incredible ignorance and jealousy is beyond human belief, beyond human comprehension. She is the worst liar in the world because she lies to herself. Her children are weak and impotent just like she made them. They are too cowardly to confront her. Too frightened of her to challenge her. They are modern day slaves waiting patiently for the evil witch to die. Some of them may just be selfish and uncaring just like their mother. God forbid that any of them are corrupt like her.
Look at the story of Joseph in Genesis. "Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colors. And when his brethren saw that their father loved him more than all his brethren, they hated him, and could not speak peaceably unto him." Genesis 31: 3-4.
The brothers were jealous of their brother's God given talents and sought to destroy Him.
This poor ignorant woman was jealous of the talents that God gave her children and sought to destroy them. Dissatisfied with her vicious mouth, cruelty and sexual deviance she teamed up with the devil. She introduced and relied on sorcery. She let the devil convince her that she had power. This woman neglected her brilliant God given talents in order to rob her own children.
Although she is a "preacher" she never heard or understood when God said "No weapon formed against you shall prosper."
Make no mistake His WORD is real, all of His Prophesies are coming to pass.
Where ever you are stretch out your hand, stretch it out toward GOD. Ask Him to come into your heart. Ask Him to open your blind eyes. Ask Him to unstop your deaf ears. Confess your sins. GOD already knows them but He can't help you if you won't let Him.
Don't you love the LORD? Have you not witnessed the miracles He wrought in me? in *Sam? Don't you know that GOD blessed you with the most wonderful father on earth? You were jealous of your own daddy you poor ignorant woman. You committed an unpardonable sin, you shed innocent blood. Yes you did. There is no denying.
It may be too late for you but it is not too late for my nieces and future generations.
Ladies do not let anyone define you or destroy you. Fight back! Stand up! Stand up and proclaim the name of Jesus Christ! Pick up your cross and follow Him. Do good. Seek GOD.
"Apart from Christ you are nothing." JR Walters.
Engrave that on your heart children. Humble yourselves, celebrate your great legacy. Do know that you come from great stock. Search the history books, search the Bible. You will find few men as wise and as gentle as my grandfather. I will not swallow that swill. You will never convince me that he took his own life. Shame on you. How dare you be so wicked, so ignorant, so depraved.
You shot a poor invalid in the heart and he was eighty-four years old because you were sick of him. You disposed of him like a bag of garbage. You treated him like you treated me, like you treated most of your children.
How can you continue to live so selfishly? So depraved?
The fantasy is over. You are no longer fun. I can no longer tolerate or abide you. I must expose you in order to save the children.
Foolish woman study your Bible. If you can, repent of one sin a day.
Rebuke Satan!
Continue in His WORD children. Pray for understanding. Pray for Peace and Love. Give Love this Christmas.
Be a blessing and be blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, December 2, 2010
The Fear of the LORD!
"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction." Proverbs 1:7
Amen and glory to GOD. It is so simple. His Word is so easy to be entreated. But the way of the transgressor is hard.
Don't spend your time trying to save them. God told you that the only thing that you are going to get is a blot. "Cast not your pearls before swine..."
Wow! Why did God call them swine? A filthy animal. Because God knows all things and he knows that they are low life and common, human maggots capable of the most despicable acts ever imagined.
Why do these lying hypocrites get dressed up and run to the "Church" every time the doors open? To fool you, to appeal, to defraud, to set up, to laugh. There is no good in them, none.
So why does God let them live, why does He let them exist? Ask God when you see Him.
I know that I know and I thank God for his revelation without ceasing.
Thank you Lord for revealing this painful disgusting truth to me. Thank you for your Word.
I'm standing on your Word and I'm standing by myself!
Thank you for your courage Lord. Thank you for self respect. Thank you for common decency. Thank you for the ability to love and care about others.
Why any woman would give birth to six children and hate them I don't know. I know what I know. I know what I saw. I know what I lived.
Why would any woman brag that she flushed "three of dem muthaf****** down de toilet"?
Obviously that is a person bound by a demon.
Why would any woman exploit her own little children sexually?
Again a woman bound by a demon.
Why doesn't she get loose like the woman in the Bible?
She doesn't want to be loosed! She is so ignorant and demented she loves being a stealth Demon. Excruciating pain is her pleasure.
