"Oh ye of little faith"

Most people have absolutely no faith in GOD what so ever.  Of course many,  if not most claim to,  they lie.  People that are "faithless" rely on themselves, their ability to lie and manipulate, to connive and live cunningly, ravenous wolves in sheep's clothing.   Far too many people attend "church" each Sunday trying to win favor with GOD, trading "good religious behavior" for their sins.  That certainly was my mother.

If I am her only child that will admit out loud how absolutely glad I am that she is safely dead, so be it.

Martha did not believe in GOD.  My mother was a pastor that would freely tell me; "Don't pay no 'tention to that shit!  … You can be too fucking religious  … have some common sense."

Martha was so proud of her ability to strike down the innocent.  Martha was great at her craft. (WITCHCRAFT)  Houses burned down, relationships and careers  were destroyed.  So what? She never prospered. And my greatest gift  from my mothers secret demonic treatment is my unshakable faith in the Holy Ghost!

GOD saved me!  Anointed and appointed me!  A little black bastard, a little thrown away baby.

Dear LORD I'm so glad that woman hated me with a secret passion.  What if she had loved me?  Had shown me any real kindness?

Over here, walking by faith. Praise the LORD!

"In all thy getting, get understanding."

I understand I have sever PTSD with delayed expression, and Stockholm syndrome.  I know I am pretty messed up, robbed, ripped off, left pretty much destroyed and destitute by my own mother.  Is it my fault? Not entirely.  The truth is it has taken me my entire life to figure out my mortal enemies, namely my own mother, Martha Jane Walters Hodges Doster Waston Lamoureaux.

Dear LORD please save this world from such predators.  It is so unfair that is why you warned us. You told us we would perish without a preacher.  Very few "Churches" has any real pastors.   We have far too many charismatic snake charmers, greedy pimps performing for the money.

If your pastor is not demanding that you study the Word for yourself, if s/he is not warning against the dangers of WITCHCRAFT,  you should just stay home and keep your money in your pocket.  If your pastor has ever suggested that tithing is the way to Heaven and salvation, keep searching for an honest man or woman of GOD.

One thing I know over two thousand years ago a man named Jesus was kept very busy casting out demons.  Who has been casting them out since (HE) ascended into Heaven?  Very , very few.  Just how many people are actually brave enough to be practicing exorcist?

My mother needed an Exorcist many times over.   I look back shaking my head in horror.  Why did we put up with her?  Jesus said to  shun the very presence of evil.  How could one good family be deceived so long?   Fear!  Jesus said "Fear no man."  Yet, all I remember is fearing her.  It was terrifying fear that would not let me believe the obvious truth.  The woman MURDERED her own father!  Of course she did!

What was my mistake?  Compartmentalizing her.  I divided Martha into good Martha, evil Martha, fun Martha, lying Martha, aloof, uncaring to smothering .  Martha was one very complicated  woman simply because there was  really only one Martha.  Martha the evil "stanking"  raping,  "root working",  lascivious ,  unrepentant whore is the only one that ever existed!  All those other characters, Martha Jane, Mathy Jane, Janie, Martha Jean, Jeanie, Madame Watson, Miss Rico,  were all figments of Martha's sick imagination and delusions.

We the Walters family lost Martha Jane the very first time Martha started practicing WITCHCRAFT.

Why did it take me so long to know my truth? I needed a lot a preparation , a lot of purging, a great deal of study.  No, GOD is not finish with me yet.  (HE) is not near finish with (HIS) Divine Order.

Don't worry children, the evil doer can never win.  Dear pastor of Simon Temple A.M..E. Zion Church , my earnest sincere prayer is that Almighty GOD will release you from the bondage of that woman that deceived all of us for so very long.

I do pray for our restoration, abundant health and wealth. In the mighty name of Jesus I pray.

This is my mother's church, her pastor.  Does he know about her? If he knew what I know, would he tell? Led, guide and strengthen all of us LORD.

"Come ye out from among them."  and Praise the LORD.

"Woke up this morning feeling fine!"

"Man does not do what is right, man does what is convenient ." ; pure wisdom from my grandfather.  Pause a moment and just listen to me brag.  Not only was my grandfather a tall, good looking
"Indian", he was brilliant.  He was a true southern gentlemen.  Fortunately or unfortunately his long life reads like the book of Job.  Born a "colored man" in the rural south not too long after the Institution of Slavery ended legally.

Some how GOD equipped Jerome Walters with the stamina, the integrity, tenacity and wisdom to navigate the treacherous waters of neo-slavery and survive.  Not only did he acquire sixty-five acres of prime farm land, he built  a huge rambling house.  He had barns, orchards, vineyards, storehouses full.  He was a true scholar, a ravenous reader.  He was self educated.

What happened? What went wrong?  Was it the evil daughter his wife gave birth to?  Or did his problems stem from something more pervasive?  If you read 2 Thessalonians you learn that the evil doer Martha had to come here, had to be endured to the end.

My LORD! my heart bleeds for my grandfather.  One cruel deed after another.  Burning and assaulting her toddler brother.  Sexually molesting him.  Bludgeoning a puppy between two bricks.  On and on, how shocked could two parents be?  Martha was never more than heartbreak and vexation of the soul.

There is also something very critical to every one's understanding, there is an explanation for the "negro".  The "negro" is a full fledged imp created during slavery.  The "negro" is greedy, carnal, untrustworthy , common, something hideous and despicable.  The slave master created him and when slavery ended legally in 1865 four million "negroes" were just let loose on society.

Four million pre-hated, unwanted destitute souls forced to survive in world that wanted them dead. A country where the "un-melinated" hate the melinated.  The more melanin  you have the more you are hated.

Common as bat shit, cruel monsters, uncouth, vulgar, loud, intractable, unreachable, unteachable.  That was my mother.  Dear LORD hold what is left of my puny brain together.  Give me the strength to tell my story to a world that could not care less all because my skin is black.

When I say I have known pain I mean I have been forced to endure one long aching pain for sixty-five years all because of my "high yalla" Mother.  While it was the height of my mother's perfect stupidity to demand to be worshipped for the color of her skin and the straightness of her hair, her supporters are worse.

I do pray for my five brothers.  I do pray they will come out of their comas, opened their blinded eyes and see for themselves what their loving mother deliberately did to them.  I know we are all afflicted with Stockholm Syndrome and I was the first to come to consciousness.

All my life I feared and distrusted this "woman".  Did I know she would gladly put me in harms way? Yes.  But did I know it was on purpose?  Did I know Martha Jane Walters was beyond cruel? No!  Why?  She "preached".  Martha preached twenty-four seven.  When she wasn't sinning, fornicating, stealing, stabbing, aborting babies, lying, plotting, shaking her "dust", insulting, gas lighting,  MURDERING, she was spreading the Gospel of the LORD Jesus Christ.

It can't be done.  "Dawthur, you can't serve two masters.   You will love the one and hate the other."

It is all true.  Martha lived to hurt my grandfather.  She bleed him dry financially producing one bastard baby after another.  Martha was always in some "trouble", something that cost other people their money and their happiness.

I did ask GOD why Martha murdered her elderly infirm one legged dying father with a .38 bullet to the heart?  She could have just overdosed him.  He would have died peacefully in his sleep and none of us would have been the wiser.

GOD reminded me, first of all, Martha had no mind of her own.  Every thing she did was dictated by her delusions.  When Martha started her midnight treks to the graveyard seeking graveyard dirt for power it was already over for her.   All the evil Martha ever  did was prompted by her insane jealousy, her out of control Cain spirit.  Martha MURDERED her own father out of jealousy. All the horrible things she did to you secretly , to your brothers, to every member of your family,  were acts motivated by her insane jealousy and greed.  You endured, you survived, you have been made strong.  Go and warn.

The incredible evil that has engulfed America, our world can be stopped with the truth.  There is only One Race, the Human Race.  GOD is The Holy Spirit.  Invite (HIM) into your heart today.

"Come ye out from among them".  Read and study.  Live righteously.  "Love ye one another as I have loved you."

GOD is healing me one cell at a time. Praise the LORD!  A very wicked woman came to this earth and lived the life of a greedy carnal lascivious reprobate for eighty-seven years.  It may take two hundred years of righteous living for the Walters family to recover and catch up to the blessings GOD set out for us but first we must "come ye out from among them."

