You will be hated...

ostracized, talked about, lied on, persecuted by All men for loving your LORD Jesus Christ.  Don't you ever forget how Christ was hated and crucified on this earth.

Man has not changed.  Men are just as stupid, lying and easily led astray as they were over two thousand years ago.  Jesus told us they would infiltrate the church, lead silly captives astray.

Have you been led astray?  Do you think attending church "religiously" is enough?  Do you think hollering "LORD! LORD!" is enough?  Why do you wear that crucifix?  Is it simply a "good luck charm" to you?  Do you wear it to appear to be saved?

Are you living right?  Do you love your fellow man?  Can you hear GOD's voice?  Who told you to appease the devil? to live double minded? to straddle the fence?  to lay your "religion down" every time you encountered a problem you thought GOD was too slow to fix?

Are you walking by sight or faith?  Are you living the life GOD wants you to live or are you living the life that you want to live?  Do you justify your sin by declaring that GOD knows your heart?  Do you know your heart?  Are you envious and jealous? Lying and deceitful?  Are you looking for a shortcut to Glory?  Did some greedy "preacher" convince you that your "tithing" will protect you from all harm?

Are you ashamed of the Gospel of Jesus Christ?  You were born into a sinful world.  You inherited sin from your parents, from your "friends", this world.  Do you think salvation, living right, is too hard a cross to bear?

Is GOD's Almighty TRUTH too hard to bear?  Which "road" are you on?  "Wide is the road that leads to death and destruction.  Narrow is the path of righteousness."

If you are afraid to be hated why don't you know that you are going to be hated no matter what.  The devil doesn't have to tell you that she hates you, pre-hated you for you to know that there is nothing you can do.

Why do you shrink? hide your gifts and talents?  Why do you let her reduce you to dust and laugh?  Why do you go crawling to her for a place to live? to pay your gas or electric bill?  You know she has scandalized your name in hopes of elevating herself above you.

You know she has never had a "maternal" instinct.  Never loved a single soul on this earth.  Yes, she wants to possess you, to own you.  Just to abuse you like every toy and trophy she ever had.

Do you remember the three hundred dollar suits she bought in the sixties?  She would buy three, four hundred dollars suits, five at the time from The Capital, and Fleishman's Big Store just so she could throw them down on her bedroom floor and walk on them.  I know because I was her quarry slave that was all too glad to hang them up, to admire them.

I had no clothes, no shoes.  I knew better than to complain.  I made do with the meager possessions she allowed me to have.  I washed that dingy yellow faded cotton blouse out in the sink every night.  You weren't going to use HER washing machine, wasting HER water, HER electricity.  And you damn sure "bed' NOT complain!"  She was perfect.  She was MATHY JANE!

Any adult can frighten, terrorize and intimidate a child.  Any mother can lure her children into captivity and enslave them.  It doesn't take a lot of intelligence.  Just a lot of vulgarity, loud cussing and cursing. It does require a lot of hatred, abominable ignorance.

Too many people still confuse cruelty with courage, mistake GOD's "time" with man's.  "You might get by.  You might get by for a long time.  But, you will not get away."  You will not get away from the Hand of GOD, from His retribution.  You should have known better.  You did.  You knew full well what you were doing.  That's why you crafted every deceit and deed so carefully.

I always wondered why you hated Rev. McIver so much?  She saw through you and told you about yourself.  She was not afraid of you, not one day.  Neither was your daddy.  He told you every day.  You got tired of hearing the truth about yourself.  You did away with his body.  Jesus told us not to fear you.  He told us not to fear anyone or anything that can kill the body but not the soul, the spirit.  Jerome Walter's spirit has never left me.  His admonishments and wisdom is crystal clear in my head.

So, you thought you were going to go out looked up to, the "mother" of the church.  You thought you would be admired and held in high esteem.

Did you ever consider the true and living GOD in your schemes?  Did you really think some "graveyard dirt" was all you needed? Did you really think that you were going to get clean away? That your old age was truly a blessing from GOD?  Do you still think all of your children are your blind, deaf slaves?

Certainly you hurt and injured me.  You blocked my way, destroyed all my writing, my prose, my poetry, my master's thesis.  I hope you finally noticed that you did not stop me from becoming a published author.  You are a brilliant writer.  Destined to be one from your father, grandmother and great grandmother.

You just couldn't trust GOD.  I forgive you.  Why so many evil tricks?  Why so many lies?  Why jealousy and envy over the same gifts and talents that GOD gave you?

Why can't you bend your stiff neck?  Why don't you confess?  Give your children an opportunity to go into the Kingdom!  You don't have to go.  Don't continue to prevent others, to block their way.  You know better.  Do right for once in your life.

This is my therapy, my healing.  "Better out than in." ; was always my grandfather's advice.  You deliberately saddled me with too much pain.  Demanded that I take it to my grave.  "Even water boils when it gets hot."  "The straw that broke the camel's back."

You went too far when you MURDERED my granddaddy.  You caused me too much pain.  I grew accustomed to your lying on me.  But, when you started lying on MY DAUGHTER!  When you started cultivating lying shame for her.  That was enough.  I saw the jealous hatred in your eyes when she graduated from Boston University.  I saw you cringe when she walked across that stage.

I remember how you reacted when your first cousin, your dear sister-cousin earned her master's degree.  I knew.  You left no doubt.

Go in peace Martha.  Trouble no more.  In the mighty name of Jesus I pray.