"Harden not your heart"

Jesus told us not to.  He told us to "Love ye one another as I have loved you".  James told us to; "Count it all joy".

So why are you rigid, frozen in hatred an unbelief, with Jesus on your lips and far from your heart.  Why do you still believe cruelty is courage?

Why are you pretending to be happy? Flaunting all your "worldly stuff" making out like you have it made?
"The LORD giveth and the LORD taketh away."

You cling to a demon possessed woman.  Why? Is it out of habit?  Were you conditioned to go along with evil simply for self preservation? Or are you just afraid of this GOD awful Truth?

It is terrifying!  You find yourself in love with an abomination, a cruel temptress, a homemade prophetess.  It is mind boggling but, every word is true.

I watched her from birth with the eyes of a child.  I watched in shock, locked those events in my brain.  I could not understand them then.  I could not defend myself or my siblings.  Nothing can erase my memory.  I was a tiny six year old when I witnessed her beating my baby brother unmercifully for having a leaky diaper.

I felt sorry for him, hurt for him but, he did something he should not have done.  His loose bowel movement went all over her new rug and she had to clean it up.  She was enraged (again).  We knew better.  We were older.  "Don't make "mother" mad!  Don't upset her! Stay out of her way!"

Sure there were good times.  She would come in late at night after waitressing at the Officer's Club.  She would be loaded with half eaten steaks, crab, shrimp, olives and pastries. Food she savaged from the plates of white officers.  She would dumb pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in a huge bowl.  That was her tip money and sometimes she would give me a quarter.

We never had a baby sitter, just the stern order; "You black a** n***** bed NOT open dat damn do' fah NOBODY! not even you damn granddaddy!"  We were very smart children, extremely dutiful and obedient for six and seven.  Actually we were obedient for any age.  Was it truly obedience or terror?

We watched her beat her husband bloody many times.  She wasn't that big but she was sure strong.  One night she pistol whipped him.  She crashed the butt of that gun over his head over and over trying to crush his thick black skull.  The blood spewed like a broken faucet.  We stood there terrified as a full grown man crumbled to his knees.

A woman determined to strike fear she called the MPs (military police) on him!  She had the nerve to have him arrested.  Then laughed, howled like a rabid wolf.

I know now that I grew up terrified.  I hated being "home" when they were there.  We both did ,so we sought solace in the library.  We found comfort in books.  Of course there were times we could not escape her wrath.  I prayed, got the Holy Ghost. My brother put on three pairs of pants.  Jesus saved me so many times.  My poor brother suffered the brunt of her evil.

You must know that all the while this was going on we never missed a Sunday in church or Sunday school.  She wore the finest clothes in Wesley Chapel A.M.E. Zion church.  She was always on program, always the mistress of ceremony or featured speaker.  I know now that she was nothing but a wolf in sheep's clothing.

I also know that GOD loves her still.  He has forgiven her.  She must repent and forgive herself.  She hates me with a passion, always has.  She is raging with anger because GOD finally revealed her to me.  He took the blinders off.

Is she ashamed of her true self?  Or is it GOD she hates?  Rebellious and corrupt from birth she always had to have her way, terrorize and destroy.

Well you didn't destroy me Mathy!  You made me strong and I thank GOD for you.  "Harden not your heart."  "Turn from your wicked ways and hear from Heaven."

Stay in His WORD children.  Remember; "Apart from Christ we are nothing."

May GOD's Grace, Mercy and Truth engulf you, cloak you and keep you in Perfect Peace,
Rachel Gwendolyn (the exceedingly proud granddaughter of a great Patriarch, JEROME WALTERS)