"Come Boldly to the throne of Grace!"

Don't be timid! Don't be frightened, come Boldly to His Throne!  Humble yourselves before the LORD imploring Him for His Goodness, for His Truth.

As a mature adult I can tell you from experience there is not one thing this world will give you other than grief.  Please remember the story of Jesus being tempted by the devil after He had fasted for 40 days and nights.  GOD wants us to know that His son was at His weakest when that old serpent came to tempt Him.

Be very careful.  satan has not changed his tactics.  When we are at our weakest, ready to give up, that old serpent slithers up to us with a fool proof plan, with a demonic solution.  The devil will try to convince you that GOD doesn't love you, that you are on your own.  That evil force tries to chip away all your faith, all your trust.  You hurt, you are angry.  In your vulnerable situation it is easy to believe that you are forsaken.

Brothers and sisters you must pray.  You must beseech GOD.  Ask Him for His guidance, His wisdom and His strength.  You must read and study you Bible.  You must go into your secret closet.   Shut this world out, meditate on His WORD.

Yes, it is a very gloomy day here in Georgia.  But, it is a very glorious day in my life!  GOD gave me one more chance to get it right, to trust Him, to let Him lead me.

I am so blessed.  I found ASCA (Adult Children of Child Abuse) and DONM (Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers).  Just when I thought I was going to lose my mind with grief and bewilderment GOD placed these organizations in my life in order for me to understand and heal.

As a survivor of the most heinous reprobate that ever lived I had to question GOD.  I didn't do it disrespectfully, but I did wonder; "Why me? ... Why us?  Why did you let her murder my 84 year old saintly grandfather LORD and let her get away with it?"

GOD told me; "She never got away with any thing.  She knows full well who she is and what she is.   She is a frightened coward.  She is faithless and deceived.  Pray for her."

Jesus told us that we would have mothers against daughters, daughters against mothers, etc.  He told us that wicked ravenous wolves would wrap themselves up in sheep's clothing in order to deceive and mislead the innocent into captivity.  But, He also told us to trust and believe.

My story is one of courage and victory.  I had to wonder why it took me so long to recognize my mother for what she is.  The truth is I just did not want to know.  I was really trying to fix her.  Our roles were always reversed. I took over mothering my brothers when I was five.  Martha got to be a reckless promiscuous pre-teen her whole life.

That's sad.  Eighty-eight years old, still playing pretend.  Still faking and demanding that your whole family submit to you, go along with your schemes and scams.  No one is supposed to notice or mention your 88 years of terror and debauchery.  The horrifying fear you instilled should be sufficient enough to permit you to crawl into your dirty little grave unnoticed, unrecognized.  As a matter of fact, you think your church will honor you and give you a great send-off.

Well, I came to remind you that you are wrong.  Jerome Walters, the man you killed, told you; "Time changes all things."  That crying, having tantrums, pretending that you are weak and can't help yourself is no longer working.  That ignorance with voodoo and conjure got old and it doesn't work.

You are left with one choice Martha; repent of your sins.  Come boldly to the Throne of  Grace!  You can't trade you sick deeds for your outward signs of godliness.  You got into that  awful pit you are rotting in  because of fear and custom.

You were so violent, abusive and ignorant, no one could control or coral you.  Terrorizing people became your pleasure.  Of course you hid behind lies.  Who had the courage to confront you?  Your daddy! So you MURDERED him!

I talked back, defied you, told on you.  So you hated me.  Justified your schemes by inventing horrible untruths on me.  For 88 years you have pretended to be happy.   Pretended that you are winning.  You know full well you are on your way to an eternity in hell.  A savage sick hell.  The same savage sick hell you inflicted upon us, your entire family.

You are guilty of hating the message and the messenger.  GOD is not going to change for you.  GOD is not like your family.  Your family kept your despicable secrets out of  shame.  We were too ashamed to tell the world what kind of woman you really were.  We were proud to ride around in your Cadillacs,  faking, pretending we were somebody, a real family.

Martha, when you were born in 1925 people were taught to keep family secrets for the good of the family name.  I am so glad "time changes all things".  I am so glad I finally heard Jesus say; "Know ye the Truth and the Truth will set you Free!"

Stay in His WORD children.   Remember;"Apart from Christ we are nothing."

May GOD's Grace, Mercy and Truth, engulf you, cloak you and keep you in Perfect Peace,
Rachel Gwendolyn (the exceedingly proud granddaughter of a great Patriarch, JEROME WALTERS)