Mahalia Jackson -- Dig A Little Deeper (VintageMusic.es)

Attending "church" is not enough.  Nor is serving, ushering, pastoring, teaching Sunday school.  At some point you need to check yourself.  Have you ever read the Bible thoroughly? In one setting like you would any other book.  Please do not risk your soul salvation on some pastor, some one with a title,  Bishop, Right Reverend, Apostle, Deacon, Deaconess, etc.  Make sure you know they are HUMAN .  Just fellow human beings subject to the same frailties you are.

Make sure you are not being mislead, warmed up or fired up every Sunday only to be up to your same old shit on Monday.  If your "church" is not moving you towards true salvation you are wasting your time. If you still feel a certain kind of way about people , if you still pre-judge, make assumptions about anyone based on the color of their skin, age, status, wealth, anything you "are not there yet".

I do thank GOD daily for saving me, for rescuing me out of the hands of a pure butcher!  My own MOTHER!  No,  according to satan and her horde I never had a chance.  I didn't.  I was her property, her punching bag, her footstool since my conception.

Like most people I was conceived in sin.  In the back seat of some car no doubt.  I may never know who my "real father" is.  I do not have the money for  a proper DNA so I am left to  merely speculate.  I look at his hands, the shape of his fingers and wonder.  We are both blind.  My nose looks like his.  That is the last thing that whore took from me.  " (blank blank) ain't nun of yo'daddy!) 

Stung again, made a miserable whore's whipping post again.  If (blank blank) is not my daddy why did you swear he was for over fifty years?

My mother was a SOCIOPATH,  a deeply disturbed woman.  An absolute extremely violent brutal tyrant.  A bully, a closet bull-dagger that always got her way by threatening extreme violence, extreme vulgarity, cussing and cursing.   My mother lived eighty-seven years and very few people ever resisted the strangle hold she put upon us for being her kin.  I liken my mother to some kind of vicious black tornado.  "Something evil this way comes."  Endure to the end.  Some evildoers are beyond the reach of GOD. 

We were born into the clutches of the slut and never had a chance.  If anyone ever had a chance to rid himself of her it was my grandfather.  For what ever reason he chose not to.  Like all of us he held onto hope.  We all hoped Mathy Jane would really change one day, would finally become the person she always pretended to be.

No such luck.  Am I mad!? I am infuriated! Every word in that Book is true! The low slut was a witch that deliberately enslaved and destroyed us.  The bitch died laughing! Stanking whore!  I'm mad because my grandfather told me to leave at eighteen, to never come back.  (I did not listen.)  When I was nineteen that woman did something in front of me that left me more mentally impaired than I already was.

I still have nightmares and I'm sixty five! ; " IS THAT YO'MAMA! MY GAAAAAWWWWWWDDDDDD! THAT'S HUR MAMA!" 

We  were in the dayroom of her boyfriend's barracks.  The boyfriend that was in her third husband's company.  A man sixteen years her junior.  We walked in, it was still light outside.  It was early evening. We sat down.  Martha started drinking.  Every one was laughing and talking, listening to music.  The next thing I know there is a huge commotion .  My mother is intwined with a bunch of young men!  The scene is horrid!  Something out of a banned porno flic. The young  men are so ashamed they take her to a nearby room and close the door.

I wanted to die, to melt through the floor, to disappear from the face of this earth forever. It did not happen.  When confronted Martha did what she always did, completely shut down and plotted on me for knowing.

Evil can not win.  I do not care what you do as you journey on this path called life, do repent of your sins before you die.  Do not die arrogantly like Martha pretending she was proud of her abominable life.  Don't do it.  Do not live a life of secretly serving satan and fake preaching.

1. Always think critically. Look out for yourself! Do not honor a woman just because she made you call her mother.
2. Always trust GOD. No matte what, listen to that wee small voice leading and guiding you.
3. Never lie! Never be so terrorized, so beat down and destroyed by demons in this world that you just go along with their lies. 
4. Pray for discernment.  Ask GOD to take your blinders off.  Gird up your loins, man up! 
5. Study GOD's Word.  Make sure you know what a ravenous wolf is.  Make sure you know that some men and women are beyond common.  "From such stay away."
6. Do know everything is in DIVINE ORDER!
7. EVIL CAN NOT WIN!

The saddest fact about becoming a delusional imp like my mother is all her abominable sins against me were totally unnecessary.  The low slut kept me around for something to punish, someone to absorb her guilt.  I stayed around for love.  I craved that maternal love she denied me.

The common sexual acts my mother committed in front of me never passed my lips.  I put it away.  She suffered.  She was the liar, the fake.  She murdered, conjured and joined forces with the evil one.  Why? If she did it to protect her good name, why not live a good life? Why not live the life you claim? 

"Come ye out from among them."