There is hurt and there is HURT! There is betrayal and there is BETRAYAL! If you care to know I will tell you about the commonest, cruelest, most sadist stealth sociopath the world has ever known. She is so incredibly depraved that it has taken me sixty years to fully comprehend her sick narcissism.
Whoa you nay sayers. "I wouldn't talk about my mother like that." First of all you are making assumptions and you have never heard of any one human being that is as evil and secretive as she is. Not only is she evil, she is brilliant!
There is no doubt in my mind she is a Demon from Hell!
When I go back and connect all of the sick acts and cruelty I feel like the world's biggest idiot. But I do understand that it is all in divine order. Something that was once a head scratching mystery is now crystal clear.
The fact that my mother was so whorish in 1951 that she didn't know who my father was is very unimportant. A lot of women are 'ho's. That doesn't make them cruel or perverted.
Well this nasty woman and her husband used me as a sex toy, so much so that they rendered me a eunuch. I'll forgive her for that. She is human, she is lustful and she may have been that ignorant.
She dressed in fine clothes and minks while dressing her kids out of thrift shops, she fed us grits and grease, while she came home with her t-bone steak bones and laughed at our plight. Beat us like animals and cussed us like dogs. I forgive her for all of that. It must have been hard to be the mother of five or six children and work for GS-5 wages.
She was always committing some sexually deviant act and we just ignored her. Pretended that it was a one time thing. She is a pioneer freak. I am just talking about what I saw. That was o.k. Too bad she wasn't brave enough to come out of the closet and just be the lesbian she always wanted to be.
She tried to prostitute me at fourteen. He didn't succeed and again I forgave her. She said HE was the pervert, not her. I chose to believe her lie and kept on loving her because she is my mother.
I listened to her tell big lie after bigger lie. I watched her transform herself into Madame Watson and work "roots" and I laughed.
She took me out of ballet when the WHITE lady bragged on me, said I was a natural phenom.
She cussed me out when I asked her if I could take piano lessons.
She threw all of my writing away so that I could not win the Langston Hughes Writing contest.
On and on year after year I had to listen to this woman rant and rave. I watched her work "roots" and tell me how she hated my oldest brother/uncle that she claimed ruined her life. I witnessed her try to pistol whip him in front of his new wife. I watched her trick and lie and laugh.
I let her cuss me out, tell me I wasn't shit!
When she mailed me a letter full of her fecal matter in 1988 I was finally finished with her.
Nine years later in 1997 I returned to the scene of my greatest grief and forgave her. She asked me why and I told her it was at the urging of the Holy Spirit and it was.
Well everything was fine, so I thought. She was preaching and saving souls. I called her every Sunday and sent her all kinds of gifts. Everything was fine. I took care of her after two surgeries. I was there, not my brothers. But the devil would not let her have any happiness. The devil opened her vile mouth again and she started that same crap that she pulled on me when I was a three year old toddler. Her brilliant brain started slipping and she began to tell on herself.
Well I have studied the Bible and it doesn't look good for her. She is a hopeless Demon. I do feel sorry for her. Any woman that would shoot their saintly father in the heart and walk away is an incredible creature. She didn't even blink.
I am the only one that will call her out. That does sadden and disappoint me. She doesn't want to talk to me.
She is in deep denial as she should be. Do not feel sorry for her. Her life is her life. It is the life she created for herself.
Thank you Lord for revealing some of the most painful things to me. I just could not wrap my brain around her and that *Con. I just could not believe that she was still "rooting" people. The Bible says that a dog will return to his vomit and she did.
The lesson here is never to fool with "roots", the occult, none of that.
Don't be stupid, listen to Jesus;"From such stay away."
Thank you Lord for forcing me to accept the horrible truth about her.
Children, do not lean to your own understanding and Trust in GOD with all your heart and if you come in contact` with someone like her learn your lesson quickly and RUN!
How long? Not long.
Study your Bible, embrace the Truth, live right.
Be Blessed. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Tolerated!