You don't have to care about me. You don't have to care about what she does to others. But real soon you are going to wake up and realize how she has harmed you. You are not safe because you do her bidding. Do not think you are safe because you are one of her minions.
Why do you feel so sorry for her? Why don't you know that you are one of her victims also?
If you are a beautiful woman and you confide in her you will never keep a husband or boy friend. Do a check. How old are you? Have you ever shared any intimate secrets with her, about who you love or who you date? Will she advise you to do something whorish?
I have a particular beautiful cousin that has been married four times. This woman has been overly concerned with your love life all of your life. She talks about you behind your back and calls you are lying whore:"...talking bout she ain't never slept wid dat man...who the hell she think believe dat s***? S***! she still sleeping wid L******, dat's who she really love." My point is, you better look well to your going. You are so busy loving and protecting her that you can't see and refuse to hear the truth. She is jealous of your anointing; "She need to learn to preach!"
I'm slow, too slow, but I finally caught on. There is no denying.
"Know ye the TRUTH and the TRUTH shall set you free."
Continue to study His WORD children.
Be a blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Amen and glory to GOD. It is so simple. His Word is so easy to be entreated. But the way of the transgressor is hard.
Don't spend your time trying to save them. God told you that the only thing that you are going to get is a blot. "Cast not your pearls before swine..."
Wow! Why did God call them swine? A filthy animal. Because God knows all things and he knows that they are low life and common, human maggots capable of the most despicable acts ever imagined.
Why do these lying hypocrites get dressed up and run to the "Church" every time the doors open? To fool you, to appeal, to defraud, to set up, to laugh. There is no good in them, none.
So why does God let them live, why does He let them exist? Ask God when you see Him.
I know that I know and I thank God for his revelation without ceasing.
Thank you Lord for revealing this painful disgusting truth to me. Thank you for your Word.
I'm standing on your Word and I'm standing by myself!
Thank you for your courage Lord. Thank you for self respect. Thank you for common decency. Thank you for the ability to love and care about others.
Why any woman would give birth to six children and hate them I don't know. I know what I know. I know what I saw. I know what I lived.
Why would any woman brag that she flushed "three of dem muthaf****** down de toilet"?
Obviously that is a person bound by a demon.
Why would any woman exploit her own little children sexually?
Again a woman bound by a demon.
Why doesn't she get loose like the woman in the Bible?
She doesn't want to be loosed! She is so ignorant and demented she loves being a stealth Demon. Excruciating pain is her pleasure.
You don't have to care about me. You don't have to care about what she does to others. But real soon you are going to wake up and realize how she has harmed you. You are not safe because you do her bidding. Do not think you are safe because you are one of her minions.
Why do you feel so sorry for her? Why don't you know that you are one of her victims also?
If you are a beautiful woman and you confide in her you will never keep a husband or boy friend. Do a check. How old are you? Have you ever shared any intimate secrets with her, about who you love or who you date? Will she advise you to do something whorish?
I have a particular beautiful cousin that has been married four times. This woman has been overly concerned with your love life all of your life. She talks about you behind your back and calls you are lying whore:"...talking bout she ain't never slept wid dat man...who the hell she think believe dat s***? S***! she still sleeping wid L******, dat's who she really love." My point is, you better look well to your going. You are so busy loving and protecting her that you can't see and refuse to hear the truth. She is jealous of your anointing; "She need to learn to preach!"
I'm slow, too slow, but I finally caught on. There is no denying.
"Know ye the TRUTH and the TRUTH shall set you free."
Continue to study His WORD children.
Be a blessing and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
It Is What It Is
There is hurt and there is HURT! There is betrayal and there is BETRAYAL! If you care to know I will tell you about the commonest, cruelest, most sadist stealth sociopath the world has ever known. She is so incredibly depraved that it has taken me sixty years to fully comprehend her sick narcissism.
Whoa you nay sayers. "I wouldn't talk about my mother like that." First of all you are making assumptions and you have never heard of any one human being that is as evil and secretive as she is. Not only is she evil, she is brilliant!
There is no doubt in my mind she is a Demon from Hell!
When I go back and connect all of the sick acts and cruelty I feel like the world's biggest idiot. But I do understand that it is all in divine order. Something that was once a head scratching mystery is now crystal clear.
The fact that my mother was so whorish in 1951 that she didn't know who my father was is very unimportant. A lot of women are 'ho's. That doesn't make them cruel or perverted.
Well this nasty woman and her husband used me as a sex toy, so much so that they rendered me a eunuch. I'll forgive her for that. She is human, she is lustful and she may have been that ignorant.
She dressed in fine clothes and minks while dressing her kids out of thrift shops, she fed us grits and grease, while she came home with her t-bone steak bones and laughed at our plight. Beat us like animals and cussed us like dogs. I forgive her for all of that. It must have been hard to be the mother of five or six children and work for GS-5 wages.
She was always committing some sexually deviant act and we just ignored her. Pretended that it was a one time thing. She is a pioneer freak. I am just talking about what I saw. That was o.k. Too bad she wasn't brave enough to come out of the closet and just be the lesbian she always wanted to be.
She tried to prostitute me at fourteen. He didn't succeed and again I forgave her. She said HE was the pervert, not her. I chose to believe her lie and kept on loving her because she is my mother.
I listened to her tell big lie after bigger lie. I watched her transform herself into Madame Watson and work "roots" and I laughed.
She took me out of ballet when the WHITE lady bragged on me, said I was a natural phenom.
She cussed me out when I asked her if I could take piano lessons.
She threw all of my writing away so that I could not win the Langston Hughes Writing contest.
On and on year after year I had to listen to this woman rant and rave. I watched her work "roots" and tell me how she hated my oldest brother/uncle that she claimed ruined her life. I witnessed her try to pistol whip him in front of his new wife. I watched her trick and lie and laugh.
I let her cuss me out, tell me I wasn't shit!
When she mailed me a letter full of her fecal matter in 1988 I was finally finished with her.
Nine years later in 1997 I returned to the scene of my greatest grief and forgave her. She asked me why and I told her it was at the urging of the Holy Spirit and it was.
Well everything was fine, so I thought. She was preaching and saving souls. I called her every Sunday and sent her all kinds of gifts. Everything was fine. I took care of her after two surgeries. I was there, not my brothers. But the devil would not let her have any happiness. The devil opened her vile mouth again and she started that same crap that she pulled on me when I was a three year old toddler. Her brilliant brain started slipping and she began to tell on herself.
Well I have studied the Bible and it doesn't look good for her. She is a hopeless Demon. I do feel sorry for her. Any woman that would shoot their saintly father in the heart and walk away is an incredible creature. She didn't even blink.
I am the only one that will call her out. That does sadden and disappoint me. She doesn't want to talk to me.
She is in deep denial as she should be. Do not feel sorry for her. Her life is her life. It is the life she created for herself.
Thank you Lord for revealing some of the most painful things to me. I just could not wrap my brain around her and that *Con. I just could not believe that she was still "rooting" people. The Bible says that a dog will return to his vomit and she did.
The lesson here is never to fool with "roots", the occult, none of that.
Don't be stupid, listen to Jesus;"From such stay away."
Thank you Lord for forcing me to accept the horrible truth about her.
Children, do not lean to your own understanding and Trust in GOD with all your heart and if you come in contact` with someone like her learn your lesson quickly and RUN!
How long? Not long.
Study your Bible, embrace the Truth, live right.
Be Blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Whoa you nay sayers. "I wouldn't talk about my mother like that." First of all you are making assumptions and you have never heard of any one human being that is as evil and secretive as she is. Not only is she evil, she is brilliant!
There is no doubt in my mind she is a Demon from Hell!
When I go back and connect all of the sick acts and cruelty I feel like the world's biggest idiot. But I do understand that it is all in divine order. Something that was once a head scratching mystery is now crystal clear.
The fact that my mother was so whorish in 1951 that she didn't know who my father was is very unimportant. A lot of women are 'ho's. That doesn't make them cruel or perverted.
Well this nasty woman and her husband used me as a sex toy, so much so that they rendered me a eunuch. I'll forgive her for that. She is human, she is lustful and she may have been that ignorant.
She dressed in fine clothes and minks while dressing her kids out of thrift shops, she fed us grits and grease, while she came home with her t-bone steak bones and laughed at our plight. Beat us like animals and cussed us like dogs. I forgive her for all of that. It must have been hard to be the mother of five or six children and work for GS-5 wages.
She was always committing some sexually deviant act and we just ignored her. Pretended that it was a one time thing. She is a pioneer freak. I am just talking about what I saw. That was o.k. Too bad she wasn't brave enough to come out of the closet and just be the lesbian she always wanted to be.