No more lying.  No more denying.  No more living in shame because my mother volunteered to drag a legion of demons on her back for her entire life.

"Choose ye this day whom thou shall serve."

Study that Book, do what is right.  Be abundantly blessed.

Praise the LORD!

Sadist intend to hurt ...

that is what they do.  Yes, I'm still hurting, not nearly as much though.  I'm so happy.  I can praise GOD.  I can scream with joy without guilt! I am so glad that "woman" is dead.  I put woman in quotation marks because I wanted to say SLUT!  I did say slut because that is what she was, what she wanted to be and wanted me to be a worse one than she was.  Impossible.  Incest! Pedophilia! Witchcraft! Bitch rot!

No such luck you hardened harlot!  I could never be you.  I could never be so common!  Who ever heard of a woman rapist? A mother that rapes her own children, her sons, when they are small toddlers, little children, pre-teens and teenagers? What woman screws her son in-law instead of attending the birth of her grandchild? A demon possessed slut like my mother!  A woman bent on destroying all my manuscripts, art.  A demonic whore bent on attempting to take my life.

A witch! A "Root Worker"! A whore! A prostitute! A lying lazy greedy whore that tried to cover up her filth by false preaching.

"My people perish for lack of knowledge".  Some non-reading "Christian" suggested praying for Mathy when they should have killed her or incarcerated her demonic ass.  This bitch was as fucked up as Legion in the Bible.  If my mother didn't carry a legion of demons,  she didn't carry one.  Whore! Whore! Whore!

Proof, my mother was always such a deeply disturbed ravenous  whore I am totally asexual.  I find the whole idea of sex disgusting.

My beautiful brilliant daughter was just helping me with some very important issues.  I thank GOD for her.  This little girl has done nothing but brought me pure joy since her conception!  I love my daughter.    She is the best thing that every happened to me!  I was sharing how I was surprised that Martha refused to apologize to me and she was eighty-seven years old.  If you can't apologize when you are way past old and you are a "preacher" , something is wrong.

You can't apologize when you are not sorry. You can not apologize if you are glad you did what you did.  Dumb Mathy was glad.  She hurt and lived to hurt.  For what ever reason Martha Jane Walters was a complete sadist.  She loved to hurt people, cause bodily injury and deep psychological pain.  She did that for eighty-seven years!  Now she is gone!

Bow down satan!

Praise the LORD!

Mahalia Jackson - Amazing Grace

Something is very wrong on this earth.  When a woman can play this kind of music every day, all day on Sunday and still be the closet demon my mother was.  Something is wrong!

We were never that dumb.  Were we that fearful? Yes!  The common slut was an ANIMAL!  A sow! A hog! A WHORE!

No matter.  Dear LORD I thank you for my grandfather, my brilliant beautiful daughter.  I thank you for your tender mercies.

Praise the LORD!

I'm so proud of the fact I have a tendency to listen to GOD

It does disturb me when so many claim there is no GOD or when obvious pimps exploit the weak and gullible.  That does not negate the fact GOD is real, (HE) is Supreme, all knowing, all present.  I have no doubt.

While my evil mother and some evil doers have managed to make my life pretty miserable at times I've always won,   always came out better.  It is an unction , a "voice", a knowing, a calling, a drawing.  GOD knows (HIS) own.

I was blessed to be born to one of the most corrupt immoral women that ever lived.  While attractive and charismatic , Martha was despicable.  She was gross, common, nasty, lazy.  Worse she was tolerated, put up with.  Some think they loved her,  some love her still.  Dear LORD have mercy on the feeble minded.

Never! I am so eternally grateful to GOD for saving me, opening my blind eyes, giving me the courage to see that woman I was forced to call "mother" for the horrible human garbage she really always was.

GOD tells us the "whorish woman shall hunt for the precious life."  That is all my silly mother ever did.  I know now she was a stark raving lunatic! Preaching and "Working Roots" ! WITCHCRAFT!
What a fucking idiot!

But this is how good GOD is.  I can go back to every year of my life and see GOD's handiwork, (HIS) leading , (HIS) guiding and protecting from the evil vermin that troll our earth .  Pure parasites, blood suckers, scum of the earth that are so putrid and trifling they can not cast their carnal eyes and lecherous hands outside of their on families.  A "mother" that did what our mother did to us should be shredded .  Her bones should be dug up by dogs and spread all over Cumberland County!

My mother was hilarious, keeping the "cum" towels from her lovers to manipulate them.  My mother had many married lovers, men that could not tell, would not dare reveal her.  Sadly, she did get a lot things, charge cards and charge accounts that she hoarded for herself.  She had no where to wear her fine garments , other than church,  cruises and Casinos.  Martha may have always looked good on the outside but she was pure putrid on the inside.  She knew.  Martha always knew she was nothing more than a lying whore with no substance, no morals what soever.

The saddest fact is, while Martha knew full well she was immoral and despicable, she actually preferred it.  "Oh ye of little faith."

I hurt because my mother always blamed me.  Every man that finally quit her, it was always my fault.  She never explained why but she screamed it  at me for hours. "Yo'duh 'cause of it!  You duh cause of my son forsuking (sic) me!" 

Martha if I had any idea the real reason … I can't say for sure …but I doubt you would have grown to be so old and bitter.

Pride goeth before a fall.  Martha you were always too good, too white, too pretty, to be wrong.  You thought you were too special to be so much as criticized.  I've read studies that blame women like your mother for your severe malignant narcism.

It was you, your pride.  "Pride goeth before a fall."   You were extremely evil and now you're dead.

Praise the LORD!

My hollow victory ...

"What's the use?" was my defeated brother's excuse.  Just far too many years spent ducking and dodging this (secret) slut of a mother's plots and plans to even care now.  We are all old, the night is far spent.  The "stanking"  whore died laughing , swearing she won.  Driving an old second hand Cadillac and preaching to people you don't even like is not winning.  Enslaving two zombies, two men you deliberately emasculated for their check,  is not winning.

Cautiously gas lighting, projecting, manipulating, conniving, conjuring, deceiving and false preaching, is not winning.  Secretly hating with a deep passion certainly is not winning.  Reaching the age of eighty-seven still lying, still vexing is not winning.

"Fuck you bitch!  Why don't you just fucking leave me alone!?  You know damn well I am not the cause of all your misery!  YOU ARE A FUCKING VIPEROUS LOW LIFE IGNORANT VACUOUS WHORE!

Read a book bitch!  Read a book for real you low life cheating whore!  What the fuck did you ever learn from copying off of some one else because you preferred to be laying up under some nigger fornicating than "applying yourself"?

Study!  If you truly want to preach, if you really want to reach souls, you have to surrender your life  first.  Do not demand to lead people where you refuse to go.   Sure you cursed every one out.  Sure we went screaming in the other direction when your evil approached.  Sure you offered us false comfort just so you could slither up on us and do it again.  But, what did you get!?

You didn't get shit you dumb bitch!  As a matter of fact you lost what you had in the first place.  Fuck you!   Fuck you and fuck the horse your rode up on .   Isn't that what you always said to me?   Yes, I was "mealy mouthed", simple, easily fooled.  You are right, I wasn't shit.  I was black as a damn crow and I didn't "have no daddy".  But how did that give you the right to molest and rape me, to molest. beat and rape US?  So, just why should you be able to get away with such?  Because you Preach!  Motherfucker YOU ARE LYING!

 No, I didn't say shit.  No, I was never stupid.  Did I hate you?  I must have for me to still be spewing so much venom against you.

No, I never planned to kill you but I was very disappointed when you divorced your second husband for your third.  I was going to make the News!  There was going to be some blood shed.  I had already warned GOD.  I felt GOD gave me permission.  My pocket knife was razor sharp, already out of the case.  That black motherfucker was  not going to get less than one thousand stabs in his black perverted heart  if he ever fucking approached me again.

You two nigger buzzards are the two luckiest low life fake ass "Christian" nigger buzzards that ever lived.  So I thought.  GOD said no, said you two vermin were too ashamed to die.

Praise the LORD!