"'Tis the season ...

to be merry."  The whole world prepares for Christmas.  All perfect, all normal, all cut out of the same cookie cutter of perfection.  Singing Christmas carols, wrapping gifts, not a worry in the world.  We do take a moment to think of the less fortunate, buying toys for tots or dropping  some dollar bills in the black kettle.

If you are not perfect you better pretend to be.  You can't hurt, you better smile, even grin. You will invite people into your home that you don't like or trust.  You are too polite or too afraid to shun them.  No one else says anything, so you won't either.

If you hurt you are accused of being a crybaby,  "unforgiving".  You keep bringing up "old s***".  You can't stop thinking.  You can't stop remembering.  You're seething with anger and disappointment.  You want to enjoy Christmas.  You want desperately to be "normal" like everyone else.

Unfortunately "normal" escaped you.  You don't know what "normal" is.  You observe, you mimic, but you know that something is missing.  You can't stop remembering all of the "bad Christmases".

You know what the Bible says.  "You will reap what you sow."

You wrap gifts and decorate your house but you can't squash the image of that demon.  You fought this truth your whole life although she always made it crystal clear.  Blind Ray Charles could see from the grave she is a demon! She never half stepped in her cruelty.  Always complete butchery.  She went straight for the jugular with a quickness.  Tied my 12 year old brother up like a hog.  Stripped him completely naked and beat him bloody.  Beat him across his privates.  Left him to die.  Had the nerve to come back hours later to console him, to kiss him and to remind him how it was all his fault and how we "bed not tell nobody!".

What is she "preaching" for?  Does she like the sound of "Reverend"?  Who believes her?  Who still fears her? Why?

Prepare for Christmas.  Get ready for that great day.  Give more than you receive.  Give yourself GOD's Gospel Truth.

Merry Christmas to all!