She tried to prostitute me at fourteen. He didn't succeed and again I forgave her. She said HE was the pervert, not her. I chose to believe her lie and kept on loving her because she is my mother.
I listened to her tell big lie after bigger lie. I watched her transform herself into Madame Watson and work "roots" and I laughed.
She took me out of ballet when the WHITE lady bragged on me, said I was a natural phenom.
She cussed me out when I asked her if I could take piano lessons.
She threw all of my writing away so that I could not win the Langston Hughes Writing contest.
On and on year after year I had to listen to this woman rant and rave. I watched her work "roots" and tell me how she hated my oldest brother/uncle that she claimed ruined her life. I witnessed her try to pistol whip him in front of his new wife. I watched her trick and lie and laugh.
I let her cuss me out, tell me I wasn't shit!
When she mailed me a letter full of her fecal matter in 1988 I was finally finished with her.
Nine years later in 1997 I returned to the scene of my greatest grief and forgave her. She asked me why and I told her it was at the urging of the Holy Spirit and it was.
Well everything was fine, so I thought. She was preaching and saving souls. I called her every Sunday and sent her all kinds of gifts. Everything was fine. I took care of her after two surgeries. I was there, not my brothers. But the devil would not let her have any happiness. The devil opened her vile mouth again and she started that same crap that she pulled on me when I was a three year old toddler. Her brilliant brain started slipping and she began to tell on herself.
Well I have studied the Bible and it doesn't look good for her. She is a hopeless Demon. I do feel sorry for her. Any woman that would shoot their saintly father in the heart and walk away is an incredible creature. She didn't even blink.
I am the only one that will call her out. That does sadden and disappoint me. She doesn't want to talk to me.
She is in deep denial as she should be. Do not feel sorry for her. Her life is her life. It is the life she created for herself.
Thank you Lord for revealing some of the most painful things to me. I just could not wrap my brain around her and that *Con. I just could not believe that she was still "rooting" people. The Bible says that a dog will return to his vomit and she did.
The lesson here is never to fool with "roots", the occult, none of that.
Don't be stupid, listen to Jesus;"From such stay away."
Thank you Lord for forcing me to accept the horrible truth about her.
Children, do not lean to your own understanding and Trust in GOD with all your heart and if you come in contact` with someone like her learn your lesson quickly and RUN!
How long? Not long.
Study your Bible, embrace the Truth, live right.
Be Blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Tolerated!
To be tolerated is about as good as being dead. When you are tolerated you are to be seen and not heard. You are deemed and idiot before you speak. It is painful but there is no drug for it, no pain killer.
I am fifty-nine years old and tolerated.
'Let her come around but include her out. Say yea,yea repeatedly when she says something. Make sure she gets the sorriest cheapest gifts at Christmas time if you give her anything.'
'Punish her! She should not have been born. She was not planned. Her daddy left me. She is just another black a** nigger! She is nothing. Forget her. Ignore her. No, she is good for something. Use the little black bastard for your sexual pleasure. God doesn't care. If God cared he would not have made her so dark. She is a whimp anyway. She never defends her meely mouth self. Ain't nobody gon believe her no way. I don't know what she trying to get so much education for, little cunt.'
'No she didn't! She is so stupid bragging to me about how she made the highest score on the test. She think she is going to be Fayetteville's first black paralegal. Dat dumb nigga think she gon work with Richie Smith the city attorney. She don't know that I know him. She don't know that I have freaked with him. I can stop that with one little phone call and I did.' (followed by a heidious blood curdling laugh)
'She thought that she was going to get that call to be the first black anchor in Greensboro. She will never get that call. I am so smart I will blame it all on racism. Ha-ha-ha-! They will never catch me, dumb a** niggers.'
'They don't know me I was manufacturing and selling lip reducing cream when I was sixteen years old! I am a genius, no one is smarter than me. And I can act. Brilliant. They will never catch me because they will never suspect me because I am going to put on a robe and climb up in the pulpit and scream and hollar. Dumb a** niggers don't know the difference.'
'Now that I am well past old I will play up my "mental illness". That's right I will just play crazy and my weak a** sons will give me a pass. I don't care nuttin' bout that luddle black cunt. Always running off at the mouth.'
'Lord let me get up from here and go to church. I got to do the morning prayer. I am going to read it because I can't keep this Jesus crap in my head.'
