Gil Scott-Heron's sexy croon hit my ear drums first. "Angel Dust" was playing too loudly on my stereo, my key unlocked the door but the steel blot lock was on. I fumbled for the other key and finally gained entry into my apartment.
The place was Diplomat Apartments on Camp Creek Parkway. It was too far from my teaching gig in Sandy Springs. Money prohibited me from finding an apartment in that "golden ghetto".
The year was '77 or '78, I forget. I was "strung out" on Valium. I was one lucky girl. I got all my drugs for free! Men would give me ounces of the best Chronic for the privilege of visiting me and for some unknown reason my mother supplied me with more drugs than I could ever use. I had so much Valium I made it my dinner. Every evening after work I would fix my sustenance, one, sometimes two Valium and a high ball glass of Tankeray gin. It is called a "Salty Dog". That was it. That was my dinner. I was skinny as a rail and the bitch still called me fat.
You couldn't call on me without a gift. I learned that from my mother. No, I was no longer a virgin but I wasn't much more than a tease. Sex has never interested me much. You had to be real fine to stimulate my interest. At least six-foot five with a very masculine physique, chiseled with a firm hard buttock.
I did have a beautiful body. I was stacked. My "mother" used to tell me; "Gul, you built like a brick s***house!" That made me proud. I don't know why. I didn't know how to use it. I didn't know how to exploit my beauty, long luscious hair,pouty lips, big legs. I am finally learning why. Horrible images and memories are starting to creep back into my mind.
GOD had fore warned me. GOD spoke directly to me. I am the one that intellectualized Him away. GOD warned me that he may even hurt me. While I was working hard teaching those very privileged children in Sandy Springs some creep was breaking into my apartment. I am sure that he thought that he had struck gold. There was money "hidden" in the Bible. Bowls of Sterling silver jewelry, wine and liquor and pills, Valium, Librium, Emprium.
What a great day for him,. A comfortable couch to lay up on, drugs and wine, reefer and liquor. The greatest find was my pistol. My .32 H/R pistol loaded with hollow point bullets.
Yea, I was strapped. I used to carry a pistol every where I went. I had a beautiful little leather "holder". It was tres chic. It is only by the Grace of GOD that I never used it. I tried to use it many times. This guy borrowed one hundred and fifty dollars from me one time and was much too tardy paying me back the next month. That's when I bought that pistol in 1974 in Nashville, Tennessee. I remember telling the white salesman that "I had a nigga to kill". We both laughed as I hit every bulls eye in his firing range.
Woman! You know that GOD has always spoken to me. I believe that He has always spoken to you. You've always tried to bargain with GOD to get your way.
You know that you are wrong and you know that your time is up.
Did I get the clairvoyance from you or from my grandmother?
We are both wrong. I am starting to believe that I get it from granddaddy.
Don't worry. Granddaddy totally forgives you and loves you any way. You see that's natural love. That's love the way GOD planned it.
"Love ye one another as I have loved you."
Monday, May 30, 2011
I wouldn't be so smug
I wouldn't be so smug if I were you. That's the first sign of ignorance, "smugness", thinking that you are better than every one else. Thinking your looks, skin color or money make any difference. I don't care if you live in a palace or a hut, chateaux or cave, it's just shelter. The objective is the same, protection from the elements.
Look at this, think about this for just one moment. Some people will do any thing to get money so they can say that they are living better than you. They will do any thing, nothing is too low, too common. So they finally get that thing that they craved. They drive that car or invite you to their dream home. You compliment them but it is not enough.
Nothing will ever be enough because they can't forget what they did to get that thing that they just had to have. You don't praise them enough or you got too much. They look at you and foolishly think that your blessings are the direct result of their sacrifice so now they must rob you. They must take it back. They have a right to your joy, your blessings because it was your fault that they got robbed. It was your fault that they always made the wrong decisions. That fine rich doctor would have married her if it hadn't been for you.
You get nothing but dizzy trying to figure out a demon. Don't even try.
I wouldn't think I had it made just because I had never experienced a tragedy. I would not consider myself "better than" just because I had "normal" parents. Two people that courted and got married first, the right way. I would not congratulate myself because I was born a certain color or a member of a certain race. I wouldn't feel so secure just because I know how to play the stock market. I would not strut around thinking that I was all that because I happen to have thousands of dollars in the bank. My degree from a certain college or university would not make me feel special.
My ability to articulate the language or write a master's thesis doesn't make me better. I am blessed and I do have the right to brag about it. I know GOD chose me! I know that he plucked me up out of the muck and the mire. I know; "He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water." (Isaiah 58:11)
I thank GOD for His WORD every day. I know "Victory is mine".
Be Blessed!
Rachel
Look at this, think about this for just one moment. Some people will do any thing to get money so they can say that they are living better than you. They will do any thing, nothing is too low, too common. So they finally get that thing that they craved. They drive that car or invite you to their dream home. You compliment them but it is not enough.
Nothing will ever be enough because they can't forget what they did to get that thing that they just had to have. You don't praise them enough or you got too much. They look at you and foolishly think that your blessings are the direct result of their sacrifice so now they must rob you. They must take it back. They have a right to your joy, your blessings because it was your fault that they got robbed. It was your fault that they always made the wrong decisions. That fine rich doctor would have married her if it hadn't been for you.
You get nothing but dizzy trying to figure out a demon. Don't even try.
I wouldn't think I had it made just because I had never experienced a tragedy. I would not consider myself "better than" just because I had "normal" parents. Two people that courted and got married first, the right way. I would not congratulate myself because I was born a certain color or a member of a certain race. I wouldn't feel so secure just because I know how to play the stock market. I would not strut around thinking that I was all that because I happen to have thousands of dollars in the bank. My degree from a certain college or university would not make me feel special.
My ability to articulate the language or write a master's thesis doesn't make me better. I am blessed and I do have the right to brag about it. I know GOD chose me! I know that he plucked me up out of the muck and the mire. I know; "He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water." (Isaiah 58:11)
I thank GOD for His WORD every day. I know "Victory is mine".
Be Blessed!
Rachel
Sunday, May 29, 2011
The Devil Is A Liar! (Part II)
The longer I live the more I learn. The more I learn the more I understand. Those tears, the tears I saw my granddaddy shed so often. Those soft gentle tears that would lock under his chin. I observed them much too often. A grown man forced to cry by his ignorant wayward daughter, it is like "rottenness to the bones".
Standing strong and silent, looking just like a wooden Indian. He stood erect with his head unbowed, but he cried. He didn't boo hoo or moan, but he cried. I call them manly tears. I know now that he was in a lot of pain. He suffered with you for a very long time. Incorrigible and bullheaded you never did anything but make your father ashamed and then got fighting mad with anyone that tried to correct you.
You, Mathy Jane, were not going to be corrected or criticized by anyone for any thing, ever! No one and sadly in your mind the least of all was GOD. Incorrigible and defiant GOD gave you over to a reprobate mind.
How long have you known? You've always known that is why you have been so deadly. You know that you are a snake that is why you act like a deadly snake. You call me a snake just for fun. Throw a fly in the ointment, watch him squirm.
You can't punish GOD for your "unacceptability". No body wants trash. You can't make me accept trash. You can't control my destiny and you can't shut my mouth. What you did was stupid, it was corrupt and foul and you ought to acknowledge that. I wasn't there but I can clearly see how you used your "attack" as a weapon against your parents. You skillfully wedged yourself between them and made them hate each other, blame each other.
His oldest son, the son that he knew was his, bled to death in his arms. A beautiful young man, seventeen, tall and strong. A good son, and obedient son. He never said it aloud but I know he had to wonder why. Why the good son? What did he do? Why did he have to suffer pain and humiliation from this "daughter" over and over?
Thank you! I've really learned something. GOD has a plan for each and every person on this earth. You can't buy or win GOD's favor by going to church or paying your tithes. GOD has a plan for all of us. Live the life GOD planned for you. Live by GOD's WORD, trust Him, and Him only.
You were successful in the sabotage of that "union". Who was that man? How did he get his hands on you? "Every body always blamed my mama, said she was trying to go wid him."
You deliberately exploited the guilt of both your mother and father to get what ever you wanted. Your brother was "murdered" when you were thirteen. You took advantage of their grief and indulged yourself in forbidden pleasures. They could never correct you. Your mother excused and supported your lying. She thought your daddy was too strict until you came up pregnant.
That's the loop you got caught in; committing sick reprehensible deeds, vehemently denying, hating and punishing your admonishers, plotting and carrying out revenge on any and every one dumb enough to trust you.
You, Mathy Jane, hate yourself. You hate your self with a passion. You hate yourself for being weak and undisciplined. You never believed your father when he told you that your strength comes from GOD. You never believed your father when he told you to trust in GOD only. Some how you stumbled upon lying, using your brilliant imagination to create a false world where only you reigned supreme. You believed your own lies. You rationalized your life away. I know that it didn't take long to get to be eighty-five. I know because I went to bed at twenty and when I woke up I was sixty.
Unlike you, I know I learned some thing. Through the grace of the LORD Jesus Christ I have lived a life that I can be proud of.
Perhaps "hide" is not the right word, your deeds were never fully hidden, just not talked about. We all knew you were a big whore, we just didn't talk about it. When you did something scandalous yet again, we just didn't talk about it. We never talked about you putting "roots" on cousin Rachel. Granddaddy just reminded you that you were going to hell, you screeched that hideous laugh again.
It is not so much that we "didn't" talk about "it" as much as it was, we "couldn't" talk about it. You had us on "lock". No body better say a thing against you and hope to live. That was a real good strategy, do what ever you want to do and pretend that you didn't do it. Pulverized and pummel any one that says different. That's you. You chose to live your life as a common immoral sadist perverted demon. That was your deliberate choice. But you are such a sick reprobate that you choose to hate people that didn't fall for the devil's lies like you did. You hate me because I didn't turn out like you. Well, it shouldn't be news to you, but there are very few women as common as you are. Women! very few people, very few human beings on this earth that suffer with your lack of morality. You have no moral compass, you will do anything. Anything, but say you are sorry. Anything, but have remorse. You will play crazy until the day you die. It has taken me sixty years but now I know better. (You) "ain't worth hauling to the field."
No, I am not GOD and I don't know when we are going to die. I know that I can go right now and every thing is fine with my soul. You took my granddaddy's life but he was ready to go. His soul was fine.
Don't worry, I will not be wasting a whole lot of breath on you. "Cast not your pearls before swine." "Never waste your breath on a fool." If you haven't learned in eighty-five years, if you haven't caught on by now, it is not going to happen.
God is going to render every man according to his deeds. Hating me is not going to help you. Hating GOD's WORD while pretending to love GOD's WORD makes you an imp.
I knew he suffered terribly from arthritis and I knew that his heart was broken.
I didn't know that he was crying for you. I didn't know that he was crying because his daughter was an evil monster. He had a child that he couldn't control. Did he know that you should have been in prison? You bragged about stabbing that woman for calling you a whore. You broke people from calling you whores, but you didn't change.
I feel sorry for you. I really do, to live a fake phony double life for eighty-five years must have been torture for you. When you can't be who you are, when you can't say what you want to say when you want to say it, you are in misery. A self imposed prison.
Woman what is it? What did you need? What did you want? You blew it! Your selfishness and greed exposed you.
Salvation is free! Why do you have such a great need to please and impress people that don't like you? Why do you hate the people that try to correct and help you?
Well, you sure messed your life up and every life you touched. I get you. Jesus said some of you would believe not (John 6:64)
"Do the best you can." Just keep living, just keep pushing one foot in front of the other. Don't worry; "Jesus will fix it."
Stay in His WORD children. Don't allow the devil to deceive you. Don't let anything separate you from the love of Christ. "Depart from evil and do good."
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Standing strong and silent, looking just like a wooden Indian. He stood erect with his head unbowed, but he cried. He didn't boo hoo or moan, but he cried. I call them manly tears. I know now that he was in a lot of pain. He suffered with you for a very long time. Incorrigible and bullheaded you never did anything but make your father ashamed and then got fighting mad with anyone that tried to correct you.
You, Mathy Jane, were not going to be corrected or criticized by anyone for any thing, ever! No one and sadly in your mind the least of all was GOD. Incorrigible and defiant GOD gave you over to a reprobate mind.
How long have you known? You've always known that is why you have been so deadly. You know that you are a snake that is why you act like a deadly snake. You call me a snake just for fun. Throw a fly in the ointment, watch him squirm.
You can't punish GOD for your "unacceptability". No body wants trash. You can't make me accept trash. You can't control my destiny and you can't shut my mouth. What you did was stupid, it was corrupt and foul and you ought to acknowledge that. I wasn't there but I can clearly see how you used your "attack" as a weapon against your parents. You skillfully wedged yourself between them and made them hate each other, blame each other.
His oldest son, the son that he knew was his, bled to death in his arms. A beautiful young man, seventeen, tall and strong. A good son, and obedient son. He never said it aloud but I know he had to wonder why. Why the good son? What did he do? Why did he have to suffer pain and humiliation from this "daughter" over and over?
Thank you! I've really learned something. GOD has a plan for each and every person on this earth. You can't buy or win GOD's favor by going to church or paying your tithes. GOD has a plan for all of us. Live the life GOD planned for you. Live by GOD's WORD, trust Him, and Him only.
You were successful in the sabotage of that "union". Who was that man? How did he get his hands on you? "Every body always blamed my mama, said she was trying to go wid him."
You deliberately exploited the guilt of both your mother and father to get what ever you wanted. Your brother was "murdered" when you were thirteen. You took advantage of their grief and indulged yourself in forbidden pleasures. They could never correct you. Your mother excused and supported your lying. She thought your daddy was too strict until you came up pregnant.
That's the loop you got caught in; committing sick reprehensible deeds, vehemently denying, hating and punishing your admonishers, plotting and carrying out revenge on any and every one dumb enough to trust you.
You, Mathy Jane, hate yourself. You hate your self with a passion. You hate yourself for being weak and undisciplined. You never believed your father when he told you that your strength comes from GOD. You never believed your father when he told you to trust in GOD only. Some how you stumbled upon lying, using your brilliant imagination to create a false world where only you reigned supreme. You believed your own lies. You rationalized your life away. I know that it didn't take long to get to be eighty-five. I know because I went to bed at twenty and when I woke up I was sixty.
Unlike you, I know I learned some thing. Through the grace of the LORD Jesus Christ I have lived a life that I can be proud of.
Perhaps "hide" is not the right word, your deeds were never fully hidden, just not talked about. We all knew you were a big whore, we just didn't talk about it. When you did something scandalous yet again, we just didn't talk about it. We never talked about you putting "roots" on cousin Rachel. Granddaddy just reminded you that you were going to hell, you screeched that hideous laugh again.
It is not so much that we "didn't" talk about "it" as much as it was, we "couldn't" talk about it. You had us on "lock". No body better say a thing against you and hope to live. That was a real good strategy, do what ever you want to do and pretend that you didn't do it. Pulverized and pummel any one that says different. That's you. You chose to live your life as a common immoral sadist perverted demon. That was your deliberate choice. But you are such a sick reprobate that you choose to hate people that didn't fall for the devil's lies like you did. You hate me because I didn't turn out like you. Well, it shouldn't be news to you, but there are very few women as common as you are. Women! very few people, very few human beings on this earth that suffer with your lack of morality. You have no moral compass, you will do anything. Anything, but say you are sorry. Anything, but have remorse. You will play crazy until the day you die. It has taken me sixty years but now I know better. (You) "ain't worth hauling to the field."
No, I am not GOD and I don't know when we are going to die. I know that I can go right now and every thing is fine with my soul. You took my granddaddy's life but he was ready to go. His soul was fine.
Don't worry, I will not be wasting a whole lot of breath on you. "Cast not your pearls before swine." "Never waste your breath on a fool." If you haven't learned in eighty-five years, if you haven't caught on by now, it is not going to happen.
God is going to render every man according to his deeds. Hating me is not going to help you. Hating GOD's WORD while pretending to love GOD's WORD makes you an imp.
I knew he suffered terribly from arthritis and I knew that his heart was broken.
I didn't know that he was crying for you. I didn't know that he was crying because his daughter was an evil monster. He had a child that he couldn't control. Did he know that you should have been in prison? You bragged about stabbing that woman for calling you a whore. You broke people from calling you whores, but you didn't change.
I feel sorry for you. I really do, to live a fake phony double life for eighty-five years must have been torture for you. When you can't be who you are, when you can't say what you want to say when you want to say it, you are in misery. A self imposed prison.
Woman what is it? What did you need? What did you want? You blew it! Your selfishness and greed exposed you.
Salvation is free! Why do you have such a great need to please and impress people that don't like you? Why do you hate the people that try to correct and help you?
Well, you sure messed your life up and every life you touched. I get you. Jesus said some of you would believe not (John 6:64)
"Do the best you can." Just keep living, just keep pushing one foot in front of the other. Don't worry; "Jesus will fix it."
Stay in His WORD children. Don't allow the devil to deceive you. Don't let anything separate you from the love of Christ. "Depart from evil and do good."
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Nothing has changed
Nothing has changed, wrong is still wrong, right is still right. You're still a vile reprobate. You can't scrub my memory clean and you sure can't shut my mouth.
Yea, you robbed me of a childhood, tortured me until I was fifty-eight years old! (But, you gave me a great book, thanks) Congratulations! You sure proved that you are the smartest. (Dumb me, I didn't even know we were in a contest) Who would ever suspect their mother of treachery and perversion? Who ever heard of a volunteer demon?
You never had to be a prostitute. Your father was prosperous, he indulged you, gave you every thing you ever thought you wanted. Your father sent you to the top "colored" university and you paid him back with a bullet.
I marvel, your fake pride and ignorant obstinacy make me want to wretch. Again, you are not that ignorant, but you are that Evil!
I hope you are watching that Casey Anthony case very carefully. It seems that nasty narcissistic dad was molesting the daughter right under the mother's nose Does that sound familiar to you? You don't think the mother was getting her cut and turning her head do you? "What's done in the dark shall surely come to light."
Bishop Eddie Long settled out of court. Why didn't he want to go to court, especially after he vowed to fight? What a slick pimp. 'We are just paying so that we can get on with what GOD wants us to do.' In other words; 'I'm still conning. I can make "Go make a peanut butter sandwich" sound good. My minions will pay for my indiscretions and I am not about to change. Ha-ha-ha, I'm too smart you can't catch me."
All the answers are in that book that too many people are too lazy to read. "Because of fair words they deceive the simple." There are far too many people ignorant of GOD's plan for their lives because they are too lazy to read. This is "anti-intellectualism" at it's worst. What if your "Precha" is only interested in your cash? What if your "Precha" is a legend in his own mind? Why do you really go to that church? Are you serving GOD or man? Do you have enough courage to serve GOD in this selfish "dog-eat-dog" world? Or are you just looking out for yourself? Are you just making sure that you cover your own behind while begging GOD for a blessing? Our children are being ruined by the millions while we pretend that this blog is too offensive. "Why I never!" "Nothing like that has ever happened in my family and never will!"
You better know something brothers and sisters; God can turn your life upside down on a dime. He can turn your "midnights into bright tomorrows." GOD can make you see things that you refused to see.
GOD told me to tell you that He rights every wrong. He said that You will get your just and honest due on this planet earth. Remember one thing; "The wicked fleeth when no one pursueth." And You will reap what you sow.
Stay in His WORD children. TRUST GOD! Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Yea, you robbed me of a childhood, tortured me until I was fifty-eight years old! (But, you gave me a great book, thanks) Congratulations! You sure proved that you are the smartest. (Dumb me, I didn't even know we were in a contest) Who would ever suspect their mother of treachery and perversion? Who ever heard of a volunteer demon?
You never had to be a prostitute. Your father was prosperous, he indulged you, gave you every thing you ever thought you wanted. Your father sent you to the top "colored" university and you paid him back with a bullet.
I marvel, your fake pride and ignorant obstinacy make me want to wretch. Again, you are not that ignorant, but you are that Evil!
I hope you are watching that Casey Anthony case very carefully. It seems that nasty narcissistic dad was molesting the daughter right under the mother's nose Does that sound familiar to you? You don't think the mother was getting her cut and turning her head do you? "What's done in the dark shall surely come to light."
Bishop Eddie Long settled out of court. Why didn't he want to go to court, especially after he vowed to fight? What a slick pimp. 'We are just paying so that we can get on with what GOD wants us to do.' In other words; 'I'm still conning. I can make "Go make a peanut butter sandwich" sound good. My minions will pay for my indiscretions and I am not about to change. Ha-ha-ha, I'm too smart you can't catch me."
All the answers are in that book that too many people are too lazy to read. "Because of fair words they deceive the simple." There are far too many people ignorant of GOD's plan for their lives because they are too lazy to read. This is "anti-intellectualism" at it's worst. What if your "Precha" is only interested in your cash? What if your "Precha" is a legend in his own mind? Why do you really go to that church? Are you serving GOD or man? Do you have enough courage to serve GOD in this selfish "dog-eat-dog" world? Or are you just looking out for yourself? Are you just making sure that you cover your own behind while begging GOD for a blessing? Our children are being ruined by the millions while we pretend that this blog is too offensive. "Why I never!" "Nothing like that has ever happened in my family and never will!"
You better know something brothers and sisters; God can turn your life upside down on a dime. He can turn your "midnights into bright tomorrows." GOD can make you see things that you refused to see.
GOD told me to tell you that He rights every wrong. He said that You will get your just and honest due on this planet earth. Remember one thing; "The wicked fleeth when no one pursueth." And You will reap what you sow.
Stay in His WORD children. TRUST GOD! Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Friday, May 27, 2011
My first Sunday School Lesson
I don't teach Sunday School but if I did I would not get my "lesson" out of one of those Sunday School Quarterlies they sell to the easily duped "wanna be Christians". People too lazy to read and study for themselves, people that want the "Cliff Notes", "just tell us the good stuff", micro message seeking, instant gratification, pay my tithe and leave me the hell alone "Christians".
I would teach from my heart and experiences. I would tell them about the mid-wives in Egypt that refused to kill the male Hebrew boy babies. They were afraid of the Pharaoh but they FEARED GOD. (Exodus 1:14-17) They knew GOD was sending a special child to deliver them from bondage. They refused to be a part of the devil's sick plan to kill their saviour.
I would tell my class that too many of our mothers and mid-wives have lost their fear and have become accursed. They have lost their natural affection and are harming our children by the millions. I would tell them about this mother that GOD sent child after child after child.
This poor foolish woman was froward ( froh-werd) - wilfully contrary, not easily managed, intractable. This woman was incorrigible. The more her father tried to reach and teach her the more she rebelled. Brilliant, she used all of her GOD given talent to serve the devil. As a child it was fun, but as she grew each deed grew worse and worse. She waxed worse and worse just like the Bible said she would. Lying became automatic, her second nature, inflicting fear was her habit. This woman grew into a horrid monster that did far more evil than she ever did good. Honored in some circles for her "bad" she reigned supreme. Honored in other circles she was loved and praised for her "good". This poor woman has spent eighty-five long years trying to keep these worlds apart. These "worlds" are about to collide.
I would teach my class the meaning of repentance, repentance means to turn away from. Turn away from permanently, not refrain from and return to every time you feel slighted, inferior, hurt, over looked or jealous.
I would teach my class that GOD is a resource we all have, anything we want all we have to do is ask.
I would tell that woman that GOD sent her a child like Moses and she did everything in her power to destroy that child. But through the miraculous power of the LORD Jesus Christ that child grew strong and whole without a mother's love.
GOD understands that you could not give what you did not have. GOD forgives you, you have to forgive yourself. You have to quit lying. Step out on the wings of faith and claim your victory in Christ.
I would make sure that everyone in my class knew that;"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; but fools despise wisdom and instruction." (Proverbs 1:7)
That would be my whole lesson, my first Sunday School lesson.
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I would teach from my heart and experiences. I would tell them about the mid-wives in Egypt that refused to kill the male Hebrew boy babies. They were afraid of the Pharaoh but they FEARED GOD. (Exodus 1:14-17) They knew GOD was sending a special child to deliver them from bondage. They refused to be a part of the devil's sick plan to kill their saviour.
I would tell my class that too many of our mothers and mid-wives have lost their fear and have become accursed. They have lost their natural affection and are harming our children by the millions. I would tell them about this mother that GOD sent child after child after child.
This poor foolish woman was froward ( froh-werd) - wilfully contrary, not easily managed, intractable. This woman was incorrigible. The more her father tried to reach and teach her the more she rebelled. Brilliant, she used all of her GOD given talent to serve the devil. As a child it was fun, but as she grew each deed grew worse and worse. She waxed worse and worse just like the Bible said she would. Lying became automatic, her second nature, inflicting fear was her habit. This woman grew into a horrid monster that did far more evil than she ever did good. Honored in some circles for her "bad" she reigned supreme. Honored in other circles she was loved and praised for her "good". This poor woman has spent eighty-five long years trying to keep these worlds apart. These "worlds" are about to collide.
I would teach my class the meaning of repentance, repentance means to turn away from. Turn away from permanently, not refrain from and return to every time you feel slighted, inferior, hurt, over looked or jealous.
I would teach my class that GOD is a resource we all have, anything we want all we have to do is ask.
I would tell that woman that GOD sent her a child like Moses and she did everything in her power to destroy that child. But through the miraculous power of the LORD Jesus Christ that child grew strong and whole without a mother's love.
GOD understands that you could not give what you did not have. GOD forgives you, you have to forgive yourself. You have to quit lying. Step out on the wings of faith and claim your victory in Christ.
I would make sure that everyone in my class knew that;"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; but fools despise wisdom and instruction." (Proverbs 1:7)
That would be my whole lesson, my first Sunday School lesson.
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, May 26, 2011
"Blunt force trauma"
"Where am I?"
"Somewhere in Awe!"
"Where is AWE?"
"Somewhere just below heaven, somewhere in the bosom of Abraham. I am wrapped in GOD's warm protective arms, I tell you! Praise the LORD! 'You can't make me doubt Him!' "
They just flashed the headline on the news. The coroner ruled the five month old baby's death to be the result of blunt force trauma.
Blunt force trauma to the torso caused the baby to die. Both parents have been charged, two imps murdered their own baby. Too ignorant, too "no sense-ED", GOD took His gift back. GOD rescued that poor little child from a life of certain misery.
Another poor little baby gone too soon. Denied life by two reprobates that thought they gave her life.
"Blunt force trauma" did not kill me. GOD healed me and is making me whole. Praise the LORD!
The devil will trick you out of your blessing. You have done every thing in your power to destroy every dream you heard of and you THINK that you succeeded. But what did you get? You derailed a brilliant musician's career. You robbed him of any hope for a happy life. A life you denied him because of your guilt. Every time you looked at that tall lanky brown skin baby you had to think of that long tall drink of water that you used to mess around with when your husband was in the field. Why beat him? Why blame the baby? Why can't you accept responsibility for your own actions?
But what did it get you? All of your relatives are dumb and "no-sense-ED" according to you. You are the only person in the entire family with any sense. All you do is shell out money to "sorry no-count niggas that don't do nuttin' fa you." "Dey don't come here till dey need sumpin'!" (He won't do it. That devil will not let you be happy for any reason. The devil will not let you love.)
"Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness and receive with meekness the engrafted WORD, which is able to SAVE your souls." (James 1:21)
Say in His WORD children. Don't let the devil trick you out of your blessing. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
"Somewhere in Awe!"
"Where is AWE?"
"Somewhere just below heaven, somewhere in the bosom of Abraham. I am wrapped in GOD's warm protective arms, I tell you! Praise the LORD! 'You can't make me doubt Him!' "
They just flashed the headline on the news. The coroner ruled the five month old baby's death to be the result of blunt force trauma.
Blunt force trauma to the torso caused the baby to die. Both parents have been charged, two imps murdered their own baby. Too ignorant, too "no sense-ED", GOD took His gift back. GOD rescued that poor little child from a life of certain misery.
Another poor little baby gone too soon. Denied life by two reprobates that thought they gave her life.
"Blunt force trauma" did not kill me. GOD healed me and is making me whole. Praise the LORD!
The devil will trick you out of your blessing. You have done every thing in your power to destroy every dream you heard of and you THINK that you succeeded. But what did you get? You derailed a brilliant musician's career. You robbed him of any hope for a happy life. A life you denied him because of your guilt. Every time you looked at that tall lanky brown skin baby you had to think of that long tall drink of water that you used to mess around with when your husband was in the field. Why beat him? Why blame the baby? Why can't you accept responsibility for your own actions?
But what did it get you? All of your relatives are dumb and "no-sense-ED" according to you. You are the only person in the entire family with any sense. All you do is shell out money to "sorry no-count niggas that don't do nuttin' fa you." "Dey don't come here till dey need sumpin'!" (He won't do it. That devil will not let you be happy for any reason. The devil will not let you love.)
"Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness and receive with meekness the engrafted WORD, which is able to SAVE your souls." (James 1:21)
Say in His WORD children. Don't let the devil trick you out of your blessing. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
"The facts mam, just the facts"
Get the facts mam, just the facts before you judge me. Slow down and mull over this situation carefully before you lacerate me with your two edged tongue. Why are you so quick to heap on painful insults and out right lies?
Let me remind you that the mother is the first teacher. That baby's mind is no more than supple clay in that mother's hands. She can make a President or she can create a worse monster than she is. She can create a mentally crippled co-dependent alcoholic, a paranoid schizophrenic, an anti social recluse if she so desires.
You should know that we were indoctrinated and terrorized by a seriously fractured "mentally ill" woman. No, she is not really mentally ill. "Mental illness" is her cover, it is her ruse. It is the best ploy she could come up with. If she were really mentally ill she would not or could not conceal her real character so cleverly. It has worked for eighty-five years because there are very few people willing to take the vicious assaults that follow any attempt to save her. There are few people brave enough, few people with enough courage to face that black hearted demon that hides behind the robes and crosses. Plus if you go along with her bull she will reward you especially if you are a male. And no doubt about it she will swell your head with compliments. She knows exactly what to say to you to make her enemies your enemies. She will dictate who you should love, marry, honor, believe. She will lie to you knowing that you know that she is lying. She calls it respect, honor. 'Don't you niggas front on me.' while she broadcasts your every move.
She depends on your fear. You will fear her temper or you will fear her "roots" or both.
But let me tell you how good GOD is! I did my master's thesis on Voodoo and Conjure. She did what every book and every practitioner warned against. She "mixed her hand". A "hand" is the type of conjure you use. A "good hand" is a healing hand, healing is your specialty. A "bad hand" works evil, kills people, blinds, hurts and injures people. She did both.
The penalty for mixing your hand is instant insanity, your mind will run like a river. We call it bi-polar, GOD calls it demon possession. She is not insane, she is not crazy. She is double minded! (Read the book of James) "A double minded man is unstable in all of his ways."
I know now what I didn't know then. He, my grandfather was intimidated by her. There was fear and rightly so. She tried to kill him on his best friend's front porch when she was sixteen. Embarrassing your father to high heaven is a good way to always get your way.
I am determined to piece this awful mystery together. I believe that she was "attacked" at eight years old. It may not have happened just as she said, but she was raped. She told me that she was raped three times and she suffered excruciating pain and that there was a lot of blood.
Knowing what a corrupt lying manipulative woman she is I can clearly see how she exploited her tragedy to insure that she always got her way. Maybe one day she will finally see that her way was the wrong way.
You keep yourself up. Stay in His WORD children. Let me tell you something, the devil or evil forces or what ever label you put on it wants you to give up. The devil wants to lay you so low that getting up will never cross your mind. Never let the devil win. Make sure you know that GOD has given you a resource in Christ. Anything that you want, just ask Him. GOD's WORD is infallible. TRUST GOD with all of your heart, mind and spirit.
Don't lie and pretend for any one. Do not turn a blind eye to wrong doing. Trust GOD to deliver and protect you from evil. Do not walk after the evil imaginations of your own heart. Study the book of Jeremiah.
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Let me remind you that the mother is the first teacher. That baby's mind is no more than supple clay in that mother's hands. She can make a President or she can create a worse monster than she is. She can create a mentally crippled co-dependent alcoholic, a paranoid schizophrenic, an anti social recluse if she so desires.
You should know that we were indoctrinated and terrorized by a seriously fractured "mentally ill" woman. No, she is not really mentally ill. "Mental illness" is her cover, it is her ruse. It is the best ploy she could come up with. If she were really mentally ill she would not or could not conceal her real character so cleverly. It has worked for eighty-five years because there are very few people willing to take the vicious assaults that follow any attempt to save her. There are few people brave enough, few people with enough courage to face that black hearted demon that hides behind the robes and crosses. Plus if you go along with her bull she will reward you especially if you are a male. And no doubt about it she will swell your head with compliments. She knows exactly what to say to you to make her enemies your enemies. She will dictate who you should love, marry, honor, believe. She will lie to you knowing that you know that she is lying. She calls it respect, honor. 'Don't you niggas front on me.' while she broadcasts your every move.
She depends on your fear. You will fear her temper or you will fear her "roots" or both.
But let me tell you how good GOD is! I did my master's thesis on Voodoo and Conjure. She did what every book and every practitioner warned against. She "mixed her hand". A "hand" is the type of conjure you use. A "good hand" is a healing hand, healing is your specialty. A "bad hand" works evil, kills people, blinds, hurts and injures people. She did both.
The penalty for mixing your hand is instant insanity, your mind will run like a river. We call it bi-polar, GOD calls it demon possession. She is not insane, she is not crazy. She is double minded! (Read the book of James) "A double minded man is unstable in all of his ways."
I know now what I didn't know then. He, my grandfather was intimidated by her. There was fear and rightly so. She tried to kill him on his best friend's front porch when she was sixteen. Embarrassing your father to high heaven is a good way to always get your way.
I am determined to piece this awful mystery together. I believe that she was "attacked" at eight years old. It may not have happened just as she said, but she was raped. She told me that she was raped three times and she suffered excruciating pain and that there was a lot of blood.
Knowing what a corrupt lying manipulative woman she is I can clearly see how she exploited her tragedy to insure that she always got her way. Maybe one day she will finally see that her way was the wrong way.
You keep yourself up. Stay in His WORD children. Let me tell you something, the devil or evil forces or what ever label you put on it wants you to give up. The devil wants to lay you so low that getting up will never cross your mind. Never let the devil win. Make sure you know that GOD has given you a resource in Christ. Anything that you want, just ask Him. GOD's WORD is infallible. TRUST GOD with all of your heart, mind and spirit.
Don't lie and pretend for any one. Do not turn a blind eye to wrong doing. Trust GOD to deliver and protect you from evil. Do not walk after the evil imaginations of your own heart. Study the book of Jeremiah.
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Monday, May 23, 2011
A brand new day!
Praise the LORD! Thank you for a brand new day LORD. Thank you for another opportunity to get it right, another opportunity to serve you. Dear LORD Thank You! Thank you for your tender mercies, for your beautiful plan. Dear LORD thank you for your courage, wisdom and understanding.
I am getting stronger, I am gradually accepting the truth. Very slowly I am starting to understand. I am unraveling this mystery. I am discovering some shameful truths that I would have rather never known.
As much as I always loved my grandfather I love and respect him more now in death than I ever did in life.
Jerome Walters was a very humble man. He was every woman's dream husband. Tall, handsome, wise, gentle and prosperous. Not only was he a true Christian he was a gentleman.
He never destroyed your name. He never told us the truth about you. He protected us from you as much as he could, but he never bad mouthed you. He never told us of the sick demonic deeds you committed before we came on the scene.
My grandfather was truly the strong silent type. He did not gossip or carry tales. If he couldn't build you up or encourage you he didn't say anything. He never relished in your pain or washed your face in your mistakes. Yea, I know the exact opposite of you.
You "dumped" us in the country every summer. That was the best thing you could have ever done. (It's called divine intervention and I still marvel.) We romped, explored , played with our cousins, absorbed our grandfather's awesome wisdom.
I was seven, maybe eight, and granddaddy would have me read books of the Bible to him and then interpret them. I didn't know it, but he was slyly teaching me critical thinking skills while introducing me to GOD's WORD.
My first lesson was the book of Proverbs. "How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity ? and the scorners delight in their scorning, and fools hate knowledge? Turn you at my reproof; behold, I will pour out my spirit unto you, I will make known my words unto you." (Proverbs 1:22-23)
Believe me sister, the Bible is like Chinese arithmetic to the demonic unbeliever. Yea, you "preach", but you don't know what you are talking about. Sit down! Don't you dare disrespect GOD, putting on a show. Life is not a Tyler Perry movie. That Bible is for you too "precha".
GOD didn't give us His WORD to mock. If your church is not a real "Church" by all means play church. Hoop, holler, run around, lying and crying. Catch a feel good moment, entertain, then go home and conjure up some more evil to get into.
I heard that you have been crying. Good, "the more you cry the less you piss!" ; is what you always told me. I've only seen you cry twice in my entire life. You cried when I was eight years old and you bought me my first pair of glasses. I said " Oh! mother! The world is so beautiful!" You cried then. I thought you cried because you loved me and you were sorry for beating a little blind girl that couldn't see the clock.
Yea, you cried when *Gino finally left you. You treated that man worse than any animal. You were always loud, vulgar, ignorant, kept a nasty house, walked around "stanking" with out your partials and hair sticking up. Of course he left you! Woman what kind of demon did you get "ahold" of?
If a person has not changed in eighty-five years I believe they might not make it into the kingdom. But you the "living", the "young" can learn from her mistakes.
First of all; Trust GOD with all thine heart, lean not to your own understanding. Number two; don't LIE! You must be an honest person in all that you do. Nothing is more offensive than a liar. Lying is worse than putrid bad breath. It is insulting and I will not tolerate it. I am not "even" going to pretend that a liar is telling the truth. "Get the behind me Satan!" Just how do you think you can get away with lying to GOD? GOD knows all and sees all.
How ironic, the one admonishment that you used to scream for hours was; "He said a liar wud'nt tarry in His sight!" Who knew all that clamor and screaming was coming from a pathological liar?
Well it worked on me. "Ain't GOD good!" I am growing stronger every day. I don't think you started out to become one of the commonest vilest women that ever lived on this earth, but you did. It's cool, GOD saved me.
There are some things that you did I have to laugh at. I look back, thank GOD and laugh. You had me driving *Goat's old Mercury Cougar without any brakes! You sly dog you. You tried to get me killed but GOD stepped in on time! You can't beat GOD,why don't you quit trying? The devil will embarrass you. Look at you, a "root working" preacher. Nobody can defend that. You are down there in that hole looking up because you wanted to drive a second hand Cadillac, wanted to be the "top of the bottom".
"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; but fools despise wisdom and understanding." (Proverbs 1:7)
"How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity? and the the scorners delight in their scorning, and fools hate knowledge." (Proverbs 1:22)
Number three; "Seek the mind of Christ." do not walk after the evil imaginations of your heart. "Step out on the wings of faith." Tap into GOD's goodness, trust Him.
No, you did not defeat me. You said that you did the best you could, perhaps you did. I know you can't get everything. No one's life is perfect or painless. I certainly know that I was tethered to the worse possible "mother" but GOD in His infinite wisdom balanced that "creature" with my great grandfather. He stood in the Gap for his grandchildren. He was a very wise man, he taught by example and saved my life. He saved our lives.
You proved to be a waste but that's your choice. You still have free will. I know I have a resource in Christ. GOD has never denied me anything that I asked for. He strengthens me, leads and guides me and protects me from Evil. GOD has always protected me from you and He always will.
Stay in His WORD children. Be richly blessed. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I am getting stronger, I am gradually accepting the truth. Very slowly I am starting to understand. I am unraveling this mystery. I am discovering some shameful truths that I would have rather never known.
As much as I always loved my grandfather I love and respect him more now in death than I ever did in life.
Jerome Walters was a very humble man. He was every woman's dream husband. Tall, handsome, wise, gentle and prosperous. Not only was he a true Christian he was a gentleman.
He never destroyed your name. He never told us the truth about you. He protected us from you as much as he could, but he never bad mouthed you. He never told us of the sick demonic deeds you committed before we came on the scene.
My grandfather was truly the strong silent type. He did not gossip or carry tales. If he couldn't build you up or encourage you he didn't say anything. He never relished in your pain or washed your face in your mistakes. Yea, I know the exact opposite of you.
You "dumped" us in the country every summer. That was the best thing you could have ever done. (It's called divine intervention and I still marvel.) We romped, explored , played with our cousins, absorbed our grandfather's awesome wisdom.
I was seven, maybe eight, and granddaddy would have me read books of the Bible to him and then interpret them. I didn't know it, but he was slyly teaching me critical thinking skills while introducing me to GOD's WORD.
My first lesson was the book of Proverbs. "How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity ? and the scorners delight in their scorning, and fools hate knowledge? Turn you at my reproof; behold, I will pour out my spirit unto you, I will make known my words unto you." (Proverbs 1:22-23)
Believe me sister, the Bible is like Chinese arithmetic to the demonic unbeliever. Yea, you "preach", but you don't know what you are talking about. Sit down! Don't you dare disrespect GOD, putting on a show. Life is not a Tyler Perry movie. That Bible is for you too "precha".
GOD didn't give us His WORD to mock. If your church is not a real "Church" by all means play church. Hoop, holler, run around, lying and crying. Catch a feel good moment, entertain, then go home and conjure up some more evil to get into.
I heard that you have been crying. Good, "the more you cry the less you piss!" ; is what you always told me. I've only seen you cry twice in my entire life. You cried when I was eight years old and you bought me my first pair of glasses. I said " Oh! mother! The world is so beautiful!" You cried then. I thought you cried because you loved me and you were sorry for beating a little blind girl that couldn't see the clock.
Yea, you cried when *Gino finally left you. You treated that man worse than any animal. You were always loud, vulgar, ignorant, kept a nasty house, walked around "stanking" with out your partials and hair sticking up. Of course he left you! Woman what kind of demon did you get "ahold" of?
If a person has not changed in eighty-five years I believe they might not make it into the kingdom. But you the "living", the "young" can learn from her mistakes.
First of all; Trust GOD with all thine heart, lean not to your own understanding. Number two; don't LIE! You must be an honest person in all that you do. Nothing is more offensive than a liar. Lying is worse than putrid bad breath. It is insulting and I will not tolerate it. I am not "even" going to pretend that a liar is telling the truth. "Get the behind me Satan!" Just how do you think you can get away with lying to GOD? GOD knows all and sees all.
How ironic, the one admonishment that you used to scream for hours was; "He said a liar wud'nt tarry in His sight!" Who knew all that clamor and screaming was coming from a pathological liar?
Well it worked on me. "Ain't GOD good!" I am growing stronger every day. I don't think you started out to become one of the commonest vilest women that ever lived on this earth, but you did. It's cool, GOD saved me.
There are some things that you did I have to laugh at. I look back, thank GOD and laugh. You had me driving *Goat's old Mercury Cougar without any brakes! You sly dog you. You tried to get me killed but GOD stepped in on time! You can't beat GOD,why don't you quit trying? The devil will embarrass you. Look at you, a "root working" preacher. Nobody can defend that. You are down there in that hole looking up because you wanted to drive a second hand Cadillac, wanted to be the "top of the bottom".
"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; but fools despise wisdom and understanding." (Proverbs 1:7)
"How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity? and the the scorners delight in their scorning, and fools hate knowledge." (Proverbs 1:22)
Number three; "Seek the mind of Christ." do not walk after the evil imaginations of your heart. "Step out on the wings of faith." Tap into GOD's goodness, trust Him.
No, you did not defeat me. You said that you did the best you could, perhaps you did. I know you can't get everything. No one's life is perfect or painless. I certainly know that I was tethered to the worse possible "mother" but GOD in His infinite wisdom balanced that "creature" with my great grandfather. He stood in the Gap for his grandchildren. He was a very wise man, he taught by example and saved my life. He saved our lives.
You proved to be a waste but that's your choice. You still have free will. I know I have a resource in Christ. GOD has never denied me anything that I asked for. He strengthens me, leads and guides me and protects me from Evil. GOD has always protected me from you and He always will.
Stay in His WORD children. Be richly blessed. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Lesson Learned
It is May 22, 2011 and we are still here. No man knows the time. How dare we play GOD or try to speak for GOD. If you want to do something for GOD, live right! Love thy neighbor as thyself. Tell the TRUTH sometime! Quit being phony, quit trying to garner favor from people that you don't like to get something that you don't need.
Most of all quit tolerating phony preachers. Say something, run them out of the church. Jesus did.
My grandfather taught me that "Time changes all things." Praise the LORD! There was a time when I couldn't tell what you did to me. I didn't have the words, I didn't have the vocabulary and I certainly didn't have the courage. GOD is so wonderful in His infinite wisdom. I didn't know what you were doing but instinctively I knew that it was wrong. As a toddler I knew that I should be ashamed and I was, that why I didn't tell and I was ashamed of you. (She's your mother. She's real pretty. She's real nice sometime. She's real mean. She is a real mean lady. Stay away from her.) I was a poor little girl forced to strategize in order to survive. Shame on you Mathy Jane.
I know now that I have always been ashamed of you. You know that. You know that all of your relatives have always been ashamed of you that is why they keep your secrets and pretend to not notice.
You are the evilest demon on earth and you will rot in Hell. How dare you hate the people that try to love you, try to protect you. How dare you destroy the people GOD put in your life to save you.
Again, you are not that dumb but you are that EVIL. Evil without a cause. Vermin for no reason. You destroyed ever life line that GOD ever sent you, relished your treachery, then laughed.
I have thought about it for a very long time. Why me? Why did I suffer so long? Why did I allow you to make me your "puppy"? Believe it or not I kept hoping that you would change. You would finally become that person that you pretended to be. I thought I was being a good Christian. I thought I was doing GOD's will until I finally understood Jesus; "Shun the very presence of EVIL." "From such stay away." "Your enemies shall be of your own household."
Stay in His WORD children! Rember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing!"
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Most of all quit tolerating phony preachers. Say something, run them out of the church. Jesus did.
My grandfather taught me that "Time changes all things." Praise the LORD! There was a time when I couldn't tell what you did to me. I didn't have the words, I didn't have the vocabulary and I certainly didn't have the courage. GOD is so wonderful in His infinite wisdom. I didn't know what you were doing but instinctively I knew that it was wrong. As a toddler I knew that I should be ashamed and I was, that why I didn't tell and I was ashamed of you. (She's your mother. She's real pretty. She's real nice sometime. She's real mean. She is a real mean lady. Stay away from her.) I was a poor little girl forced to strategize in order to survive. Shame on you Mathy Jane.
I know now that I have always been ashamed of you. You know that. You know that all of your relatives have always been ashamed of you that is why they keep your secrets and pretend to not notice.
You are the evilest demon on earth and you will rot in Hell. How dare you hate the people that try to love you, try to protect you. How dare you destroy the people GOD put in your life to save you.
Again, you are not that dumb but you are that EVIL. Evil without a cause. Vermin for no reason. You destroyed ever life line that GOD ever sent you, relished your treachery, then laughed.
I have thought about it for a very long time. Why me? Why did I suffer so long? Why did I allow you to make me your "puppy"? Believe it or not I kept hoping that you would change. You would finally become that person that you pretended to be. I thought I was being a good Christian. I thought I was doing GOD's will until I finally understood Jesus; "Shun the very presence of EVIL." "From such stay away." "Your enemies shall be of your own household."
Stay in His WORD children! Rember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing!"
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Saturday, May 21, 2011
"This is a cold cruel world"
"This is a cold cruel world." were the exact words my "mother" told me repeatedly when I was a small child. She is right. I appreciate the heads up. She did not tell me that she hated me and wished me nothing but ill will. I do thank her for all the clues she left concerning her true intentions.
How do you become so evil? Was she evil before she got involved in the "occult"? Is her demonic possession the result of her disobedience? Can she rid herself of this demon? Does she need an exorcist?
Is there a pastor brave enough to try and rid her of her legion of demons? No wonder she always laughed about that story in Acts where the demons beat the "would-be exorcists" and sent them running down the road bloody and naked.
She has to know that her time is up, it's over. All of that riotous wanton sinful living and fornicating, for what? Was it worth it?
The devil that helped you getaway with your "sickness", where is he now? You played god and lost. Did you believe your lies? Who did you really hate? Why did you join forces with Satan?
You know the doors of the church are open. You delivered that sentence so many times with such conviction. Why couldn't you mean it for yourself?
I am flabbergasted, a woman that can get down on her knees to gather "goofer dust" can't get down on those same knees and ask GOD to forgive her of her many sins.
Do know that you never used GOD, GOD used you. GOD is no respecter of man. GOD doesn't care what color anyone is. GOD loves all of his children. He even loves you Mathy Jane. You loved and lived the worst life imaginable, but GOD still loves you. The "door is still open."
How do you become so evil? Was she evil before she got involved in the "occult"? Is her demonic possession the result of her disobedience? Can she rid herself of this demon? Does she need an exorcist?
Is there a pastor brave enough to try and rid her of her legion of demons? No wonder she always laughed about that story in Acts where the demons beat the "would-be exorcists" and sent them running down the road bloody and naked.
She has to know that her time is up, it's over. All of that riotous wanton sinful living and fornicating, for what? Was it worth it?
The devil that helped you getaway with your "sickness", where is he now? You played god and lost. Did you believe your lies? Who did you really hate? Why did you join forces with Satan?
You know the doors of the church are open. You delivered that sentence so many times with such conviction. Why couldn't you mean it for yourself?
I am flabbergasted, a woman that can get down on her knees to gather "goofer dust" can't get down on those same knees and ask GOD to forgive her of her many sins.
Do know that you never used GOD, GOD used you. GOD is no respecter of man. GOD doesn't care what color anyone is. GOD loves all of his children. He even loves you Mathy Jane. You loved and lived the worst life imaginable, but GOD still loves you. The "door is still open."
What are you waiting on?
What are you waiting on? I know you are not waiting on GOD to rescue you. I know you are not waiting for eight-five years of lies to suddenly magically turn into the truth. You can't be waiting for me to say that it's all a lie and I made it all up for attention, that I'm jealous of you and that I am so hideously black that I turned to drugs and lost my mind.
What lies did you tell on me to protect yourself? I'm crazy, I'm a drug addict, I don't have good sense. Your doctor son is a hopeless mentally ill cocaine addict. Your *Carson baby is a hopeless drunk. All you "children" are worthless losers always begging you for money. You have never been able to get ahead in life for worthless no count niggas scheming on your money.
You poor poor lady, socially repugnant, stupid without a cause, unreachable and unteachable.
Your mother told you not to get pregnant for that "old man". You went "right on" and did it anyway. Selfish and unconcerned, no one's opinion or "laws" mattered. You didn't care about the baby or your parents. You didn't care about the community or your church.
Did your mother help you play poor innocent victim when he didn't marry you? I assure you that pretending that you were taken advantage of and that you didn't know where babies came from are the machinations of a complete social retard. A human being unfit for human companionship. You are unfit! You tried to deafen my daughter and you tried to scald her her with a hot cup of coffee! ( Why did all of your children suffer terrible burns?)
No, I know exactly what you did. GOD knows exactly what you did and why. You wanted to exalt yourself. You wanted to secure your place at the "top of the bottom". Too lazy to study and earn a degree. Too lazy to do anything but tell lies and trade your body you woke up one day and the entire world had passed you by. Not one to let your father's constant annoying admonishments prove to be correct you targeted your family. You starved your children for love and affection in order to manipulate them. According to your plan I was going to be pregnant by fourteen. Was that your age when you first got pregnant?
You intended for me to be a worse whore than you which is impossible! Only a "mother" who did not want to have successful children would have so many brilliant intelligent children. Just your luck. I know, I know, with so much talent in the family you had to turn to "roots" to stop this madness, these tremendous intellectual gifts. Forbid your genius son from attending Governor's Honors. No one cares that he was the first black student in N.C. selected.
Play crazy, play deranged, wreck havoc, no one can stop you, you're the "Queen" and nobody knows but you. The devil himself could not come up with a scheme better, more fool proof than yours. You killed that interfering a** daddy of yours and got away with it. You are eighty-five, 'bout to be eighty-six. Ha-ha-ha! Who can stop Mathy Jane?
You thought you were getting away. No one would ever be clever enough to see through you. "Shucks", most of the time you confused yourself.
I know you can't help it. Every once in a while you fall prey to the bidding of the devil. It is nothing that you have to worry about. Your debauchery has never hurt you. So what your little girl had to suffer excruciating pain to satisfy your lust.
I know you are the only person that should matter. Every one should be glad to bow down and kiss your feet. You can't help it if you're so brilliant and the entire world is dumb.
I know I am the only dummy that will challenge you. Every one else is kind enough and polite enough to wait until you die. They know how to respect the "Queen", Madame Watson, Rev-ver-rand Watson. They know better! They would not dare defy you, tell on you. They are polite enough to turn their heads. After all they only got a little taste of your treachery. Severe back stabbing was reserved for the most talented, the most ambitious, those dumb enough to think that they could escape you.
So what are you waiting on? Are you some where trying to think of your best lie? What can you say, who can you blame now?
True this is a revolting truth that no one wants to know. People must know. People must know that they have hope. People must be assured that GOD will make intercession in your life.
Of course I never wanted to know this, acknowledge this or speak a word about it. The Holy Spirit compels me. All people need to know that the devil is a trickster and he will only lead you to ruin. That's where you are, ruined, a demon sitting up in a pulpit with a license to preach in her hand and NO GOD in her heart.
LORD! this irony is incredible! She called me "stanking" for having the courage to question her. But, I can smell her right now. I can smell her through this blog. She is putrid, she smells like rotting flesh. I see her, a once beautiful woman is now hideously ugly.
I see you without your robe, I see behind your gold cross. Go ahead, defend yourself, fix this "fine mess". Eighteen years of your torture didn't destroy me. All your fine treachery, "roots", plots, scams and schemes didn't destroy me.
What is the lesson here children? You better gird up your loins. If such tragedy could befall me so harshly for so long, if I could be forced to suffer in silence for fifty-eight years you better look well to your going.
You are going to need an anchor. That anchor is the LORD Jesus Christ. Read, study, contemplate and be blessed.
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness'
Rachel
What lies did you tell on me to protect yourself? I'm crazy, I'm a drug addict, I don't have good sense. Your doctor son is a hopeless mentally ill cocaine addict. Your *Carson baby is a hopeless drunk. All you "children" are worthless losers always begging you for money. You have never been able to get ahead in life for worthless no count niggas scheming on your money.
You poor poor lady, socially repugnant, stupid without a cause, unreachable and unteachable.
Your mother told you not to get pregnant for that "old man". You went "right on" and did it anyway. Selfish and unconcerned, no one's opinion or "laws" mattered. You didn't care about the baby or your parents. You didn't care about the community or your church.
Did your mother help you play poor innocent victim when he didn't marry you? I assure you that pretending that you were taken advantage of and that you didn't know where babies came from are the machinations of a complete social retard. A human being unfit for human companionship. You are unfit! You tried to deafen my daughter and you tried to scald her her with a hot cup of coffee! ( Why did all of your children suffer terrible burns?)
No, I know exactly what you did. GOD knows exactly what you did and why. You wanted to exalt yourself. You wanted to secure your place at the "top of the bottom". Too lazy to study and earn a degree. Too lazy to do anything but tell lies and trade your body you woke up one day and the entire world had passed you by. Not one to let your father's constant annoying admonishments prove to be correct you targeted your family. You starved your children for love and affection in order to manipulate them. According to your plan I was going to be pregnant by fourteen. Was that your age when you first got pregnant?
You intended for me to be a worse whore than you which is impossible! Only a "mother" who did not want to have successful children would have so many brilliant intelligent children. Just your luck. I know, I know, with so much talent in the family you had to turn to "roots" to stop this madness, these tremendous intellectual gifts. Forbid your genius son from attending Governor's Honors. No one cares that he was the first black student in N.C. selected.
Play crazy, play deranged, wreck havoc, no one can stop you, you're the "Queen" and nobody knows but you. The devil himself could not come up with a scheme better, more fool proof than yours. You killed that interfering a** daddy of yours and got away with it. You are eighty-five, 'bout to be eighty-six. Ha-ha-ha! Who can stop Mathy Jane?
You thought you were getting away. No one would ever be clever enough to see through you. "Shucks", most of the time you confused yourself.
I know you can't help it. Every once in a while you fall prey to the bidding of the devil. It is nothing that you have to worry about. Your debauchery has never hurt you. So what your little girl had to suffer excruciating pain to satisfy your lust.
I know you are the only person that should matter. Every one should be glad to bow down and kiss your feet. You can't help it if you're so brilliant and the entire world is dumb.
I know I am the only dummy that will challenge you. Every one else is kind enough and polite enough to wait until you die. They know how to respect the "Queen", Madame Watson, Rev-ver-rand Watson. They know better! They would not dare defy you, tell on you. They are polite enough to turn their heads. After all they only got a little taste of your treachery. Severe back stabbing was reserved for the most talented, the most ambitious, those dumb enough to think that they could escape you.
So what are you waiting on? Are you some where trying to think of your best lie? What can you say, who can you blame now?
True this is a revolting truth that no one wants to know. People must know. People must know that they have hope. People must be assured that GOD will make intercession in your life.
Of course I never wanted to know this, acknowledge this or speak a word about it. The Holy Spirit compels me. All people need to know that the devil is a trickster and he will only lead you to ruin. That's where you are, ruined, a demon sitting up in a pulpit with a license to preach in her hand and NO GOD in her heart.
LORD! this irony is incredible! She called me "stanking" for having the courage to question her. But, I can smell her right now. I can smell her through this blog. She is putrid, she smells like rotting flesh. I see her, a once beautiful woman is now hideously ugly.
I see you without your robe, I see behind your gold cross. Go ahead, defend yourself, fix this "fine mess". Eighteen years of your torture didn't destroy me. All your fine treachery, "roots", plots, scams and schemes didn't destroy me.
What is the lesson here children? You better gird up your loins. If such tragedy could befall me so harshly for so long, if I could be forced to suffer in silence for fifty-eight years you better look well to your going.
You are going to need an anchor. That anchor is the LORD Jesus Christ. Read, study, contemplate and be blessed.
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness'
Rachel
Friday, May 20, 2011
I Get It! or ( A day in the life of a hypocrite)
I so get it! That old "devil" wants you so devastated, so destroyed, so defeated that it will never occur to you to get up. You can't cry long, hard or loud enough to please that old serpent.
Not one ray of hope, not one passing thought, not one dream should be good. That sick villain wants you to feel worse than "she" does. She watches very carefully. There is nothing that gets pass her. Your hair is too "Good", so she saves your head three times and taunts you about it. GOD grows your hair so long and thick that you look "strange". "Good Hair" becomes your trademark. Many don't believe its your hair because it is so thick and long and you are so black.
Why the sexual molestation? You certainly knew better. Was it worth the risk? Did you do it out of hatred, jealousy, or lust?
Did you murder your own father just to hurt her? Your daddy thought too much of her didn't he? You kept trying to prove to your daddy that she wasn't s***, that she was a worse whore than you. What did he mean by declaring ;"She ain't no such a woman as you!" 'Was he saying that this luddle shawt stanking slut is bedder den me?'
None of them are as smart as you. Why you got away with murder, "root working", lying, fornicating out of control for eighty-five years. They can't stop you! Ain't nobody 'gon believe that luddle black nigga!
"It's Friday again! I better get my Sunday school lesson ready. Dem dumb a** niggas can't even read. I don't know why I waste my time."
Not one ray of hope, not one passing thought, not one dream should be good. That sick villain wants you to feel worse than "she" does. She watches very carefully. There is nothing that gets pass her. Your hair is too "Good", so she saves your head three times and taunts you about it. GOD grows your hair so long and thick that you look "strange". "Good Hair" becomes your trademark. Many don't believe its your hair because it is so thick and long and you are so black.
Why the sexual molestation? You certainly knew better. Was it worth the risk? Did you do it out of hatred, jealousy, or lust?
Did you murder your own father just to hurt her? Your daddy thought too much of her didn't he? You kept trying to prove to your daddy that she wasn't s***, that she was a worse whore than you. What did he mean by declaring ;"She ain't no such a woman as you!" 'Was he saying that this luddle shawt stanking slut is bedder den me?'
None of them are as smart as you. Why you got away with murder, "root working", lying, fornicating out of control for eighty-five years. They can't stop you! Ain't nobody 'gon believe that luddle black nigga!
"It's Friday again! I better get my Sunday school lesson ready. Dem dumb a** niggas can't even read. I don't know why I waste my time."
Mixed Signals
Mixed signals, hot love then cold, effusing with praise and platitudes, followed by vicious vulgar attacks. Up, down, all around, do it this way, don't do it that way "dummy". "You ain't s***!" one minute "Gawd blessed me with a beautiful daughter." the next minute. Me, the only daughter was a great anointed blessing one minute, a black evil curse the next, my status with the "family" depended on her whim.
Mathy Jane, a loose canon out of control, totally out of control one minute, the fantastic orator and preacher the next. Madam Watson the famous "Root Worker" turned "precha". "Root Worker" turned preacher without notice. Who knew she knew what she was doing was wrong?
She "said" that she turned her back on that "mess". But, did she? Why would a "precha" mail her only daughter a letter full of fecal matter? Why would a "precha" become enraged with jealousy when her daughter won a house? Why would a "precha" burn with secret hatred when her daughter proclaimed GOD's glory. She went around for a year telling every one that GOD was going to bless her with a house. She told her mother exactly how she did it.
Why would any mother be envious of GOD blessing her child? What causes such stupidity?
Yes I knew. How could I not know? You never had to be so vicious in your assaults. I got your silent message loud and clear.; ('I hate you! you f****** black bitch! I wish you were f******dead. No, you can't die right now. I need you to pimp out for money. I need you to keep my pig nasty house clean. I need you to humiliate and lead into captivity. Mostly I need someone to admire me, worship me, kiss my flat yalla a** over and over.')
Oh yea I got your very subtle, very secret clandestine messages very clearly. I knew that you didn't really think that I was too black. I knew that you were just trying to destroy my self esteem. It is funny, actually quite strange, I did not know that you were a demon! I just thought you were nuts.
GOD didn't let me know your hidden agenda. He didn't let me see what a hideous creature you really are. GOD knew that I would have killed you. I was too much like you. Yes, I was murderous. I was angry. I was full of self loathing for things that were done to me that I had no control over.
GOD blessed me, He put me to "sleep", He interceded on my behalf, He protected me from Evil. I knew at two, then three, four, eight, eleven, twelve, fourteen, eighteen. Those are the years that you struck most viciously. I wasn't allowed to say anything. I was forced to take it because to tell would make you look bad, would make you get in trouble. Plus I knew "Don't you damn black a** muthaf***** tell a Muthaf**** thang dat go on in dis house!"
You pulled a forty-five on my brother for telling your young lover that you were his mother. You still pretend that that never happened. Poof! It's gone, another bad thing that you never did. Your plan for redemption is a lot easier than GOD's. The world is stupid. Every one should grow in wisdom and truth your way. Just lie, just pretend. Your sins will go away! Poof! Call all of your accuser's liars! Beat them to the punch, lie on them! Go to the graveyard, get some more dust, go to your secret alter, lie, deny, hope the bitch dies.
I was in a play once; "When you sleep with the devil come prepared to f***" by Alice Lovelace. She may never know what a great title that was, how prophetic.
I know I am not going down with a demon. I know GOD has a purpose and a plan for my life. GOD has a purpose and a plan for hers.
Stay in His WORD children. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace, and Happiness,
Rachel
Mathy Jane, a loose canon out of control, totally out of control one minute, the fantastic orator and preacher the next. Madam Watson the famous "Root Worker" turned "precha". "Root Worker" turned preacher without notice. Who knew she knew what she was doing was wrong?
She "said" that she turned her back on that "mess". But, did she? Why would a "precha" mail her only daughter a letter full of fecal matter? Why would a "precha" become enraged with jealousy when her daughter won a house? Why would a "precha" burn with secret hatred when her daughter proclaimed GOD's glory. She went around for a year telling every one that GOD was going to bless her with a house. She told her mother exactly how she did it.
Why would any mother be envious of GOD blessing her child? What causes such stupidity?
Yes I knew. How could I not know? You never had to be so vicious in your assaults. I got your silent message loud and clear.; ('I hate you! you f****** black bitch! I wish you were f******dead. No, you can't die right now. I need you to pimp out for money. I need you to keep my pig nasty house clean. I need you to humiliate and lead into captivity. Mostly I need someone to admire me, worship me, kiss my flat yalla a** over and over.')
Oh yea I got your very subtle, very secret clandestine messages very clearly. I knew that you didn't really think that I was too black. I knew that you were just trying to destroy my self esteem. It is funny, actually quite strange, I did not know that you were a demon! I just thought you were nuts.
GOD didn't let me know your hidden agenda. He didn't let me see what a hideous creature you really are. GOD knew that I would have killed you. I was too much like you. Yes, I was murderous. I was angry. I was full of self loathing for things that were done to me that I had no control over.
GOD blessed me, He put me to "sleep", He interceded on my behalf, He protected me from Evil. I knew at two, then three, four, eight, eleven, twelve, fourteen, eighteen. Those are the years that you struck most viciously. I wasn't allowed to say anything. I was forced to take it because to tell would make you look bad, would make you get in trouble. Plus I knew "Don't you damn black a** muthaf***** tell a Muthaf**** thang dat go on in dis house!"
You pulled a forty-five on my brother for telling your young lover that you were his mother. You still pretend that that never happened. Poof! It's gone, another bad thing that you never did. Your plan for redemption is a lot easier than GOD's. The world is stupid. Every one should grow in wisdom and truth your way. Just lie, just pretend. Your sins will go away! Poof! Call all of your accuser's liars! Beat them to the punch, lie on them! Go to the graveyard, get some more dust, go to your secret alter, lie, deny, hope the bitch dies.
I was in a play once; "When you sleep with the devil come prepared to f***" by Alice Lovelace. She may never know what a great title that was, how prophetic.
I know I am not going down with a demon. I know GOD has a purpose and a plan for my life. GOD has a purpose and a plan for hers.
Stay in His WORD children. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace, and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, May 19, 2011
"It shall leave them neither Root nor Branch!"
"For, behold, the day cometh, that shall burn as an oven: and all the PROUD, yea, and ALL that do WICKEDLY, shall be stubble: and the day that cometh shall burn them up, saith the LORD of hosts, that it shall leave them neither Root nor Branch."
"But unto You that Fear my NAME shall the Sun of RIGHTEOUSNESS arise with HEALING in His wings; and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall."
"And ye shall TREAD down the WICKED; for they shall be ashes under the soles of your feet in the day that I shall do THIS, saith the LORD of hosts." (Malachi 4: 1 - 3)
How dare you! How dare you pretend to be so ignorant! You are not dumb enough to believe the rot you sell. You lived a sick heinous life just because you could. You did it because you felt like it. You did it because you are Evil! Evil and jealous, not a good combination.
You pretend to be so outraged and shocked by my allegations. Like you have a stellar reputation. "She'd (screw) a snake if ya held his head." That's what you always said about your first cousin. That always bothered me; your lack of loyalty. How could you profess to love your "fabulous" first cousin so much and turn around and talk about her like a dog?
Well, I dropped by to tell you; you did it to yourself. You have no excuse. You hit rock bottom early in life and never tried to get up. I apologize, I was wrong, you are not a closet lesbian. You hate women! You are truly a "Hater". You hate every one and everything.
No you can't be a lesbian because "lesbians" love women and most lesbians and most women are members of a secret society; a "Sisterhood". Women have always nurtured, groomed and guided other women. Older women take the young girls under their wings to teach them about "Womanhood".
The "Sisterhood" reviles you! No woman on this earth can excuse what you did. You have no choice! You must repent. If you don't repent you will reveal yourself to be the worse common whore ever imagined.
Woman! greedy selfish Marie Antoinette was beheaded for saying "Let them eat cake!"
How dare you! You may have been attractive but you have never been that pretty. No one is that pretty.
Thank You for Your WORD LORD! Thank You for the gift of intercession. She thought she was getting over, she thought she was getting away. Dear LORD it looks like you were giving her enough rope to hang herself.
Oh you did rip and run. You did everything you could. It seems you committed ever sick crime that crossed your mind. You can put on fine robes and solid gold crosses but nothing can camouflage your countenance.
"But unto You that Fear my NAME shall the Sun of RIGHTEOUSNESS arise with HEALING in His wings; and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall."
"And ye shall TREAD down the WICKED; for they shall be ashes under the soles of your feet in the day that I shall do THIS, saith the LORD of hosts." (Malachi 4: 1 - 3)
How dare you! How dare you pretend to be so ignorant! You are not dumb enough to believe the rot you sell. You lived a sick heinous life just because you could. You did it because you felt like it. You did it because you are Evil! Evil and jealous, not a good combination.
You pretend to be so outraged and shocked by my allegations. Like you have a stellar reputation. "She'd (screw) a snake if ya held his head." That's what you always said about your first cousin. That always bothered me; your lack of loyalty. How could you profess to love your "fabulous" first cousin so much and turn around and talk about her like a dog?
Well, I dropped by to tell you; you did it to yourself. You have no excuse. You hit rock bottom early in life and never tried to get up. I apologize, I was wrong, you are not a closet lesbian. You hate women! You are truly a "Hater". You hate every one and everything.
No you can't be a lesbian because "lesbians" love women and most lesbians and most women are members of a secret society; a "Sisterhood". Women have always nurtured, groomed and guided other women. Older women take the young girls under their wings to teach them about "Womanhood".
The "Sisterhood" reviles you! No woman on this earth can excuse what you did. You have no choice! You must repent. If you don't repent you will reveal yourself to be the worse common whore ever imagined.
Woman! greedy selfish Marie Antoinette was beheaded for saying "Let them eat cake!"
How dare you! You may have been attractive but you have never been that pretty. No one is that pretty.
Thank You for Your WORD LORD! Thank You for the gift of intercession. She thought she was getting over, she thought she was getting away. Dear LORD it looks like you were giving her enough rope to hang herself.
Oh you did rip and run. You did everything you could. It seems you committed ever sick crime that crossed your mind. You can put on fine robes and solid gold crosses but nothing can camouflage your countenance.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
The word for the day is vacuous
The word for today is VAC-U-OUS - to be empty, lacking content.
I know too many people that are totally vacuous, empty, lacking content, lacking character. They say that there is honor among thieves. Not all of them. Some thieves are exactly what they do not claim to be, thieves. Low life common robbers, a generation of vipers.
When you hear a person declare; "No, that's not me. I am not that kind of person." That is your signal to run. Alarms and sirens should go off in your head. Accept the fact that too many common people are crawling around on this earth victimising the innocent. Imps for the devil they are bent on destruction. It is too late, there is nothing that you can do for them.
You can't help a person that pretends to hear. They put that garb on to please you. All those expensive robes are for show. They endure long church services that they truly loathe to be seen. Nothing upsets them more than to be ignored. Anger over takes them if they are not lauded, hugged and kissed. They brag on themselves so you will follow suit.
Children we are talking about a very small person. Some one that never grew. Some one so terrified the only thing they know how to do well is destroy. Secretly ashamed that she destroyed her own life nothing pleases her more than to watch your life unravel and crumble. Brilliant in her guile she will pray with you and for you before you goes to her secret alter. A hideous demon she will make you wretch.
Attention all demons! You can not stop GOD's plan. You can not alter the book. You will reap exactly what you sowed! We must all give in account to GOD for our deeds, every single deed.
Do you need wisdom? Pray for it. Need forgiveness? Pray for it.
"Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespasses against us And deliver us from EVIL!..."
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I know too many people that are totally vacuous, empty, lacking content, lacking character. They say that there is honor among thieves. Not all of them. Some thieves are exactly what they do not claim to be, thieves. Low life common robbers, a generation of vipers.
When you hear a person declare; "No, that's not me. I am not that kind of person." That is your signal to run. Alarms and sirens should go off in your head. Accept the fact that too many common people are crawling around on this earth victimising the innocent. Imps for the devil they are bent on destruction. It is too late, there is nothing that you can do for them.
You can't help a person that pretends to hear. They put that garb on to please you. All those expensive robes are for show. They endure long church services that they truly loathe to be seen. Nothing upsets them more than to be ignored. Anger over takes them if they are not lauded, hugged and kissed. They brag on themselves so you will follow suit.
Children we are talking about a very small person. Some one that never grew. Some one so terrified the only thing they know how to do well is destroy. Secretly ashamed that she destroyed her own life nothing pleases her more than to watch your life unravel and crumble. Brilliant in her guile she will pray with you and for you before you goes to her secret alter. A hideous demon she will make you wretch.
Attention all demons! You can not stop GOD's plan. You can not alter the book. You will reap exactly what you sowed! We must all give in account to GOD for our deeds, every single deed.
Do you need wisdom? Pray for it. Need forgiveness? Pray for it.
"Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespasses against us And deliver us from EVIL!..."
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
"Is you is or is you ain't?"
"Is you is or is you ain't? What? Is you is or is you ain't, my baby?"; was one of my "mother's" jokes. It was hilarious, the jovial banter between my 'mother" and my stepfather was light hearted and romantic. They laughed, hugged and kissed, acted like any newly married couple. Except they had a dark side, a sick perversion, involving children in their sexual escapades.
Just what did they think was going to happen? Just how retarded was I suppose to be? My "mother" was the ring leader, she was behind it. Dead set on punishing me for being born she was determined to make me suffer every time my "sorry a**" daddy crossed her mind.
Punishment! You sick f***ing slut! You are not that dumb. You know damn well why *Charles did not marry your whorish a**. You cussed him, beat him and whored around on him. Why would he want to marry you? What man or woman can be married to a whore?
The irony is that being called a whore would send you into a demonic tirade. You still are a whore, Whore! Hell, if you are a whore, be a whore. "Be what you are and live your life."
Did you expect to lie your way out of your deeds the rest of your life? Your lies are the TRUTH and Jesus is the Anti-Christ. The whole world is wrong and only you are right. Bow down and kiss your ring.
I just can't believe anyone is still stupid enough to take your crap. I can't believe that people are still afraid of you.
I can't part my lips to you. I can't stand to look at you. I understand why I refused to accept the TRUTH for so long. This TRUTH is too ugly, too foul, too painful.
You are a woman of very little faith. You were determined that no man was ever going to stop you from doing anything that you wanted to do. You pimped me out to *Carson so that you would be guaranteed a husband. He would never be able to leave you like the blind man did.
I guess I was a knot. "Tie a knot in that niggas a**!"; you were very fond of advising.
You had to know that this day was coming. You could never destroy me. Shame on you for trying.
There are many that think the world is going to end May 21, 2011. No man can do that, predict the time. I do know that it is all in Divine Order. Whenever the world ends we should all be ready to go.
I'm still healing, still holding on. GOD is strengthening me. I do get weary sometime. This is the worse TRUTH anyone could ever know. But, I know that "Jesus will fix it."
"Keep yourself up much as you can."
Just what did they think was going to happen? Just how retarded was I suppose to be? My "mother" was the ring leader, she was behind it. Dead set on punishing me for being born she was determined to make me suffer every time my "sorry a**" daddy crossed her mind.
Punishment! You sick f***ing slut! You are not that dumb. You know damn well why *Charles did not marry your whorish a**. You cussed him, beat him and whored around on him. Why would he want to marry you? What man or woman can be married to a whore?
The irony is that being called a whore would send you into a demonic tirade. You still are a whore, Whore! Hell, if you are a whore, be a whore. "Be what you are and live your life."
Did you expect to lie your way out of your deeds the rest of your life? Your lies are the TRUTH and Jesus is the Anti-Christ. The whole world is wrong and only you are right. Bow down and kiss your ring.
I just can't believe anyone is still stupid enough to take your crap. I can't believe that people are still afraid of you.
I can't part my lips to you. I can't stand to look at you. I understand why I refused to accept the TRUTH for so long. This TRUTH is too ugly, too foul, too painful.
You are a woman of very little faith. You were determined that no man was ever going to stop you from doing anything that you wanted to do. You pimped me out to *Carson so that you would be guaranteed a husband. He would never be able to leave you like the blind man did.
I guess I was a knot. "Tie a knot in that niggas a**!"; you were very fond of advising.
You had to know that this day was coming. You could never destroy me. Shame on you for trying.
There are many that think the world is going to end May 21, 2011. No man can do that, predict the time. I do know that it is all in Divine Order. Whenever the world ends we should all be ready to go.
I'm still healing, still holding on. GOD is strengthening me. I do get weary sometime. This is the worse TRUTH anyone could ever know. But, I know that "Jesus will fix it."
"Keep yourself up much as you can."
Monday, May 16, 2011
"I FEEL GOOD!"
"Ah-h-h fe-e-e-e-eeel go-o-o-od!" I wish you could hear me singing. I am so thankful and grateful to GOD I am out of my mind. I am so humbled by GOD's goodness and mercy that I am trembling. How can I explain it to you? Where do I start? Let me give you the shortest version I can.
The simple fact is this; a cold manipulative heartless demonic narcissist has held her entire family captive for eighty-five years! This story is incredible. I would not believe a word of it if I hadn't lived it.
Bottom line, my "mother" is a very clever wicked woman, she is a con artist. She is a nigga. I do use the "n" word here as a pejorative. A nigga is the commonest, lowest creature on earth. The word nigga has nothing to do with color, it is character. I consider all immoral low life people to be niggas.
There are some that blame "niggerism" on slavery. I don't, slavery is a very convenient excuse. There are too many people that hide behind their skin color to commit sick hedonistic deeds.
There are too many people walking around in robes wearing titles that they gave themselves. They freely anoint themselves with mis-identifying names like Bishop, Prophet, Prophetess, Reverend, Elder, Mother of the church, and minister.
Why are we impressed? Jesus told you to look at their fruit! Do not turn a blind eye to their fruit. Their fruit can't lie. My head and heart are bursting with hundreds of
the worst possible images and memories any human being could be forced to endure.
My fate, the fate of my family revolves around a very fractured woman. Born beautiful , brilliant and "high yalla" in a very racist world in 1925 she grew into a monster. Her life is more than fascinating it is spellbinding.
Something happened to my mother and she spiraled out of control, "Waxed worse and worse." Her life is the exact opposite of what it seems. Poor Mathy Jane is a closeted lesbian, sadist, pathological liar, Tarot card reader, "Rooting Working" preacher. A born schemer that most people laugh at and with, not knowing her true nature. They do not know that she is blacker than a thousand midnights on the inside. She is a trickster, she will fleece and flim flam you. Unfortunately she used her greatest talents to destroy her own family. She will betray you and she will not blink. She has no honor.
She is a hilarious comedienne, she should have been a joke writer.
I wanted to love her but she proved too dangerous. She will put graveyard dirt on you, hug and kiss you while she stabs you in the back. Some where along her way she got very lost and murdered her daddy.
I loved her daddy, my grandfather, Jerome Walters. He is the only reason I can hold my head up. He is the only reason I can truly call myself a blessed saved Christian.
I love you granddaddy and I am going to clear your name and honor you. Yes, granddaddy I hear you; "Jesus will fix it!" "Time changes all things."
Stay His WORD Children. Jesus will lift you up I am a living witness! He plucked me up out of the much and the mire. Praise the LORD!!!
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
The simple fact is this; a cold manipulative heartless demonic narcissist has held her entire family captive for eighty-five years! This story is incredible. I would not believe a word of it if I hadn't lived it.
Bottom line, my "mother" is a very clever wicked woman, she is a con artist. She is a nigga. I do use the "n" word here as a pejorative. A nigga is the commonest, lowest creature on earth. The word nigga has nothing to do with color, it is character. I consider all immoral low life people to be niggas.
There are some that blame "niggerism" on slavery. I don't, slavery is a very convenient excuse. There are too many people that hide behind their skin color to commit sick hedonistic deeds.
There are too many people walking around in robes wearing titles that they gave themselves. They freely anoint themselves with mis-identifying names like Bishop, Prophet, Prophetess, Reverend, Elder, Mother of the church, and minister.
Why are we impressed? Jesus told you to look at their fruit! Do not turn a blind eye to their fruit. Their fruit can't lie. My head and heart are bursting with hundreds of
the worst possible images and memories any human being could be forced to endure.
My fate, the fate of my family revolves around a very fractured woman. Born beautiful , brilliant and "high yalla" in a very racist world in 1925 she grew into a monster. Her life is more than fascinating it is spellbinding.
Something happened to my mother and she spiraled out of control, "Waxed worse and worse." Her life is the exact opposite of what it seems. Poor Mathy Jane is a closeted lesbian, sadist, pathological liar, Tarot card reader, "Rooting Working" preacher. A born schemer that most people laugh at and with, not knowing her true nature. They do not know that she is blacker than a thousand midnights on the inside. She is a trickster, she will fleece and flim flam you. Unfortunately she used her greatest talents to destroy her own family. She will betray you and she will not blink. She has no honor.
She is a hilarious comedienne, she should have been a joke writer.
I wanted to love her but she proved too dangerous. She will put graveyard dirt on you, hug and kiss you while she stabs you in the back. Some where along her way she got very lost and murdered her daddy.
I loved her daddy, my grandfather, Jerome Walters. He is the only reason I can hold my head up. He is the only reason I can truly call myself a blessed saved Christian.
I love you granddaddy and I am going to clear your name and honor you. Yes, granddaddy I hear you; "Jesus will fix it!" "Time changes all things."
Stay His WORD Children. Jesus will lift you up I am a living witness! He plucked me up out of the much and the mire. Praise the LORD!!!
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Sunday, May 15, 2011
You don't want this
I have witnessed many friends suffer with cancer. Some pulled through, some gave up, some put on a gallant fight. A few of my acquaintances died of A.I.D.s. It was horrible to see. No, I don't have cancer, but I have suffered just the same. You don't want what I have. You do not want any part of this generational curse.
The good news is that generational curses can be broken. Some one in the family has to have sense enough to know that a "lie" can not lead you to the TRUTH. Some one in the family has to show courage and spit in the devil's eye.
There are some in my family that have advised me to wait until "she" dies. What would be the point of that? Why accuse her when she is not around to defend herself? As wicked as she is, even she deserves the opportunity to repent of her sins.
I am not GOD, I can't say if she will or won't. I know what the Bible says.
Children do know that your "friends" and "family" will rebuke you. They will forsake you in a heartbeat. There are people that will give up the right for the wrong . They will go along to get along. They can't think for themselves. Their feet are swift to run to mischief. They glory in the pain of others. There are some that are blind and refuse to see, deaf and won't hear.
Do what ever you want to do. Do what ever you are big enough to do. Do know that you will reap what you sow, "You will get your just and honest due on this planet Earth."
You might con "them" into thinking that you are ashamed. I know that you don't care. But, to quote you; "GOD sits high but he looks low."
Look low LORD, deliver us from evil.
Stay in His WORD children. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember; "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
The good news is that generational curses can be broken. Some one in the family has to have sense enough to know that a "lie" can not lead you to the TRUTH. Some one in the family has to show courage and spit in the devil's eye.
There are some in my family that have advised me to wait until "she" dies. What would be the point of that? Why accuse her when she is not around to defend herself? As wicked as she is, even she deserves the opportunity to repent of her sins.
I am not GOD, I can't say if she will or won't. I know what the Bible says.
Children do know that your "friends" and "family" will rebuke you. They will forsake you in a heartbeat. There are people that will give up the right for the wrong . They will go along to get along. They can't think for themselves. Their feet are swift to run to mischief. They glory in the pain of others. There are some that are blind and refuse to see, deaf and won't hear.
Do what ever you want to do. Do what ever you are big enough to do. Do know that you will reap what you sow, "You will get your just and honest due on this planet Earth."
You might con "them" into thinking that you are ashamed. I know that you don't care. But, to quote you; "GOD sits high but he looks low."
Look low LORD, deliver us from evil.
Stay in His WORD children. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember; "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I just tried to keep living
I just tried to keep living. I knew something wasn't right. I was five but even I knew what they were doing was shameful, something low and disgraceful. There was all kinds of abuse, but I kept moving forward. I made good grades and good decisions. But nothing ever stopped her. Nothing could make her proud. Every milestone I achieved made her hate me more. I knew the sneaky "wench" was going to win again and again. I knew that if there was something that I wanted or something that I loved or admired I better not let her know. She would steal it and destroy it, mangle and mutilate it.
How do you grow to maturity, whole and intact with an evil skank demon for a "mother"? You can't on your own. You must have the Hand of GOD upon you. You must listen to GOD's voice. You must let GOD lead and guide you.
So here we are Mathy Jane. Are you ashamed yet? Are you still heartless? Are you still professing to be blessed? Do you still climb up in pulpits praying and preaching? Are you scared? Do you think you can live long enough to reap what you sowed?
Can you even remember all of the cruel sick things that you have done? My grandfather promised me that "Jesus will fix it" and I know he will.
Dear LORD, thank you for your intercession, revelation, and protection. Thank you for righting wrongs. Thank you for protecting the little children. Build a fence all around them.
Stay in His WORD children. Be blessed.
How do you grow to maturity, whole and intact with an evil skank demon for a "mother"? You can't on your own. You must have the Hand of GOD upon you. You must listen to GOD's voice. You must let GOD lead and guide you.
So here we are Mathy Jane. Are you ashamed yet? Are you still heartless? Are you still professing to be blessed? Do you still climb up in pulpits praying and preaching? Are you scared? Do you think you can live long enough to reap what you sowed?
Can you even remember all of the cruel sick things that you have done? My grandfather promised me that "Jesus will fix it" and I know he will.
Dear LORD, thank you for your intercession, revelation, and protection. Thank you for righting wrongs. Thank you for protecting the little children. Build a fence all around them.
Stay in His WORD children. Be blessed.
I thought that I was alone in my pain.
I thought that I was alone in my pain until I Googled it. "Mothers who hate their daughters" was my topic. It seems our world is over run with common low class women that live double lives for the pleasure of the pain they inflict. To know that there are millions more that have suffered in silence like I have is not comforting.
One particular post was startling, it was perfect, it was on point. "Greed is an unquenchable desire---a bottomless pit of wanting that never ends. Narcissists ruthlessly strive, plan and connive for what they want and must have." That's her! That's my "mother".
So greedy for the little money her medical doctor son was earning that she plotted and schemed until she finally went too far and hatched a demonic scheme that kept him estranged from his family for twenty five years.
"They will destroy the professions and lives of other human beings, including members of their own families, to reach their goals. When a narcissist fulfills some of his/her desires---professionally, romantically, financially, through ruthlessness and cunning, he is satisfied briefly. But their compulsion to have more takes over and his obsession awakens....The narcissist will betray anyone--spouses, siblings, their own children, treating them like objects who have neither value nor feelings."
This is all true. This explains the murder of her own father. "The narcissist will betray anyone." I know because that woman has betrayed me over and over. But, any woman that would serve up her little girl sexually is less than human, part human, part maggot.
A textbook case of narcissism. Reading this post is like reading my own biography. "Most Narcissists are obsessed with their image....In private, narcissists act with malicious cruelty..."
Malicious cruelty! that's her! all the brutal beatings and sexual perversion.
This truth sickens me but I will not tolerate it. I will not play her games. She loves to call you on the phone cooing and setting you up for more sick torture. I will not go along, I will not pretend any more. She can call herself an ordained minister if she wants to, she can't fool me. Any one calling on her and asking for her prayers and blessings is lost.
Psychiatrists may diagnose you as a narcissist, we both know better. You are a sick delusional demon, you and your followers. I don't know every thing. I might not know a lot but I know that no person that loves GOD will defend and honor you.
Thank you LORD for delivering us from Evil.
Do know that it is not over. It is all in Divine Order.
Honor GOD with your life. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
One particular post was startling, it was perfect, it was on point. "Greed is an unquenchable desire---a bottomless pit of wanting that never ends. Narcissists ruthlessly strive, plan and connive for what they want and must have." That's her! That's my "mother".
So greedy for the little money her medical doctor son was earning that she plotted and schemed until she finally went too far and hatched a demonic scheme that kept him estranged from his family for twenty five years.
"They will destroy the professions and lives of other human beings, including members of their own families, to reach their goals. When a narcissist fulfills some of his/her desires---professionally, romantically, financially, through ruthlessness and cunning, he is satisfied briefly. But their compulsion to have more takes over and his obsession awakens....The narcissist will betray anyone--spouses, siblings, their own children, treating them like objects who have neither value nor feelings."
This is all true. This explains the murder of her own father. "The narcissist will betray anyone." I know because that woman has betrayed me over and over. But, any woman that would serve up her little girl sexually is less than human, part human, part maggot.
A textbook case of narcissism. Reading this post is like reading my own biography. "Most Narcissists are obsessed with their image....In private, narcissists act with malicious cruelty..."
Malicious cruelty! that's her! all the brutal beatings and sexual perversion.
This truth sickens me but I will not tolerate it. I will not play her games. She loves to call you on the phone cooing and setting you up for more sick torture. I will not go along, I will not pretend any more. She can call herself an ordained minister if she wants to, she can't fool me. Any one calling on her and asking for her prayers and blessings is lost.
Psychiatrists may diagnose you as a narcissist, we both know better. You are a sick delusional demon, you and your followers. I don't know every thing. I might not know a lot but I know that no person that loves GOD will defend and honor you.
Thank you LORD for delivering us from Evil.
Do know that it is not over. It is all in Divine Order.
Honor GOD with your life. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, May 12, 2011
"It is what it is"
"It is what it is", you can't change it. The best thing you can do is accept it and move on. Embrace the TRUTH! I found out that I can't handle the TRUTH, just like that line by Jack Nicholson. As hard as my TRUTH is to bear I can not abide a lie. I will not lie for you. I will not lie for any one, I never have and I never will. I figure if you do something wrong you should own it, correct yourself and move forward.
I do have a problem, I absolutely hate liars. I have no patience for liars. I don't get it. Why do you continue to lie when every one knows that you are lying? You should not lie. Lies stem from fear. Why are you afraid? What are you running from? You can run but you can't hide. The clock is ticking for all of us. "We didn't come here to stay always." What are you going to do when your time runs out?
No, I don't know how this thing is going to play out. I do know that GOD won! I know you got to be an ignorant somebody to attempt to put your little pea brain up against GOD. That's some serious possession. I understand your fear family. Don't come near this demon without your armor on. Come prayed up with your Holy oil. Fast and pray. There are some demons on this earth running to and fro seeking whom they shall destroy.
Get your head out of the clouds, look around you. Don't believe me, Google it!
GOD is moving, it all is in Divine Order. Where are you? Are you a little weak wimpy "Christian" depending on luck, a handout. Are you so scared and confused that you are serving GOD and man?
He said that He is coming back like a thief in the night. Are you ready? How's your house? What's in your closet? What's really in your heart? Do you go out of your way to hurt people? Is there any hatred in your heart? Do you lie? Have you borne false witness against your neighbor, against your daughter, against your father?
Dear LORD, thank you for your WORD. Thank you for reversing this generational curse. Touch minds and hearts LORD. "And they all were on one accord."
Seize the moment. Be richly blessed.
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I do have a problem, I absolutely hate liars. I have no patience for liars. I don't get it. Why do you continue to lie when every one knows that you are lying? You should not lie. Lies stem from fear. Why are you afraid? What are you running from? You can run but you can't hide. The clock is ticking for all of us. "We didn't come here to stay always." What are you going to do when your time runs out?
No, I don't know how this thing is going to play out. I do know that GOD won! I know you got to be an ignorant somebody to attempt to put your little pea brain up against GOD. That's some serious possession. I understand your fear family. Don't come near this demon without your armor on. Come prayed up with your Holy oil. Fast and pray. There are some demons on this earth running to and fro seeking whom they shall destroy.
Get your head out of the clouds, look around you. Don't believe me, Google it!
GOD is moving, it all is in Divine Order. Where are you? Are you a little weak wimpy "Christian" depending on luck, a handout. Are you so scared and confused that you are serving GOD and man?
He said that He is coming back like a thief in the night. Are you ready? How's your house? What's in your closet? What's really in your heart? Do you go out of your way to hurt people? Is there any hatred in your heart? Do you lie? Have you borne false witness against your neighbor, against your daughter, against your father?
Dear LORD, thank you for your WORD. Thank you for reversing this generational curse. Touch minds and hearts LORD. "And they all were on one accord."
Seize the moment. Be richly blessed.
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
It is all in divine order
I tell you that it all in divine order and there is nothing that you can do or undo. You can thank GOD. You can be humbled by the goodness of GOD. "You can't make me doubt him." Some of our ancestors knew it. Praise the Lord!
GOD's anointed WORD is your GPS. You can not go wrong, and if you do not follow GOD's WORD you can't get right or do right. I know because I have a testimony. I survived! I made it! A demon set me up, prepared me to be a demonic sacrifice. But, the devil didn't know or didn't care that GOD's hand was upon me. GOD was right there with me when you did the unspeakable.
As terrible as my "mother" is I actually do "love" her. She is hilarious if she is not your mother and she is not targeting you. We always found a lot to laugh about in our pain. She is found of quoting the scripture form Romans; "We all have sinned and come short..." I can't believe it! She has the nerve to put herself in the same category as "ordinary" sinners.
Mo "Mother Dear" you were a pioneer in debauchery. You did things that haven't been done yet.
You are an enigma. Courageous and cowardly at the same time. Lying and truth telling, loving and hating. You made some terrible mistakes and because you were too cunning to get your just punishment you waxed worse and worse. That's why you are where you are today, an eighty-five year old pre-adolescent.
No, you are not the only "blind, deaf and dumb" imp for the devil. But, you are an imp that knows GOD's TRUTH.
Granddaddy told you your entire life and I am telling you now; "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
GOD's anointed WORD is your GPS. You can not go wrong, and if you do not follow GOD's WORD you can't get right or do right. I know because I have a testimony. I survived! I made it! A demon set me up, prepared me to be a demonic sacrifice. But, the devil didn't know or didn't care that GOD's hand was upon me. GOD was right there with me when you did the unspeakable.
As terrible as my "mother" is I actually do "love" her. She is hilarious if she is not your mother and she is not targeting you. We always found a lot to laugh about in our pain. She is found of quoting the scripture form Romans; "We all have sinned and come short..." I can't believe it! She has the nerve to put herself in the same category as "ordinary" sinners.
Mo "Mother Dear" you were a pioneer in debauchery. You did things that haven't been done yet.
You are an enigma. Courageous and cowardly at the same time. Lying and truth telling, loving and hating. You made some terrible mistakes and because you were too cunning to get your just punishment you waxed worse and worse. That's why you are where you are today, an eighty-five year old pre-adolescent.
No, you are not the only "blind, deaf and dumb" imp for the devil. But, you are an imp that knows GOD's TRUTH.
Granddaddy told you your entire life and I am telling you now; "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
He was just a good man
I don't know how many people can say it? I know that I can say it proudly; "My grandfather was a good man!" He was honest and he loved the LORD. He loved his family. My grandfather stood for love, he was kind and up lifting. That fact is very special to me. I will soon be sixty years old and I can count the number of good men I've met on one hand. Some say that my standards are set way too high. No, too many people have very low expectations.
If you are an honest person you should demand honesty from your friends and associates. Don't let people get mad and "cuss" you out in order to manipulate you. If you are being lied to do not turn a blind eye. Do not compromise, do not shrink in order to be accepted.
Admit that you need guidance. Seek it! Read your Bible! I tell you lazy non-reading "Christians" will suffer. Slow learners will suffer. I know it for a fact because I am a slow learner. But, I learned. I learned, accepted the TRUTH and now I am moving on.
Do not let any thing or any one take your joy. Do know that the devil wants to ruin you, devastate you. The devil is a liar and a coward. The good news is that the devil is defeated. Only the totally destitute, "blind", "cripple" and crazy hold on to him. Only the weakest miserable wretches fear him.
Start today. Thank the LORD for the indwelling of His Holy Spirit. Thank Him for courage. Thank Him for reversing generational curses.
Dear LORD thank you for another opportunity to serve you. Thank you for your tender mercies. TOUCH! Touch us LORD. Pour out your anointing. Rain down on us Father!
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
If you are an honest person you should demand honesty from your friends and associates. Don't let people get mad and "cuss" you out in order to manipulate you. If you are being lied to do not turn a blind eye. Do not compromise, do not shrink in order to be accepted.
Admit that you need guidance. Seek it! Read your Bible! I tell you lazy non-reading "Christians" will suffer. Slow learners will suffer. I know it for a fact because I am a slow learner. But, I learned. I learned, accepted the TRUTH and now I am moving on.
Do not let any thing or any one take your joy. Do know that the devil wants to ruin you, devastate you. The devil is a liar and a coward. The good news is that the devil is defeated. Only the totally destitute, "blind", "cripple" and crazy hold on to him. Only the weakest miserable wretches fear him.
Start today. Thank the LORD for the indwelling of His Holy Spirit. Thank Him for courage. Thank Him for reversing generational curses.
Dear LORD thank you for another opportunity to serve you. Thank you for your tender mercies. TOUCH! Touch us LORD. Pour out your anointing. Rain down on us Father!
Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Come Ye Out From Among Them!
"Come ye out from among them." You better listen! Or should I say that it would behove you to take heed. Some can learn from the experiences of others, some can't learn from any experience. I think many of us keep making the same mistakes over and over.
Why can't we learn? Why can't we listen? Why is it that people who exercise very poor judgment never learn, never catch on? I hope that is not me. Like most people I can see what is wrong with everyone else but find it very difficult to find anything wrong with me. I have a good reason for all of my faults like every one else.
But, "Come ye out from among them." is what Jesus said. I am a person that is going to do what Jesus said. I hope most people feel that way. What a great world we would have if every one did what the Bible says Jesus said.
It is important that you base your actions on the WORD and the Spirit. It is more important that you read it for yourself! Too many of us are easily duped into believing certain myths about Jesus' character and desires.
First of all Jesus was a Revolutionary! I don't believe in this wimpy Jesus portrayed in the movies and television. My Jesus got you told and showed no fear. My Jesus could be a little hostile if needed. Remember how he threw the "money changers" out of the temple.
My Jesus does not want us to suffer like Job. We don't have to put up with demons and liars in our families because they are kin. Jesus told us that our enemies would be in our own households. So, why aren't we listening?
"Come ye out from among them." I take that all the way. I am no longer black, I am HUMAN! I first declared that I am Human ONLY on the 2000 Census. Don't "group" me with anyone! Do not assume that I am going to ack a certain way or think a cerain way because I am "black" or female or grew up in the south or I have a big butt. I am a unique brilliant person! I am human! My color is related to my culture, which I may or may not enbrace. I define Me, not You!
I am not female, I am not old, I am not Democrat or Republican. I am a human being in quest of life. I want to live to the fullest, travel, write, paint, do what ever I feel, when ever I feel like it. That's Life. If you can't have Life, why are you living? You are not living you are existing, "scratching and surviving"
LIVE!!! Learn to think and act for yourself, don't be a safe, go along to get along coon.
Remember, stay in His WORD, read your Bible. "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Why can't we learn? Why can't we listen? Why is it that people who exercise very poor judgment never learn, never catch on? I hope that is not me. Like most people I can see what is wrong with everyone else but find it very difficult to find anything wrong with me. I have a good reason for all of my faults like every one else.
But, "Come ye out from among them." is what Jesus said. I am a person that is going to do what Jesus said. I hope most people feel that way. What a great world we would have if every one did what the Bible says Jesus said.
It is important that you base your actions on the WORD and the Spirit. It is more important that you read it for yourself! Too many of us are easily duped into believing certain myths about Jesus' character and desires.
First of all Jesus was a Revolutionary! I don't believe in this wimpy Jesus portrayed in the movies and television. My Jesus got you told and showed no fear. My Jesus could be a little hostile if needed. Remember how he threw the "money changers" out of the temple.
My Jesus does not want us to suffer like Job. We don't have to put up with demons and liars in our families because they are kin. Jesus told us that our enemies would be in our own households. So, why aren't we listening?
"Come ye out from among them." I take that all the way. I am no longer black, I am HUMAN! I first declared that I am Human ONLY on the 2000 Census. Don't "group" me with anyone! Do not assume that I am going to ack a certain way or think a cerain way because I am "black" or female or grew up in the south or I have a big butt. I am a unique brilliant person! I am human! My color is related to my culture, which I may or may not enbrace. I define Me, not You!
I am not female, I am not old, I am not Democrat or Republican. I am a human being in quest of life. I want to live to the fullest, travel, write, paint, do what ever I feel, when ever I feel like it. That's Life. If you can't have Life, why are you living? You are not living you are existing, "scratching and surviving"
LIVE!!! Learn to think and act for yourself, don't be a safe, go along to get along coon.
Remember, stay in His WORD, read your Bible. "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
My tears are not for me, they are for you.
If you went to church Sunday and your pastor didn't mention living right you should have stayed home in the bed.
Jesus threw the money changers and dove sellers out of the church. If people in the church were wicked two thousand years ago when Jesus walked this earth in the flesh, we can only imagine how many demons have infiltrated the church since His ascension.
Preach the WORD in season and out. Tell people the TRUTH! Do not put up with wrong doing. Do not let demons intimidate you.
You have to live right, you have to love the LORD, you have to love your neighbors, and your enemies. That's it, plain and simple. So, why is it so hard?
It's hard because some didn't read the Book, some don't believe what's in the Book. Some people only believe what they see. That's bad for people who have only seen wrong doing.
I know what I know. I know GOD loves me. I know GOD set me apart. I know GOD saved me from a terrible fate. She was on her way. She had me and she had me good and I was going to suffer mightily. That was her plan. She was smart, she was pretty, she was the right color and she was sneaky. But, I believe she made her move too soon. Her sexual exploitation of me began too soon so I didn't become that great low class whore that she expected. Brutalized and called filthy names made we want to be somebody.
"Man" you can do a lot of things, but you can't fool GOD. Don't think because you crept up on eighty-five years of "life" that you got over, that you are going to get away. Your sorry life proves that you lost.
You remind me of the story of King Solomon and his wise decision to cut the disputed baby in half. Of course the woman who was not the real mother did not object to the King's cruel decision.
You laugh at me and ridicule me. You corral your posse against me. My relatives revile me and ostracize me. You laugh and taunt me. You send me foul messages and veiled threats. You continue to laugh. You couldn't care less you announce.
That's where you don't get it. That's where you reveal yourself to the careful listener. No real mother would say the kinds of things you say about their child.
Just so you know, I always knew you hated me. I know, you wanted me to know. You just didn't want prying eyes to know. Not that you felt any guilt, not that you were going to suffer from a tarnished image. You didn't want other people to know simply because you felt that it was none of their business.
Let me say this real plain. I don't like you and I don't like people like you, dumb ignorant sneaky demons that are only successful in making their loved ones miserable.
*Verlean made a special trip to your house on Dwain Drive. She was obviously very upset, *Leo was in the veterans hospital in Durham facing some very serious surgery. *Verlean gave you all the details and left.
I wasn't surprised by the way you talked about her when she left. I was surprised when you said that you were not going to the VA to see *Leo. I was surprised when you told me how much you hated him. I was shocked when you told me that HE had ruined your life.
I begged you, you relented and we drove to the VA in your long Sedan de'Ville Cadillac. I will never forget that day, a one hundred and ninety degree turn around. They were wheeling him into recovery by the time we got there. You started screaming and crying. You put on an academy award performance; "Dat's my son! Dat's my Son!!!"
Neither one of us recognized it, but I learned a lot about you that day. You are nothing but a lying phony. "A man that will lie, will steal. A man that will steal will kill."
There you were putting on a performance, lying and crying over a son that you secretly hate. Who else do you secretly hate? Well your secrets are out. You are nothing but a low life black hearted "root worker" who has never been anything but evil her entire life.
Something is wrong with you and it has been wrong your entire life. Someone knew that you should have never been permitted to be a mother. Someone knew that you didn't have good sense, didn't exercise good judgment, ever. You targeted your entire family because you knew our love would protect you from the punishment you deserve.
You are not mentally ill, just demonic, pretending to be ignorant, psychotic. You laugh at my tears. You idiot, I am not crying for me, I'm crying for you!
Judas had sense enough to kill himself after he betrayed Jesus. You have plotted, connived, robbed, raped and plundered your entire life. You ignorantly try to treat GOD like one of your tricks. GOD doesn't care that you spent four or five thousand dollars on a gold cross. GOD doesn't care that you call His name every other breath. GOD demands that you live right.
LIVE RIGHT!!! Love your neighbor as yourself. Love your enemies.
Nothing has changed. "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Jesus threw the money changers and dove sellers out of the church. If people in the church were wicked two thousand years ago when Jesus walked this earth in the flesh, we can only imagine how many demons have infiltrated the church since His ascension.
Preach the WORD in season and out. Tell people the TRUTH! Do not put up with wrong doing. Do not let demons intimidate you.
You have to live right, you have to love the LORD, you have to love your neighbors, and your enemies. That's it, plain and simple. So, why is it so hard?
It's hard because some didn't read the Book, some don't believe what's in the Book. Some people only believe what they see. That's bad for people who have only seen wrong doing.
I know what I know. I know GOD loves me. I know GOD set me apart. I know GOD saved me from a terrible fate. She was on her way. She had me and she had me good and I was going to suffer mightily. That was her plan. She was smart, she was pretty, she was the right color and she was sneaky. But, I believe she made her move too soon. Her sexual exploitation of me began too soon so I didn't become that great low class whore that she expected. Brutalized and called filthy names made we want to be somebody.
"Man" you can do a lot of things, but you can't fool GOD. Don't think because you crept up on eighty-five years of "life" that you got over, that you are going to get away. Your sorry life proves that you lost.
You remind me of the story of King Solomon and his wise decision to cut the disputed baby in half. Of course the woman who was not the real mother did not object to the King's cruel decision.
You laugh at me and ridicule me. You corral your posse against me. My relatives revile me and ostracize me. You laugh and taunt me. You send me foul messages and veiled threats. You continue to laugh. You couldn't care less you announce.
That's where you don't get it. That's where you reveal yourself to the careful listener. No real mother would say the kinds of things you say about their child.
Just so you know, I always knew you hated me. I know, you wanted me to know. You just didn't want prying eyes to know. Not that you felt any guilt, not that you were going to suffer from a tarnished image. You didn't want other people to know simply because you felt that it was none of their business.
Let me say this real plain. I don't like you and I don't like people like you, dumb ignorant sneaky demons that are only successful in making their loved ones miserable.
*Verlean made a special trip to your house on Dwain Drive. She was obviously very upset, *Leo was in the veterans hospital in Durham facing some very serious surgery. *Verlean gave you all the details and left.
I wasn't surprised by the way you talked about her when she left. I was surprised when you said that you were not going to the VA to see *Leo. I was surprised when you told me how much you hated him. I was shocked when you told me that HE had ruined your life.
I begged you, you relented and we drove to the VA in your long Sedan de'Ville Cadillac. I will never forget that day, a one hundred and ninety degree turn around. They were wheeling him into recovery by the time we got there. You started screaming and crying. You put on an academy award performance; "Dat's my son! Dat's my Son!!!"
Neither one of us recognized it, but I learned a lot about you that day. You are nothing but a lying phony. "A man that will lie, will steal. A man that will steal will kill."
