Bad to the bone!"

I came here fierce! I may have been only two or three but I would fight your ass back.  Come to whoop my ass if you wanted to.  I was like the grandma in The Clumps   …."you gon' limp back nigga!"

I am laughing because some people describe my behavior as unnecessarily mean.  I call it protection.  I was eight years old when my grandfather (yes, the saintly one) taught me how to load and fire and .22 rifle.

"Ni, if you haf' to shoot a nigga… shot to kill …don't be playing wid him. If you mean to kill him… kill him!"

Granddaddy went on to tell me; "Baby….don't eva' let no sorry ass nigga bring you down … keep yo'sef up."

I know now and I knew then, that was our "sex, Birds and Bees talk"  for life.  I read between the lines.  (Granddaughter please don't be a whore)

Perhaps to some people , I am not very smart.  To some I'm old, low nigger trash.  I may be all that.  But one thing I know for sure! I am a child of GOD.  GOD loves me, has cared enough to hover over me, protecting me from demons, from vile human beings masquerading as decent people.

Miss satan-nest-ta thought she had me down, just knew that she had won.  Laughed at me for remaining clueless, for being her "permanent down bitch" while she cheated, back stabbed, lied, worked "roots", mostly hated and envied.

She didn't believe or want anyone to love me.  I was an inconvenience .  Something she hated , not for "no reason". satan feed her with a million reasons to forsake me, mutilate, abuse and deprive me. satan gave her the nerve, the audacity to tell me, to tell us; "well fo'git it den!"

"Forget it then! bitch!" I am 63 years old, no fucking idea who my real father is!  Bitch, 'ho, what'eva, that's rachet!. "Ain't no good of no woman being dat  damn common….common as bat shit!  go that way if you want to.
'Scuze the  hell out of me! I don't ever remember sex being that fucking good.  It was a waste of my time and energy.  Didn't get nothing but a dirty p*****.  Sex has to be mental."

I'm getting up.  I could have gotten up and seen this crap many, many years ago.  I don't know why I didn't do this years ago.  Yes I do.  Fear.  Ingrained fear.  I remember the exact day Jesus told me, whispered in my ear; "Fear NO man!"

Praise the LORD!  Be abundantly blessed and healed today children.  If a demon gets in your way, mow them down with GOD's mighty WORD.

Death to all tyrants!  All reapers reap! Reap what you sowed.  Claim every devious scheme you let satan lead you too.  Do what ever you please to me and those that love the LORD.  Jesus will fix it!

[Excerpt from THE JR WALTERS CHRONICLES  September 27, 2014  All rights reserved.]