Prolonged Unnecessary Pain

I am suffering from a prolonged unnecessary heartache. What did I do to deserve such a life? I made the mistake of not aborting myself. Had I known my fate I surely would have killed myself in her corrupt womb. At any rate I am here and have been on this earth for quite some time paying for my crime of craving life. I am more than mad or angry. I am well beyond grief stricken. I am a mere pile of dust ground down to nothing by my MOTHER. Today is her eighty-fifth birthday and she is more of a monster today than she ever was when she brutalized and raped me as a child. I scream WHY? over and over. There is no answer, there is no solution. Distance is about the best I am ever going to get from her. She knows I hate her guts. But this wacko loves being hated. Being hated rationalizes and justifies her deep hatred for every good and kind person that she persecutes. Fear is what she still uses very skillfully to tether her prey. If you love her, talk to her or interact with her in any way you are exactly that, her prey. What can a person be to a Predator other than prey? Is she happy? God only knows. I know that she can not be as ignorant as she pretends to be. Do not under estimate her potential to lay you low just because she is ancient. That creature has many plots hatching in her brain right now. If you love her you will be victimized over and over. She hates herself, therefore she must hate and destroy you for being dumb and gullible enough to love her. I pray every day. I know the God I serve will not fail me though he tarry. I often wonder; how does this Thing look in the mirror? There is not one word of truth in her. She is proud that she murdered her own father and got away clean. At least "clean" in her mind. Her savage primitive debauchery paid off. Who has the courage to call her out? Who will tell her about herself? I do regret the fact that I hate her with an absolute passion. I pray daily for God to remove this black hatred from my heart. Yes I want her to be found out, exposed. What is a fitting punishment? Should she die in the street and be devoured by dogs like Jezebel? No. I just want her to recognize the fact that her life is punishment enough. Living and knowing full well her real character is surely excruciatingly painful to her. A total fake, from her Fashion Fair make-up, double decker wigs, "anointing", marriage, sexuality, and pretense of being a loving caring mother. Better than anyone she knows her true character, her real legacy.
How can she stand herself knowing that she sexually abused underage children. I could not know as a child that I was witnessing a sick twisted demon. Our baby sitter J***** F***, my boyfriend, G***** S**** and countless unnamed victims. She was a grown woman sexually abusing teenagers (male and female) in our community! A prostitute, laying up under that fat ugly crow black walrus looking nigger, Mr. Lizzard. Forcing me to clean up her nasty cum rags and empty Emko bottles when I was eleven years old. I often thought that being orphaned as a child was the worse thing that could happen to a person. I was wrong. The worse thing that can happen to anyone is to be born to a succubus. You see a succubus will not leave you alone. They stalk you, dig pits, tell lies, attempt to work roots on you ,while secretly relishing in your pain. Pain gets her off. A woman with a high male sexual libido she can not be satisfied. MJW's life is unbelievable. It is too hard to bear. My relatives ignore me, pretend to be in disbelief. No one is capable of such evil is their erroneous rationale. Wrong. She is capable and she is still laughing. The world's greatest con artist she is delighted by the fact that so many revere her and call on her to pray and preach. Well I am here to tell you MJW that your time is up. It is finished. God gave you time and he gave you many opportunities to change and repent. You refuse, YOU KNOW THE TRUTH. You have always known the truth. You were a rebellious incorrigible adolescent and refused to heed your father's constant admonishments. Instead of hearing you hated him, hated God and continued on your path until you finally got up enough nerve to shoot him in the heart. Your only regret was that you had not done it sooner. Well, all I have to say is that it was totally unnecessary. You didn't change anything. You are still the common miscreant that brought nothing but shame and degradation to your family. Your Lies are still Lies. You are still COMMON! Your color can not protect you, your phony preaching can't save you and your sniveling cowardly minions that serve you and pretend to love you will forsake you.
It is called "free will" and you made your choice. Jesus said that you would wax worse and worse and you have. Perhaps your stiff necked unrepentant life can serve as an example of how not to live. Maybe someone will realize that "freaking" can lead to horrible consequences. Maybe some good people will read my blog and be moved to enact laws to prevent people like you from terrorizing for so long. Perhaps someone will now be able to identify the demons that plague them for no reason. Maybe you will finally take responsibility for your own actions and repent.
How long? Not long.
Be blessed children. Continue to read and study His Word.
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel