You can be a lot of things...

You can be a lot of things but you can't be your own god.  Well, you can be your own god but, you are doomed to be a poor one. You can be like Don Quixote, fighting windmills until the day you die. You will be just another wasted life thrown on the dung hill.

Yes, it is your choice.  You have the right to be stubbornly stupid.  You may break every one's heart with your obstinacy and "lack of sense".  But, it is your right.

The Bible clearly says; " Fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge."  If GOD can't tell you how to live.  If you have refused to listen low these many years, I know that it is not going to happen.  It can't happen, you have proved that you are unworthy.  You have proved that you are unacceptable.

"Conning" your "loved ones" was not your greatest feat.  "Conning" yourself was.  Ironically you are not completely "conned", thus all the lying and subterfuge.

How dare you demand complete loyalty, our silence, my silence!  You horrible reprobate!  You can't stand yourself that's why you lie so viciously.

Do you hate me because I tell you the truth?  Or do you hate GOD's Truth?  You can't change GOD's truth!  You are a mere piss ant in the eyes of GOD demanding that I revere the likes of you.

You know that you are demonic, DEMONIC by choice.  That's my issue.  That's my weakness.   I failed to realize for far too many years that it was your choice.  My grandfather passed his burden on to me.  Yes, you were his burden.   He told me to always help you.  He told me to love you.

I know now that he did not know the depths of your depravity.  How could he?  You still refuse to believe how sick and depraved you actually are.  You still demand that your futile "parenting" efforts be recognized as grande.

You also know that any good "parenting" you ever did was purely accidental.   You had to put us in school. Luckily we went to very good schools.  A sick devious monster always working your evil and your "roots" you ran out from behind some tree or bush every time we were honored, claiming credit.

You are an animal and I don't like you.  I don't have to like you.  I don't have to have any appreciation for you or anything you ever did that I benefited from.  You have never had any good intentions for me or anyone else.  Everything good that happened to me or for me has been solely the hand of Almighty GOD.  GOD loves me and rescued me from you and the likes of you, despite You!

You knew what you were doing bragging to me how you gave my "black a** away" as a baby.  Your objective was to crush my self-esteem.  It worked.  Because I felt so low I tried to improve myself.  I became a voracious reader. I became a real scholar.  Because you refused to talk to me, to love me I found peace, solace and solitude in my art.

I just want to tell you one thing, you are one dummy!  A dumb idiot that insisted on proving she was more intelligent than the children she ruined with her savage "secret" cruelty.

Well you decided to be your own homemade god.  What a pathetic weak god you are.  You don't control anything, that is why you remain in hiding, "living" in fear.

I am going to tell you one more thing.   Every thing you did to others is going to come back on you. (Psalm 35)   You should have read that Bible instead of faking it.

"The Just shall live by Faith".  Look it up "preacher".

Be richly blessed family.  Work out your own soul salvation with fear and trembling.  Remember; "Apart from Christ you  are nothing."

Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel