One nudge away

I don't know why GOD finally took Martha.  Did GOD also finally grow weary?  Did her loud vulgar blaspheming accelerate her "departure"?   Or was "enough is enough"?  I thank GOD for the semi-coma.   I had just enough sense to live, enjoy life, raise a daughter , earn a living, but I genuinely did not know.  I was blind to the fact.  Sure, I knew my mother was ignorant.  She often repeated stupid things that she didn't believe herself.

She did a lot a terrible things to me.  Luckily,  most I didn't know.  Had no idea until some things were revealed to me after her death.  GOD may have taken her because I was "one nudge away" from exploding.  Just "one nudge away" from losing my compete mind.

Be careful when you love to push people around.  satan will never warn you that you finally went too far in your mess.  Your victim finally snapped.  Went ballistic.  Told on everybody!

"My mother, my worse enemy!?" No! I never would have believed it. Never believed it necessary.  What can be worse than being born poor, black and black with black skin (that makes you ten times more repulsive than a light skin-DED black) female, and illegitimate in 1951! ?(Before WIC and child support)    Be Intelligent! Be Beautiful and Talented! You will catch pure hell! You will find out very few people are who they pretend to be or want to be.

Many will tell you  to go to church in search of a spouse.  You might want to re-think that advice.  Where do the buzzards gather?  Around a fresh carcass.  Go to church that is serving the devil's Cool-aide.  You sitting up there with your dumb broke self admiring the Bentley and five thousand dollar gator shoes your pastor is sporting, that simpletons just like you bought him.

Good enough for you!  Going to church in search of someone to fornicate with!  Shame on you.  Jesus said; "No half stepping! Be Hot or Cold!"  Look in the mirror sometime! Get yourself right!  And never marry looking for some help!  Two people looking for and needing financial help will not work.  You will clash, especially if one of them is "no-mannered" , "no manus", as my granddaddy would say.

Somebody fornicating on their partner, making a complete mockery of their "vows".  Men and women should know that very few people will forgive you, will permit such indiscretion.  Real life is not Jerry Springer or Maury.  There are some people that think highly of their temples and your indiscretion will bring them to the conclusion that you are not worthy or worth any continued effort.  You will be dismissed and you will hate the spouse that dismissed you for what you consider to be a tiny indiscretion.

You will hold on to your pride because everyone in your family agrees with you.  Some of your relatives and you included will make disparaging remarks about your spouse's color and age (an age that you aged many years to in order to make your case look better)

Go through your entire life being a selfish intimidating, lying bully and never understand why you can't keep any friends.  Decide early in life that the world owes you something because you are here and you didn't ask to come here.

Never pray!  What is this praying madness anyway?  Just who are you praying to?  Or to whom are you praying?  GOD ain't  never did nothing for you!  There are close to 8 billion people on this planet and you ain't never felt Him.

You stop! You tremble! You feel the Holy Ghost climbing up your spine like an electrical fire.  Before you know it you are screaming; "PRAISE THE LORDPraise the LORDPraisethe LORDpraisethelordpraisethelordpraisethe lordpayduhlawd…."

Pretty soon you are on your knees thanking GOD for keeping you, for making a way.  You don't care what others think. You couldn't care less about what they have to say with their flapping gums and stank breath.  You are holding your head up, refusing to bite your tongue.  You finally know who you are, whom you serve and you have your boots on.  Yes, you can say it. You have your ass kicking boots on and you do intend to kick some well deserving ass!

Tell the Truth! Shame the devil! They should not have picked the wrong side.  When they realized they were on the wrong side, they should have changed.  No matter.  GOD said warn. His children will heed.  Close the Book!

[Excerpt from the The JR WALTERS Chronicles     August 16, 20014  All rights reserved.]