To be tolerated is about as good as being dead. When you are tolerated you are to be seen and not heard. You are deemed and idiot before you speak. It is painful but there is no drug for it, no pain killer.
I am fifty-nine years old and tolerated.
'Let her come around but include her out. Say yea,yea repeatedly when she says something. Make sure she gets the sorriest cheapest gifts at Christmas time if you give her anything.'
'Punish her! She should not have been born. She was not planned. Her daddy left me. She is just another black a** nigger! She is nothing. Forget her. Ignore her. No, she is good for something. Use the little black bastard for your sexual pleasure. God doesn't care. If God cared he would not have made her so dark. She is a whimp anyway. She never defends her meely mouth self. Ain't nobody gon believe her no way. I don't know what she trying to get so much education for, little cunt.'
'No she didn't! She is so stupid bragging to me about how she made the highest score on the test. She think she is going to be Fayetteville's first black paralegal. Dat dumb nigga think she gon work with Richie Smith the city attorney. She don't know that I know him. She don't know that I have freaked with him. I can stop that with one little phone call and I did.' (followed by a heidious blood curdling laugh)
'She thought that she was going to get that call to be the first black anchor in Greensboro. She will never get that call. I am so smart I will blame it all on racism. Ha-ha-ha-! They will never catch me, dumb a** niggers.'
'They don't know me I was manufacturing and selling lip reducing cream when I was sixteen years old! I am a genius, no one is smarter than me. And I can act. Brilliant. They will never catch me because they will never suspect me because I am going to put on a robe and climb up in the pulpit and scream and hollar. Dumb a** niggers don't know the difference.'
'Now that I am well past old I will play up my "mental illness". That's right I will just play crazy and my weak a** sons will give me a pass. I don't care nuttin' bout that luddle black cunt. Always running off at the mouth.'
'Lord let me get up from here and go to church. I got to do the morning prayer. I am going to read it because I can't keep this Jesus crap in my head.'
'I can do it! I can do anything I want to do because I always have. I am light bright and damn near white and I am brilliant and charming and you can't catch me. If you catch me in a lie I will blame it on you. As a matter of fact I am going to get you way before you get me. I am going to tell everyone that you are nothing but a drug addict. I am going to whin and sound so pitiful every body is going to love me and hate you.'
'Yea I killed my daddy. The old a** nigger wouldn't die! I got tried of waiting. He was already eighty-four years old. That enough life for anybody! S*** people in his family live all up in their nineties, s*** he had a cousin that lived to be 107! I was sick of that nigga always up in my business, always quoting the Bible. Yea I killed de nigga. Shot him dead through the heart. I couldn't shot him in the head. He was old but he was still pretty. I had a handsome daddy.'
'Well here I am Lord. You know that I am never going to confess. I show ain't gon repent. Let the niggers suffer, serves them right for being so stupid. I still got my "roots" and I am going to "root" all of them until the day I die cause I'm smart and you can't catch me.'
And God said to me "Trust in God with all thine heart and lean not to your own understanding."
To readers of this blog. It is what it is, "Know ye the TRUTH..."
Get a Bible children and study it every day. Search the scripture.
Be Blessed and be a blessing. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much LOve, Peace, and Happiness,
Rachel
I am fifty-nine years old and tolerated.
'Let her come around but include her out. Say yea,yea repeatedly when she says something. Make sure she gets the sorriest cheapest gifts at Christmas time if you give her anything.'
'Punish her! She should not have been born. She was not planned. Her daddy left me. She is just another black a** nigger! She is nothing. Forget her. Ignore her. No, she is good for something. Use the little black bastard for your sexual pleasure. God doesn't care. If God cared he would not have made her so dark. She is a whimp anyway. She never defends her meely mouth self. Ain't nobody gon believe her no way. I don't know what she trying to get so much education for, little cunt.'