'I can do it! I can do anything I want to do because I always have. I am light bright and damn near white and I am brilliant and charming and you can't catch me. If you catch me in a lie I will blame it on you. As a matter of fact I am going to get you way before you get me. I am going to tell everyone that you are nothing but a drug addict. I am going to whin and sound so pitiful every body is going to love me and hate you.'
'Yea I killed my daddy. The old a** nigger wouldn't die! I got tried of waiting. He was already eighty-four years old. That enough life for anybody! S*** people in his family live all up in their nineties, s*** he had a cousin that lived to be 107! I was sick of that nigga always up in my business, always quoting the Bible. Yea I killed de nigga. Shot him dead through the heart. I couldn't shot him in the head. He was old but he was still pretty. I had a handsome daddy.'
'Well here I am Lord. You know that I am never going to confess. I show ain't gon repent. Let the niggers suffer, serves them right for being so stupid. I still got my "roots" and I am going to "root" all of them until the day I die cause I'm smart and you can't catch me.'
And God said to me "Trust in God with all thine heart and lean not to your own understanding."
To readers of this blog. It is what it is, "Know ye the TRUTH..."
Get a Bible children and study it every day. Search the scripture.
Be Blessed and be a blessing. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much LOve, Peace, and Happiness,
Rachel
I am fifty-nine years old and tolerated.
'Let her come around but include her out. Say yea,yea repeatedly when she says something. Make sure she gets the sorriest cheapest gifts at Christmas time if you give her anything.'
'Punish her! She should not have been born. She was not planned. Her daddy left me. She is just another black a** nigger! She is nothing. Forget her. Ignore her. No, she is good for something. Use the little black bastard for your sexual pleasure. God doesn't care. If God cared he would not have made her so dark. She is a whimp anyway. She never defends her meely mouth self. Ain't nobody gon believe her no way. I don't know what she trying to get so much education for, little cunt.'
'No she didn't! She is so stupid bragging to me about how she made the highest score on the test. She think she is going to be Fayetteville's first black paralegal. Dat dumb nigga think she gon work with Richie Smith the city attorney. She don't know that I know him. She don't know that I have freaked with him. I can stop that with one little phone call and I did.' (followed by a heidious blood curdling laugh)
'She thought that she was going to get that call to be the first black anchor in Greensboro. She will never get that call. I am so smart I will blame it all on racism. Ha-ha-ha-! They will never catch me, dumb a** niggers.'
'They don't know me I was manufacturing and selling lip reducing cream when I was sixteen years old! I am a genius, no one is smarter than me. And I can act. Brilliant. They will never catch me because they will never suspect me because I am going to put on a robe and climb up in the pulpit and scream and hollar. Dumb a** niggers don't know the difference.'
'Now that I am well past old I will play up my "mental illness". That's right I will just play crazy and my weak a** sons will give me a pass. I don't care nuttin' bout that luddle black cunt. Always running off at the mouth.'
'Lord let me get up from here and go to church. I got to do the morning prayer. I am going to read it because I can't keep this Jesus crap in my head.'
'I can do it! I can do anything I want to do because I always have. I am light bright and damn near white and I am brilliant and charming and you can't catch me. If you catch me in a lie I will blame it on you. As a matter of fact I am going to get you way before you get me. I am going to tell everyone that you are nothing but a drug addict. I am going to whin and sound so pitiful every body is going to love me and hate you.'
'Yea I killed my daddy. The old a** nigger wouldn't die! I got tried of waiting. He was already eighty-four years old. That enough life for anybody! S*** people in his family live all up in their nineties, s*** he had a cousin that lived to be 107! I was sick of that nigga always up in my business, always quoting the Bible. Yea I killed de nigga. Shot him dead through the heart. I couldn't shot him in the head. He was old but he was still pretty. I had a handsome daddy.'
'Well here I am Lord. You know that I am never going to confess. I show ain't gon repent. Let the niggers suffer, serves them right for being so stupid. I still got my "roots" and I am going to "root" all of them until the day I die cause I'm smart and you can't catch me.'
And God said to me "Trust in God with all thine heart and lean not to your own understanding."
To readers of this blog. It is what it is, "Know ye the TRUTH..."
Get a Bible children and study it every day. Search the scripture.
Be Blessed and be a blessing. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much LOve, Peace, and Happiness,
Rachel
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