There you were putting on a performance, lying and crying over a son that you secretly hate. Who else do you secretly hate? Well your secrets are out. You are nothing but a low life black hearted "root worker" who has never been anything but evil her entire life.
Something is wrong with you and it has been wrong your entire life. Someone knew that you should have never been permitted to be a mother. Someone knew that you didn't have good sense, didn't exercise good judgment, ever. You targeted your entire family because you knew our love would protect you from the punishment you deserve.
You are not mentally ill, just demonic, pretending to be ignorant, psychotic. You laugh at my tears. You idiot, I am not crying for me, I'm crying for you!
Judas had sense enough to kill himself after he betrayed Jesus. You have plotted, connived, robbed, raped and plundered your entire life. You ignorantly try to treat GOD like one of your tricks. GOD doesn't care that you spent four or five thousand dollars on a gold cross. GOD doesn't care that you call His name every other breath. GOD demands that you live right.
LIVE RIGHT!!! Love your neighbor as yourself. Love your enemies.
Nothing has changed. "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Sunday, May 8, 2011
"Happy Godly Mother's Day!"
Victory is mine! I have already won and I have been winning all the time. I know that victory is mine because I read the back of the book (Revelation). Nothing is going to hinder me. No one is going to silence me. I am not ashamed of my life. I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. GOD blessed me to be a special witness to something serious. I have a testimony!
Yes I cried today, But the LORD promised me that He is going to wipe away all tears. I have cried every "Mother's Day" and every day for sixty years. This poor woman thinks that making me cry makes her happy. She thinks pain gives her pleasure and she can't get enough.
The woman that had me is ignorant. That is the simple fact. She is very foolish. She thinks that pretending to live right is just as good as living right. She thinks lying about the truth makes the "lie" the truth. She doesn't believe there is a human being on this earth smart enough to see through her. For some reason she is full of hate. She know that it is wrong that is why she hides it and pretends to be so loving and and giving. The fact is that my "mother" is a demonic con artist., an evil succubus bent on destroying my life, all lives, all "sorry a** niggas always in her face begging her for money."
I don't know why she picked me to hate the most. Maybe I represent what she secretly always wanted to be but never trusted GOD enough to become.
I call myself "one motherless child" because that is exactly what I am. For what ever reason I was the third child born to this "woman". I am the only female.
You must know this, this world must acknowledge this horrendous truth. A sick demon has masqueraded as a loving mother/ daughter long enough. Repentance means to turn away from. She can't turn away from what she relishes, from what she thinks she loves. She is a delusional demon by choice. I went for the mentally ill, I can't help myself, I don't know any better excuses long enough. This woman is a cretin that lives for the sole purpose of inflicting pain.
Foul, loud, clamorous, argumentative, vulgar, vicious and brutal has always been her method of manipulation. Of course it worked. Who wants to get cussed out, pistol whipped, stabbed or shot? And if this creature is your mother, someone who has age and authority over you, what are you going to do?
Just in case you still showed a little spirit, a little fire in your belly, she warned you off with her "voodoo". Ahhhhhhhhh! You have my permission to scream now. This is some information that you must know. You must have an idea of how evil she is in order to fully recognize GOD's mercy.
Relax! GOD has a purpose and a plan. She claims to be old because GOD blessed her. I know GOD allowed her to get old for His purpose.
No mam, no mam. GOD is not going to let you get away with your low life. You sexually abused CHILDREN! You physically, mentally, and emotionally brutalized children! You MURDERED your own father and you think GOD is going to let you in His kingdom?
One of the worst things you did was to target me. I do pray for you. If there is any good in you I hope you find it soon.
Looking back over these sixty years there is something I know; GOD loves me and has always kept His hand upon me. He didn't let you ruin me and you tried over and over.
You wasted your time. "And the LORD shall deliver me from EVERY Evil work." (2 Tim 4:18)
If you have a good mother, a Godly mother, you are truly blessed.
Stay in His WORD children. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Yes I cried today, But the LORD promised me that He is going to wipe away all tears. I have cried every "Mother's Day" and every day for sixty years. This poor woman thinks that making me cry makes her happy. She thinks pain gives her pleasure and she can't get enough.
The woman that had me is ignorant. That is the simple fact. She is very foolish. She thinks that pretending to live right is just as good as living right. She thinks lying about the truth makes the "lie" the truth. She doesn't believe there is a human being on this earth smart enough to see through her. For some reason she is full of hate. She know that it is wrong that is why she hides it and pretends to be so loving and and giving. The fact is that my "mother" is a demonic con artist., an evil succubus bent on destroying my life, all lives, all "sorry a** niggas always in her face begging her for money."
I don't know why she picked me to hate the most. Maybe I represent what she secretly always wanted to be but never trusted GOD enough to become.
I call myself "one motherless child" because that is exactly what I am. For what ever reason I was the third child born to this "woman". I am the only female.
You must know this, this world must acknowledge this horrendous truth. A sick demon has masqueraded as a loving mother/ daughter long enough. Repentance means to turn away from. She can't turn away from what she relishes, from what she thinks she loves. She is a delusional demon by choice. I went for the mentally ill, I can't help myself, I don't know any better excuses long enough. This woman is a cretin that lives for the sole purpose of inflicting pain.
Foul, loud, clamorous, argumentative, vulgar, vicious and brutal has always been her method of manipulation. Of course it worked. Who wants to get cussed out, pistol whipped, stabbed or shot? And if this creature is your mother, someone who has age and authority over you, what are you going to do?
Just in case you still showed a little spirit, a little fire in your belly, she warned you off with her "voodoo". Ahhhhhhhhh! You have my permission to scream now. This is some information that you must know. You must have an idea of how evil she is in order to fully recognize GOD's mercy.
Relax! GOD has a purpose and a plan. She claims to be old because GOD blessed her. I know GOD allowed her to get old for His purpose.
No mam, no mam. GOD is not going to let you get away with your low life. You sexually abused CHILDREN! You physically, mentally, and emotionally brutalized children! You MURDERED your own father and you think GOD is going to let you in His kingdom?
One of the worst things you did was to target me. I do pray for you. If there is any good in you I hope you find it soon.
Looking back over these sixty years there is something I know; GOD loves me and has always kept His hand upon me. He didn't let you ruin me and you tried over and over.
You wasted your time. "And the LORD shall deliver me from EVERY Evil work." (2 Tim 4:18)
If you have a good mother, a Godly mother, you are truly blessed.
Stay in His WORD children. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Friday, May 6, 2011
"Growing up black in America"
I was in high school and my English teacher assigned the book "Black Like Me", some book by some white man that tinted himself black and lived as a black person briefly. His book was a best seller. It took a white man pretending to be black to garner any empathy for the plight of blacks in 1960's "white America".
The horrors of racism and discrimination were revealed in a graphic fashion I assume. I don't know because I refused to read the book. I explained to my white teacher that I lived the "black experience" every day of my life and I didn't need any white man to co-sign my pain.
I remember the segregated waiting rooms, "White Only" water fountains, all of the social taboos. Our local paper ,The Fayetteville Observer was segregated. Puny little "Colored Weddings" always followed the beautiful spread reserved for the white high-brow. Even the obituaries were segregated. Every thing concerning the "colored" was small and inadequate. And too many black people said; " Just be glad dey put your black a** in de paper!"
Needless to say America has come a long way. But, I have a story to tell. While America was emerging and growing, while America was healing and inching toward real civilization, I was quietly living a nightmare. I know now that some governmental agency should have come to our rescue. A brutal savage sadist was pretending to mother us.
Can you believe it? A sick savage sadist "lunatic" was "mothering" us. Cool, clever and collected she went to work every day, paid her bills, attended church every Sunday, said the right things most of the time. Most of the time, not all of the time. Expect "her" to do do something "crazy", something bizarre or something slutty pretty often. Sometimes the police were called. There were some acts that forced you into shock. Mainly you just prayed and kept your silence.
Who was I going to tell? Plus, I wasn't "suicidal" enough to tell. Growing up I saw too much blood spilled just for "upsetting" her. I wasn't about to tell.
Make sure you understand. Make sure you don't believe her. I am not going back in the archives, I am not wallowing in the past, as she so vehemently and eloquently claims. I am warning you concerning your future. She is an evil demonic "rootworker" incapable of love, incapable of goodness. Now, you've been warned. Do what you will.
I tried to love her but she is too dangerous. I know, who is stupid enough to trust a known murderer? But, that's it, that's how good she is. That's how charismatic she is. She is so charming she can make you forget how cruel she is. Great at self promotion, even better at making you believe her piss is rain.
GOD turned Saul into Paul. But Saul did not lie his way to Paul. Poor misguided Mathy Jane always believed that she could and should lie and steal her way through life.
Something happened to her, something very bad. What could make anyone carry so much secret hatred? What could make anyone want to destroy their own children?
Twenty-twenty hindsight reveals the "crazy" woman that I loved and revered as my mother was no more than a sick perverted demon. That's what she was and is and the world needs to know.
There needs to be a study. The world needs to know that these kinds of beings exist. There are women, there are mothers, so manipulative, so selfish they commit horrible perversions against their own children , harm our communities, while maintaining a perfect front.
Accept it! I tell myself. It's a fact. She couldn't love you. Maybe she tried. She couldn't tell you "that" truth. She couldn't tell herself. "Deliver us from evil, for thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory."
If I said that "that" sexual attack on her little eight year old body, eight year old undeveloped brain rendered her helpless, would I be excusing her cruelty? Did her "attack" cause her to go wrong? Is that what her daddy always wondered when she shamed him yet again?
Life has taught me that no one should feel superior to anyone for any reason. No, my pain is not the same as your pain. I believe that I, my entire family, have suffered far more pain than most people. The real kicker is for no reason. My "mother" a blind raging savage perverted lunatic, for no reason! She never gained any thing. She just proved that she is in fact as common as the Wade community always said she was.
There is a fact her that can not be ignored. If she was clever enough to commit such heinous crimes over and over, she is intelligent enough to apologize. She did wrong deliberately.
Listen with your eyes, look at their fruit.
As you prepare for this Mother's Day and you are blessed with a good mother please treat her very special. Make a tremendous sacrifice, honor her. If your mother is deceased visit her resting place. Surprise a little orphan child with a gift. Bless someone else.
Be a blessING and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
The horrors of racism and discrimination were revealed in a graphic fashion I assume. I don't know because I refused to read the book. I explained to my white teacher that I lived the "black experience" every day of my life and I didn't need any white man to co-sign my pain.
I remember the segregated waiting rooms, "White Only" water fountains, all of the social taboos. Our local paper ,The Fayetteville Observer was segregated. Puny little "Colored Weddings" always followed the beautiful spread reserved for the white high-brow. Even the obituaries were segregated. Every thing concerning the "colored" was small and inadequate. And too many black people said; " Just be glad dey put your black a** in de paper!"
Needless to say America has come a long way. But, I have a story to tell. While America was emerging and growing, while America was healing and inching toward real civilization, I was quietly living a nightmare. I know now that some governmental agency should have come to our rescue. A brutal savage sadist was pretending to mother us.
Can you believe it? A sick savage sadist "lunatic" was "mothering" us. Cool, clever and collected she went to work every day, paid her bills, attended church every Sunday, said the right things most of the time. Most of the time, not all of the time. Expect "her" to do do something "crazy", something bizarre or something slutty pretty often. Sometimes the police were called. There were some acts that forced you into shock. Mainly you just prayed and kept your silence.
Who was I going to tell? Plus, I wasn't "suicidal" enough to tell. Growing up I saw too much blood spilled just for "upsetting" her. I wasn't about to tell.
Make sure you understand. Make sure you don't believe her. I am not going back in the archives, I am not wallowing in the past, as she so vehemently and eloquently claims. I am warning you concerning your future. She is an evil demonic "rootworker" incapable of love, incapable of goodness. Now, you've been warned. Do what you will.
I tried to love her but she is too dangerous. I know, who is stupid enough to trust a known murderer? But, that's it, that's how good she is. That's how charismatic she is. She is so charming she can make you forget how cruel she is. Great at self promotion, even better at making you believe her piss is rain.
GOD turned Saul into Paul. But Saul did not lie his way to Paul. Poor misguided Mathy Jane always believed that she could and should lie and steal her way through life.
Something happened to her, something very bad. What could make anyone carry so much secret hatred? What could make anyone want to destroy their own children?
Twenty-twenty hindsight reveals the "crazy" woman that I loved and revered as my mother was no more than a sick perverted demon. That's what she was and is and the world needs to know.
There needs to be a study. The world needs to know that these kinds of beings exist. There are women, there are mothers, so manipulative, so selfish they commit horrible perversions against their own children , harm our communities, while maintaining a perfect front.
Accept it! I tell myself. It's a fact. She couldn't love you. Maybe she tried. She couldn't tell you "that" truth. She couldn't tell herself. "Deliver us from evil, for thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory."
If I said that "that" sexual attack on her little eight year old body, eight year old undeveloped brain rendered her helpless, would I be excusing her cruelty? Did her "attack" cause her to go wrong? Is that what her daddy always wondered when she shamed him yet again?
Life has taught me that no one should feel superior to anyone for any reason. No, my pain is not the same as your pain. I believe that I, my entire family, have suffered far more pain than most people. The real kicker is for no reason. My "mother" a blind raging savage perverted lunatic, for no reason! She never gained any thing. She just proved that she is in fact as common as the Wade community always said she was.
There is a fact her that can not be ignored. If she was clever enough to commit such heinous crimes over and over, she is intelligent enough to apologize. She did wrong deliberately.
Listen with your eyes, look at their fruit.
As you prepare for this Mother's Day and you are blessed with a good mother please treat her very special. Make a tremendous sacrifice, honor her. If your mother is deceased visit her resting place. Surprise a little orphan child with a gift. Bless someone else.
Be a blessING and be blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can." Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Thursday, May 5, 2011
How blind can you be?
How blind can you be? How blind can we be? I was blind and could not see. You held me captive in those woods between the highway and granddaddy's house. I was three years old and you cursed me like I was thirty. You cussed me until I went blind. I was screaming to the top of my lungs. You could not hear me because I learned to scream silently. I learned to cry dry tears because I didn't have any wet ones left.
You were just as demonic then as you are now. The thought of you makes my flesh crawl. All those sick things you did to me, did to us. Why did we keep your secrets? Was it fear? Or were we just blind? Blinded by your charisma, your gift of gab, your brilliant "logic", your crushing pronouncements over our lives?
I developed into a very stoic "hard little nut to crack" because I didn't want to hear your famous; "The more you cry the less you piss!". I didn't want to hear your diabolical hideous laugh.
Why did you "drop a cussing" on me away from my grandfather's eyes and ears? Because you knew better! You are not nearly as crazy as you make out. All of your evil has been done out of ear shot, out of sight.
What does that mean? That means you are a demon that loves being a demon, is glad that she decided long ago to become a demon.
I was looking at you. I saw you and I studied you but I didn't know what I was looking at.
You are a demon Mathy Jane caught up in a perennial search for something and someone to hate. At every stage of my life I have been your target. I let you get away with it over and over because I didn't know what I was fighting. I foolishly believed that forgiving you would help you and you would ultimately change.
You have taunted and tortured me over and over for my entire life. I know you can't stop. You are powerless against the whims of Satan.
I guess I didn't see the demon in you because I didn't know to look for him. Like most people I had some preconceived notion about a man in a red cape carrying a pitch fork. I had no idea that Satan could possess my beautiful mother. Your evil is an inconvenient truth that I refused to accept for fifty-eight years!
There you were standing over my new born trying to deafen her. Your eyes were blazing red, but I didn't know what I was looking at. I managed to scream; "Mother! What are you doing!?" "I wuz jest trying to see if she can hear?" What a whacked lie! Did I believe you? Or was I just afraid of you? Was I afraid to know the truth?
I sat there watching you gyrate your pelvis in the young man's face. Time stood still, every eye in the day-room was on you. It was the young men that felt embarrassed and moved your orgy into another room. The four young men cared more about my feelings than you did. I heard a quiet chorus hoarsely whisper; "That's her mother!" I pretended not to care. Again I was stoic. I sat there frozen afraid to think while you were in that room with four robust young men doing only GOD knows what. Four young men, twenty years your junior cared more about me, more about my feelings than you did. I am sorry, but I was blind. I was blind and refused to see.
Don't you dare try to defend yourself. You are caught. You are busted. All these years you have suffered under the delusion that you are winning, that you are getting away. That you are the smartest, the most successful demon that ever lived.
"Shame on you." That's what granddaddy told you. I concur; "Shame on you."
You blew it, you messed up bad. Nothing has changed. Apart from Christ you are STILL nothing.
"Go out the world backwards like you did when you first came here." Play ignorant, pretend to be stupid, put on a another "coon" act, make sure you continue in your wrong doing. There is no point in your changing now. I promise to spit every time I hear your name.
To GOD be the Glory. I know that GOD has a purpose and a plan for every life. I admonish you children; study your Bible. Learn GOD's WORD! Put on the whole armour of GOD and never shrimp in the face of Satan. If you see a demon call them out! Snatch their clerical regalia off.
Be a blessING and be blessed.
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
You were just as demonic then as you are now. The thought of you makes my flesh crawl. All those sick things you did to me, did to us. Why did we keep your secrets? Was it fear? Or were we just blind? Blinded by your charisma, your gift of gab, your brilliant "logic", your crushing pronouncements over our lives?
I developed into a very stoic "hard little nut to crack" because I didn't want to hear your famous; "The more you cry the less you piss!". I didn't want to hear your diabolical hideous laugh.
Why did you "drop a cussing" on me away from my grandfather's eyes and ears? Because you knew better! You are not nearly as crazy as you make out. All of your evil has been done out of ear shot, out of sight.
What does that mean? That means you are a demon that loves being a demon, is glad that she decided long ago to become a demon.
I was looking at you. I saw you and I studied you but I didn't know what I was looking at.
You are a demon Mathy Jane caught up in a perennial search for something and someone to hate. At every stage of my life I have been your target. I let you get away with it over and over because I didn't know what I was fighting. I foolishly believed that forgiving you would help you and you would ultimately change.
You have taunted and tortured me over and over for my entire life. I know you can't stop. You are powerless against the whims of Satan.
I guess I didn't see the demon in you because I didn't know to look for him. Like most people I had some preconceived notion about a man in a red cape carrying a pitch fork. I had no idea that Satan could possess my beautiful mother. Your evil is an inconvenient truth that I refused to accept for fifty-eight years!
There you were standing over my new born trying to deafen her. Your eyes were blazing red, but I didn't know what I was looking at. I managed to scream; "Mother! What are you doing!?" "I wuz jest trying to see if she can hear?" What a whacked lie! Did I believe you? Or was I just afraid of you? Was I afraid to know the truth?
I sat there watching you gyrate your pelvis in the young man's face. Time stood still, every eye in the day-room was on you. It was the young men that felt embarrassed and moved your orgy into another room. The four young men cared more about my feelings than you did. I heard a quiet chorus hoarsely whisper; "That's her mother!" I pretended not to care. Again I was stoic. I sat there frozen afraid to think while you were in that room with four robust young men doing only GOD knows what. Four young men, twenty years your junior cared more about me, more about my feelings than you did. I am sorry, but I was blind. I was blind and refused to see.
Don't you dare try to defend yourself. You are caught. You are busted. All these years you have suffered under the delusion that you are winning, that you are getting away. That you are the smartest, the most successful demon that ever lived.
"Shame on you." That's what granddaddy told you. I concur; "Shame on you."
You blew it, you messed up bad. Nothing has changed. Apart from Christ you are STILL nothing.
"Go out the world backwards like you did when you first came here." Play ignorant, pretend to be stupid, put on a another "coon" act, make sure you continue in your wrong doing. There is no point in your changing now. I promise to spit every time I hear your name.
To GOD be the Glory. I know that GOD has a purpose and a plan for every life. I admonish you children; study your Bible. Learn GOD's WORD! Put on the whole armour of GOD and never shrimp in the face of Satan. If you see a demon call them out! Snatch their clerical regalia off.
Be a blessING and be blessed.
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
"Unreachable and Unteachable"
Woman! learn to listen to the voice of reason. The voice of truth, the voice of GOD. Don't continue to shut out the wisdom of GOD. Before you ever did anything wrong you always knew better. You are a person that would rather do wrong and pretend to do right. You feign "holiness and sanctification" while relishing evil and debauchery. "Be ye Hot or Cold!" You know that you are a low vile creature crawling on your belly. Sadly, you are convinced that this is the life you want, that this is the best that you can do. Who wants to do things so sickening and repulsive that they can't own them?
Recognize how you got here. Be honest with yourself for once in your life. The fact is that you are unreachable and unteachable. You know right from wrong but you prefer wrong. Own that! Acknowledge that! Your habitual lying and proclivity for perversion have kept you in bondage for over eighty-five long painful years.
You're right, it can't happen, it is too late for you. But, it is not too late for some poor misguided young person. "Ladies" your vagina is not an ATM machine. Every woman has what you have. You may be sitting on a gold mine, but so is every woman! I don't know how that concept has escaped your understanding all of these years. You can't "sex" someone into doing your bidding. While you are scheming on some man's check you could be living your dream.
There is something you neglect to tell your granddaughters when you brag about your conquests. "I ain't nevah had no man dat didn't give me no money! Any man that ain't got sense enough to pay my bills I don't want him!"
That's cool if that is the best you can do. But if GOD gave you half a brain you can earn your own living. Rid yourself of that parasitic nature. Do for self. Pay your own bills. True, you can use your beauty or booty, your feminine wiles to lure and exploit a man. But what do you have in the end?
You said that you married *Carson because of us, your little black bastard "young'uns". You married a man that you didn't want. A man you felt better than. A man that you claimed you hated because he was short and jet black.
Well you could have been independent. You could have finished college. You could have listened to your father.
Well, you ran out and did every thing that you were big enough to do. You selfishly brought shame on your family name and you didn't care. Your parents loved you anyway, welcomed baby after baby after baby.
My grandfather feed and took care of your bastard babies. He never said a mumbling word.
You didn't have to hate us. Hating us is your deliberate ignorant reprobate choice. Don't be angry with me because I finally found the courage to speak the truth.
Check it out, suppressing the truth by "any means necessary" has always been your method. It never changed the truth. I am a witness! You are despicable and you are going to rot in hell! Hate me all you want! Hate GOD! You are still you, unfit at all ages, all stages of your life.
I am bowled over, astonished, stung! You, a beautiful talented woman spent your entire life chasing down the dreams and whims of others. Any hint of enlightenment and ultimate escape by anyone you knew fired you up. Envy and jealousy have always motivated you to act, to shoot daggers from your eyes, to snatch, to steal to sabotage. Ruin and destroy is your first nature, not your second.
What about you? What about your dreams? Didn't you ever want to do anything? How did you let your secret hate over rule your desire to be successful in something? There are no short cuts to "success". Yes, you can cheat your way or buy a degree. People can call you "doctor" but you don't have the knowledge.
The fact that you murdered your own father is as plain as the nose on your face. I am so glad my blind cousin called you out.
You are sick, I am sorry that I can't help you. You poor woman caught in a cycle of sick savage sabotage, lying, scheming and denying.
I thank GOD every day for His revelation. I thank Him for blessing me. Praise the Living LORD!!! I would not be you for Oprah's money.
Again I thank you for Jerome Walters. I thank you for making me go to church. I thank you for the scars. I thank you for the purging.
Stay in His WORD children. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Recognize how you got here. Be honest with yourself for once in your life. The fact is that you are unreachable and unteachable. You know right from wrong but you prefer wrong. Own that! Acknowledge that! Your habitual lying and proclivity for perversion have kept you in bondage for over eighty-five long painful years.
You're right, it can't happen, it is too late for you. But, it is not too late for some poor misguided young person. "Ladies" your vagina is not an ATM machine. Every woman has what you have. You may be sitting on a gold mine, but so is every woman! I don't know how that concept has escaped your understanding all of these years. You can't "sex" someone into doing your bidding. While you are scheming on some man's check you could be living your dream.
There is something you neglect to tell your granddaughters when you brag about your conquests. "I ain't nevah had no man dat didn't give me no money! Any man that ain't got sense enough to pay my bills I don't want him!"
That's cool if that is the best you can do. But if GOD gave you half a brain you can earn your own living. Rid yourself of that parasitic nature. Do for self. Pay your own bills. True, you can use your beauty or booty, your feminine wiles to lure and exploit a man. But what do you have in the end?
You said that you married *Carson because of us, your little black bastard "young'uns". You married a man that you didn't want. A man you felt better than. A man that you claimed you hated because he was short and jet black.
Well you could have been independent. You could have finished college. You could have listened to your father.
Well, you ran out and did every thing that you were big enough to do. You selfishly brought shame on your family name and you didn't care. Your parents loved you anyway, welcomed baby after baby after baby.
My grandfather feed and took care of your bastard babies. He never said a mumbling word.
You didn't have to hate us. Hating us is your deliberate ignorant reprobate choice. Don't be angry with me because I finally found the courage to speak the truth.
Check it out, suppressing the truth by "any means necessary" has always been your method. It never changed the truth. I am a witness! You are despicable and you are going to rot in hell! Hate me all you want! Hate GOD! You are still you, unfit at all ages, all stages of your life.
I am bowled over, astonished, stung! You, a beautiful talented woman spent your entire life chasing down the dreams and whims of others. Any hint of enlightenment and ultimate escape by anyone you knew fired you up. Envy and jealousy have always motivated you to act, to shoot daggers from your eyes, to snatch, to steal to sabotage. Ruin and destroy is your first nature, not your second.
What about you? What about your dreams? Didn't you ever want to do anything? How did you let your secret hate over rule your desire to be successful in something? There are no short cuts to "success". Yes, you can cheat your way or buy a degree. People can call you "doctor" but you don't have the knowledge.
The fact that you murdered your own father is as plain as the nose on your face. I am so glad my blind cousin called you out.
You are sick, I am sorry that I can't help you. You poor woman caught in a cycle of sick savage sabotage, lying, scheming and denying.
I thank GOD every day for His revelation. I thank Him for blessing me. Praise the Living LORD!!! I would not be you for Oprah's money.
Again I thank you for Jerome Walters. I thank you for making me go to church. I thank you for the scars. I thank you for the purging.
Stay in His WORD children. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Monday, May 2, 2011
"You've got to walk that lonesome valley"
"You've got to walk that lonesome valley" is a mournful verse from a very haunting country and western song. "No body else can walk it for you. You've got to walk it for yourself." All inhabitants of this earth are on a path, albeit a distinctly different journey for each. I do believe GOD has a unique purpose for each life. He told us that He has some vessels for honor, some for dishonor. Every person on this earth has a GOD given destiny. Some people will enjoy fantastic "blessed" lives, some will endure horrors.
I do believe that all people seek love and happiness. Many don't find it. Many lose their way, make bad decisions. Life is hard, some times it is harder than it should be if you are unduly influenced and led astray. Some of us fall in with bad company, the wrong crowd. How many people get forced into the worse possible existence by their own families? By their own mothers? Rarely do we have reason to distrust our mothers. We think of Moms as being harsh sometime, but mother is always right. Most mothers will do anything to protect and promote their children. The worst commonest whore of a woman is usually a good mother, we hope. The words good and mother are synonymous. Mothers and motherhood are revered around the world.
So, why would any woman dedicate her entire life to stealth demonology? Why does she want everyone in the world to lose? Why does she celebrate and relish heartbreak? Why does she deliberately entice you to do the wrong thing? Is she still smarting over her bad decisions? Should her children mess up because she messed up? What kind of mind would use her age and position to lure her children and all that trust her down the wrong path?
Once we discover who we are or where we are many of us think that we can help make our world a better place, be good productive citizens while we pursue the American dream. That's why we become teachers, nurses, social workers, firemen, policemen. I do think that most people are good. But there are some people that are very , very bad. They are so bad that it is hard to convince people of your reality.
That is part of my plight. My supreme torturer has gotten away with her "Dr. Jekyll Mr. Hyde" personality for so long that some people think it no longer matters. Some think that she is no longer dangerous. Some are just so conditioned to her abuse that they quit fighting decades ago.
My reality is unbelievable. Sixty years of life stolen, misused and abused. Devastated by grief and guilt, full of hatred and frustration I demand an end to my misery.
I don't want to know why. What is the point? I can't undo it. I can sound the alarm. I can warn people. She is a torn in my flesh, but she is the best testimony, the greatest evidence of GOD's goodness and love.
Why would any one seek the destruction of some one born on the bottom? Any person that would entertain mistreating a small child is not wrapped too tight. That person has to have very low self esteem. A person that enjoys torturing others is a very disturbed person and I hope you never discover that type of pain. That person is not a demon, she is a legion of demons, the the spirit of the anti-Christ. That is not a spirit that can be ignored or simply prayed for. That is an evil spirit that must be exposed for the safety of others. People need to be warned that these kinds of imps have infiltrated our churches and our homes.
Permitting them to live and to thrive is not Christian, it is cowardly. I will not live my life as a sniveling coward, as a "black", as a "female", as an "old spinster", as any pejorative the world can manufacture.
"I Was Born For GREATNESS!
If I am to BE,
What I want to Be,
It Is Up To ME!!!"
No demon racist will hold me back. No spirit of the anti-Christ will determine any facet of my life.
"Come ye out from among them" ; the Bible tells us. " I will drink muddy water. I will sleep in a hollow log." is my bluesy declaration.
"Now we command you, brethren, in the name of our LORD Jesus Christ, that ye withdraw yourselves from every brother that walketh disorderly, and not after the tradition which he received of us."
"And if any man obey not our word by this epistle, note that man (woman), and have NO company with him, that he may be ashamed." 2 Thessalonians 3:6,14
I am too old to play games. I am not going to pretend that some old sour succubus is a good "Christian", saved and sanctified, sold out for Christ because that is the role this old manipulative creep has created for me to play.
She will play this sick game until the day she dies. Her "fun" is not my fun. She is miserable and she thinks she loves it. The truth is that she doesn't have the courage to live right. She is not brave enough to declare her undying love for the LORD. Poor Martha is in love with the world. She would rather please the world, please her fellow man. Her pride will not let her recognize her wrong, her many mistakes. So, she compounds her mistakes by more ignorant combative behavior. Fighting mad that she can no longer fool you, she ridicules you, spreads lies on you. Curses and cusses you more for knowing the truth. Not one bit of remorse for anything she ever did. From baby rape to murder. Her motto; "If you didn't see me, if you didn't catch me in the act, I didn't do it. That's my story and I am sticking to it." Has it every occurred to her that it is her rotten unrepentant life that makes her feel so lousy?
It has never occurred to Mathy Jane to change for real. How can she think pretending to change is the best solution. No, it is not that she could not change. She has never wanted to change. Living a good life has never held any interest with her. Living right, loving GOD, obeying GOD's WORD has always been too boring for her. She never listened to her father, he was just some old fogey to her. It never occurred to her that one day all of her manipulation and cruelty would no longer matter. The fact that one day her "roots" would no longer work, never crossed her mind.
Just make sure it doesn't happen to you. Never mess with graveyard dust or the occult. Do not fall into the habit of lying. Do not envy. If you find that you can't love, pray.
Pray for one another. "Love one another as I have loved you." Fall in love with the TRUTH! Speak it!
Stay in His WORD children. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
I do believe that all people seek love and happiness. Many don't find it. Many lose their way, make bad decisions. Life is hard, some times it is harder than it should be if you are unduly influenced and led astray. Some of us fall in with bad company, the wrong crowd. How many people get forced into the worse possible existence by their own families? By their own mothers? Rarely do we have reason to distrust our mothers. We think of Moms as being harsh sometime, but mother is always right. Most mothers will do anything to protect and promote their children. The worst commonest whore of a woman is usually a good mother, we hope. The words good and mother are synonymous. Mothers and motherhood are revered around the world.
So, why would any woman dedicate her entire life to stealth demonology? Why does she want everyone in the world to lose? Why does she celebrate and relish heartbreak? Why does she deliberately entice you to do the wrong thing? Is she still smarting over her bad decisions? Should her children mess up because she messed up? What kind of mind would use her age and position to lure her children and all that trust her down the wrong path?
Once we discover who we are or where we are many of us think that we can help make our world a better place, be good productive citizens while we pursue the American dream. That's why we become teachers, nurses, social workers, firemen, policemen. I do think that most people are good. But there are some people that are very , very bad. They are so bad that it is hard to convince people of your reality.
That is part of my plight. My supreme torturer has gotten away with her "Dr. Jekyll Mr. Hyde" personality for so long that some people think it no longer matters. Some think that she is no longer dangerous. Some are just so conditioned to her abuse that they quit fighting decades ago.
My reality is unbelievable. Sixty years of life stolen, misused and abused. Devastated by grief and guilt, full of hatred and frustration I demand an end to my misery.
I don't want to know why. What is the point? I can't undo it. I can sound the alarm. I can warn people. She is a torn in my flesh, but she is the best testimony, the greatest evidence of GOD's goodness and love.
Why would any one seek the destruction of some one born on the bottom? Any person that would entertain mistreating a small child is not wrapped too tight. That person has to have very low self esteem. A person that enjoys torturing others is a very disturbed person and I hope you never discover that type of pain. That person is not a demon, she is a legion of demons, the the spirit of the anti-Christ. That is not a spirit that can be ignored or simply prayed for. That is an evil spirit that must be exposed for the safety of others. People need to be warned that these kinds of imps have infiltrated our churches and our homes.
Permitting them to live and to thrive is not Christian, it is cowardly. I will not live my life as a sniveling coward, as a "black", as a "female", as an "old spinster", as any pejorative the world can manufacture.
"I Was Born For GREATNESS!
If I am to BE,
What I want to Be,
It Is Up To ME!!!"
No demon racist will hold me back. No spirit of the anti-Christ will determine any facet of my life.
"Come ye out from among them" ; the Bible tells us. " I will drink muddy water. I will sleep in a hollow log." is my bluesy declaration.
"Now we command you, brethren, in the name of our LORD Jesus Christ, that ye withdraw yourselves from every brother that walketh disorderly, and not after the tradition which he received of us."
"And if any man obey not our word by this epistle, note that man (woman), and have NO company with him, that he may be ashamed." 2 Thessalonians 3:6,14
I am too old to play games. I am not going to pretend that some old sour succubus is a good "Christian", saved and sanctified, sold out for Christ because that is the role this old manipulative creep has created for me to play.
She will play this sick game until the day she dies. Her "fun" is not my fun. She is miserable and she thinks she loves it. The truth is that she doesn't have the courage to live right. She is not brave enough to declare her undying love for the LORD. Poor Martha is in love with the world. She would rather please the world, please her fellow man. Her pride will not let her recognize her wrong, her many mistakes. So, she compounds her mistakes by more ignorant combative behavior. Fighting mad that she can no longer fool you, she ridicules you, spreads lies on you. Curses and cusses you more for knowing the truth. Not one bit of remorse for anything she ever did. From baby rape to murder. Her motto; "If you didn't see me, if you didn't catch me in the act, I didn't do it. That's my story and I am sticking to it." Has it every occurred to her that it is her rotten unrepentant life that makes her feel so lousy?
It has never occurred to Mathy Jane to change for real. How can she think pretending to change is the best solution. No, it is not that she could not change. She has never wanted to change. Living a good life has never held any interest with her. Living right, loving GOD, obeying GOD's WORD has always been too boring for her. She never listened to her father, he was just some old fogey to her. It never occurred to her that one day all of her manipulation and cruelty would no longer matter. The fact that one day her "roots" would no longer work, never crossed her mind.
Just make sure it doesn't happen to you. Never mess with graveyard dust or the occult. Do not fall into the habit of lying. Do not envy. If you find that you can't love, pray.
Pray for one another. "Love one another as I have loved you." Fall in love with the TRUTH! Speak it!
Stay in His WORD children. Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
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