'No she didn't! She is so stupid bragging to me about how she made the highest score on the test. She think she is going to be Fayetteville's first black paralegal. Dat dumb nigga think she gon work with Richie Smith the city attorney. She don't know that I know him. She don't know that I have freaked with him. I can stop that with one little phone call and I did.' (followed by a heidious blood curdling laugh)
'She thought that she was going to get that call to be the first black anchor in Greensboro. She will never get that call. I am so smart I will blame it all on racism. Ha-ha-ha-! They will never catch me, dumb a** niggers.'
'They don't know me I was manufacturing and selling lip reducing cream when I was sixteen years old! I am a genius, no one is smarter than me. And I can act. Brilliant. They will never catch me because they will never suspect me because I am going to put on a robe and climb up in the pulpit and scream and hollar. Dumb a** niggers don't know the difference.'
'Now that I am well past old I will play up my "mental illness". That's right I will just play crazy and my weak a** sons will give me a pass. I don't care nuttin' bout that luddle black cunt. Always running off at the mouth.'
'Lord let me get up from here and go to church. I got to do the morning prayer. I am going to read it because I can't keep this Jesus crap in my head.'
'I can do it! I can do anything I want to do because I always have. I am light bright and damn near white and I am brilliant and charming and you can't catch me. If you catch me in a lie I will blame it on you. As a matter of fact I am going to get you way before you get me. I am going to tell everyone that you are nothing but a drug addict. I am going to whin and sound so pitiful every body is going to love me and hate you.'
'Yea I killed my daddy. The old a** nigger wouldn't die! I got tried of waiting. He was already eighty-four years old. That enough life for anybody! S*** people in his family live all up in their nineties, s*** he had a cousin that lived to be 107! I was sick of that nigga always up in my business, always quoting the Bible. Yea I killed de nigga. Shot him dead through the heart. I couldn't shot him in the head. He was old but he was still pretty. I had a handsome daddy.'
'Well here I am Lord. You know that I am never going to confess. I show ain't gon repent. Let the niggers suffer, serves them right for being so stupid. I still got my "roots" and I am going to "root" all of them until the day I die cause I'm smart and you can't catch me.'
And God said to me "Trust in God with all thine heart and lean not to your own understanding."
To readers of this blog. It is what it is, "Know ye the TRUTH..."
Get a Bible children and study it every day. Search the scripture.
Be Blessed and be a blessing. "Hold yourself up much as you can."
Much LOve, Peace, and Happiness,
Rachel
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Lying Lips
"He that hideth hatred with lying lips, and he that uttereth a slander is a fool." Proverbs 10:18
You poor foolish woman. Oozing with sweet syrupy words while lacerating your "loved ones" with foul wicked deeds.
Who did you think you were fooling?
"You put dat f****** bicycle outside! I don't want that s*** in my house!...Don't put it in the f****** storage room either! Nigga! I told you to lay that f****** bicycle up side de house! Hurry up nigga! S*** we got to go! Ain't nobody gon touch your f****** bicycle!"
What could he do? She was his mother, she had authority over him. They had a past. She had beaten him savagely many times in the past! What was the point? You weren't going to win.
There was no help for him. There was no help for us. My elderly grandfather did not dare interfere.
"Ain't nobody gon touch your f****** bycycle!"
We all knew that she was more than disturbed by the purchase of that ten speed Schwinn bicycle. It was the top of the line. My brother was very proud. It was the best present he had ever received in his fourteen years of life. Most of all it was precious because his loving grandfather had purchased it for him.
No one that knew her dared to lodge a protest. So we packed up her Cadillac and drove to Philadelphia to visit my Uncle XXX.
Sure enough, low and behold the bike was mysteriously missing upon our return.
"I didn't know dat XXX. I didn't know deze niggas wuz thieving...I'm sorry" she cooed mournfully.
What could he say, what could he do? The f****** slut struck again!
That's her, that's the notorious Mathy Jane. Slimy, sneaky, sour for no obvious reason.
Born tethered to her we got in line early, we learned the unspoken rules. Don't talk back, to quote her;"Don't you f****** think back nigger!" Don't protest, don't achieve, as a matter of fact become a worse f*** up than she was and you will be loved.
Her favorite children are the ones that get arrested repeatedly, drop out of school and give up on every thing they try.
Be pitiful, be whiny and weak and she'll love you. She will give you some of her ill gotten gain with minimal protest.
You prided yourself as an unstoppable monster. Inflicting pain was your greatest pleasure. Were you chasing that thrill? Were you trying to duplicate that orgasmic pleasure you enjoyed when you smashed that puppy?
It is unreal. How could such a monster be allowed to prey on the innocent for so long?
It's not God's fault. It is our fault for permitting her to violate us repeatedly.
A family of cowards? Perhaps. Maybe we are just ignorant. Or we are too proud, too stiff necked to tell.
"I'd take dat to my grave."; she taught us.
"You don't tell a muthaf****** thang dat go on in dis house!; was her mantra.
What is the truth? My mother, our mother is a Demon. A modern day Demon. Why are you so surprised? We hear about them everyday. Jeffery Dahmer, Charles Manson, Son of Sam, all monsters, all murderers.
All demons are not the same. They take different paths. Some are serial rapists, some become nurses and kill their patients. Some are very cowardly and simply enjoy terrorizing their own families.
They live dual lives. The saintly motherly preacher to the outside world and a cruel sadistic brute at home. Brilliant they do just enough dirt to be feared but slow down on their vicious treachery when they smell rebellion.
A brilliant tactician they keep their allies in check handing out token gifts of small amounts of money and big promises. They butter up and flatter all of their minions while they work feverishly to destroy that rebel, that critical thinker, that talker.
Well I am here to tell you that it will not work. "You shall proceed no further!" Your time is up Devil!
Repent of your sins. Fall prostrate on your knees and beg the Lord for forgiveness. Ask the Lord to come into your heart, to dwell there. Confess, apologize. Jesus is mighty to save. Step into your divine destiny. Claim your blessing. Honor God this day tomorrow may be too late.
Keep reading Proverbs children. Pay close attention to;
"He (She) that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind: and the fool shall be servant to the wise of heart." Proverbs 11:29 "Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
You poor foolish woman. Oozing with sweet syrupy words while lacerating your "loved ones" with foul wicked deeds.
Who did you think you were fooling?
"You put dat f****** bicycle outside! I don't want that s*** in my house!...Don't put it in the f****** storage room either! Nigga! I told you to lay that f****** bicycle up side de house! Hurry up nigga! S*** we got to go! Ain't nobody gon touch your f****** bicycle!"
What could he do? She was his mother, she had authority over him. They had a past. She had beaten him savagely many times in the past! What was the point? You weren't going to win.
There was no help for him. There was no help for us. My elderly grandfather did not dare interfere.
"Ain't nobody gon touch your f****** bycycle!"
We all knew that she was more than disturbed by the purchase of that ten speed Schwinn bicycle. It was the top of the line. My brother was very proud. It was the best present he had ever received in his fourteen years of life. Most of all it was precious because his loving grandfather had purchased it for him.
No one that knew her dared to lodge a protest. So we packed up her Cadillac and drove to Philadelphia to visit my Uncle XXX.
Sure enough, low and behold the bike was mysteriously missing upon our return.
"I didn't know dat XXX. I didn't know deze niggas wuz thieving...I'm sorry" she cooed mournfully.
What could he say, what could he do? The f****** slut struck again!
That's her, that's the notorious Mathy Jane. Slimy, sneaky, sour for no obvious reason.
Born tethered to her we got in line early, we learned the unspoken rules. Don't talk back, to quote her;"Don't you f****** think back nigger!" Don't protest, don't achieve, as a matter of fact become a worse f*** up than she was and you will be loved.
Her favorite children are the ones that get arrested repeatedly, drop out of school and give up on every thing they try.
Be pitiful, be whiny and weak and she'll love you. She will give you some of her ill gotten gain with minimal protest.
You prided yourself as an unstoppable monster. Inflicting pain was your greatest pleasure. Were you chasing that thrill? Were you trying to duplicate that orgasmic pleasure you enjoyed when you smashed that puppy?
It is unreal. How could such a monster be allowed to prey on the innocent for so long?
It's not God's fault. It is our fault for permitting her to violate us repeatedly.
A family of cowards? Perhaps. Maybe we are just ignorant. Or we are too proud, too stiff necked to tell.
"I'd take dat to my grave."; she taught us.
"You don't tell a muthaf****** thang dat go on in dis house!; was her mantra.
What is the truth? My mother, our mother is a Demon. A modern day Demon. Why are you so surprised? We hear about them everyday. Jeffery Dahmer, Charles Manson, Son of Sam, all monsters, all murderers.
All demons are not the same. They take different paths. Some are serial rapists, some become nurses and kill their patients. Some are very cowardly and simply enjoy terrorizing their own families.
They live dual lives. The saintly motherly preacher to the outside world and a cruel sadistic brute at home. Brilliant they do just enough dirt to be feared but slow down on their vicious treachery when they smell rebellion.
A brilliant tactician they keep their allies in check handing out token gifts of small amounts of money and big promises. They butter up and flatter all of their minions while they work feverishly to destroy that rebel, that critical thinker, that talker.
Well I am here to tell you that it will not work. "You shall proceed no further!" Your time is up Devil!
Repent of your sins. Fall prostrate on your knees and beg the Lord for forgiveness. Ask the Lord to come into your heart, to dwell there. Confess, apologize. Jesus is mighty to save. Step into your divine destiny. Claim your blessing. Honor God this day tomorrow may be too late.
Keep reading Proverbs children. Pay close attention to;
"He (She) that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind: and the fool shall be servant to the wise of heart." Proverbs 11:29 "Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Monday, November 22, 2010
The Word Is Common!
As a small child growing up in Wade, North Carolina I learned that "common" was the worst thing you could call a person without actually cursing. "Common" was the word I often overheard concerning that woman. "Here she come wid her common ass." Yes she was very common, poor thing. Lustful, hot as a fire cracker on the 4Th of July. Beautiful and charming, extremely brilliant, unfortunately just common. It was indeed a shame because common wasn't necessary for Mathy Jane. No one could ever make her understand that.
Did she give up on purity when she was raped at eight years old? Did some vile vulgar man turn on some urges reserved for adults? What happens to a child psychologically "ruined"? Who in fact cares? What did they tell her?
"My daddy just ran the nigga off!"
Do you carry resentment against your father for not killing the nigger?
Did you fracture? split? Are you two , three, or a legion of devils?
When did you discover that you had to hide the real you?
Jesus said:"Know ye the truth and the truth shall set you free!"
Didn't you hear that or read that? You heard it, you just could not believe it.
Christ was good but you said ;"God too slow!" So you bolstered him, re-enforced him with "Hoodoo".
Poor Mathy Jane always a hundred years too late.
Did anyone try to tell you that you were going to be alright? Surely someone told you that you were a child of God and that He was going to bless you in His own time in His own way.
God said you would wax worse and worse and you have. The devil has made a complete monkey out of you. And for cheap too. You did all those horrible things for no money. Why would you murder a eighty-four year old man? Because you are common, common and lazy. You killed him for the same reason that you had me washing YOUR baby's shitty diapers when I was five years old. Common.
Common and caught. Still too common and proud to repent.
Shame on you Mathy Jane. You knew better and did wrong anyway because you think you are so smart. Perfect in your guile for so long I can understand why you thought you would never get caught.
Who would believe any thing so vicious and cruel about their own mother?
As a toddler I knew something that a lot of people didn't know. She was very cruel and sneaky. Mean as a snake. Full of hate, raging with envy and jealousy. Blind to boundaries. There was no where she couldn't go, nothing that she couldn't do. You know the kind that will pinch you bloody under your clothes where no one can see. The kind that will steal and destroy ever little gift or compliment delivered by anyone other than her.
I know now that you always felt like shit so you wanted to make sure that I felt like shit. In that you succeeded. I felt like such a sorry pile of shit that I studied my ass off and graduated from college with honors. For sixty years I have been trying to dig myself out of this miry pit that you put me in. After years and years of futile climbing up and slipping back I discover that it is you. You, my own mother , you have been the worse enemy a person could have stalking them. David had Saul and Absalom and I have my own mother.
It is not like God did not warn us. He told us. Look at your Bible people. Jesus was always casting out demons. Demons do live among us and with us. But they shall proceed no further. Your time is up devil. Give it up. If you are able Repent!
Today I feel like Job. There are some days that I am very melancholy. Today is a hard dark day. This is the anniversary of President JFK's assassination, a good man gone too early. A man that believed in justice. Did the devil win? No, because a lot of good came as a result of his sacrifice.
Jesus sacrificed, shed his innocent blood for us. Did the devil win? No, but he wants us to think so.
My heart is very heavy this morning because I am very weary.
An absolute lunatic gave birth to me June 4, 1951 and has done nothing but torture me ever since. She is a Demon from the lowest depths of Hell. For eighty-five years she has lied, looted, robbed, "rooted" and run rough shod over the world. She is a murderer, a soothsayer, a modern day witch and no one believes me. People either don't believe or they don't care.
A sixty-year nightmare is a life of misery. The worse part is that it is so unnecessary.
Did you turn out to be the most stealth Demon the world has ever known because you were raped? I was raped by you and your husband and I didn't turn out like you.
I HATE YOU!!! I pray every day for the Dear Lord to take this excruciating pain and Hatred away. There are days that it subsides. There are actually days that I laugh and feel very good. Then there are days like today and I feel crushed.
I know that is what you like to hear because you are a closet sadist.
It is rather funny. I am starting to understand. You keep all of your delicious pleasures secret. You love having sex with women. I think women are your favorite. You love ruining children, robbing them of their innocence. But why sabotage? Why did you destroy all of my manuscripts? Why have you stalked me for sixty years trying to destroy me?
Did you want to be me? Did you think the world was too good to me? Robbed! You robbed me from conception. My father could not marry you because you were such a notorious whore. Stop telling people that he ran out on his manly responsibilities. You ran out on your womanly responsibilities.
"As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion" (Proverbs 11:22)
What a sad sorry whore you are. Angry because you had to marry a blind man and a little short man black as an ace of spades, you tortured me and others. You held your whole family hostage and committed nothing but one sick act after another. You know better, that's why you hide it so skillfully.
You are a black hearted witch and I hate your guts. Is that what you want me to feel? Do you feel better now? You are a miserable wretch and you want every one to suffer like you have.
There is a small difference. All of your vile decadence has been your choice. You invent reasons to hate people. Hatred is the only emotion you are capable of feeling.
Well you almost won! I hate your deeds. I will not stoop low enough to hate You! I feel sorry for you and continue to pray for you. God took the hatred out of my heart. Now he is working on the pain. I am rising, I am climbing out of this pit that you dug for me.
You should be rotting in jail now for the life you have lived. For some reason God saw fit to spare you from incarceration. But you did not get over ,you did not escape. You have lived in your own prison. A jail built by your own hands. A prison of wicked lies and sick demented cruelty.
Shame on you Mathy Jane. You didn't have to do it but you did it. I am so ashamed of you it makes me tremble.
May the Dear Lord have mercy on your soul!
Young ladies don't go down that road. Don't let any devil from hell make you common. Never do anything that you would be ashamed to admit that you did.
Trust in God with all of your heart and He will bless you. He will lift you up! God is mighty to save if you will just trust Him.
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Did she give up on purity when she was raped at eight years old? Did some vile vulgar man turn on some urges reserved for adults? What happens to a child psychologically "ruined"? Who in fact cares? What did they tell her?
"My daddy just ran the nigga off!"
Do you carry resentment against your father for not killing the nigger?
Did you fracture? split? Are you two , three, or a legion of devils?
When did you discover that you had to hide the real you?
Jesus said:"Know ye the truth and the truth shall set you free!"
Didn't you hear that or read that? You heard it, you just could not believe it.
Christ was good but you said ;"God too slow!" So you bolstered him, re-enforced him with "Hoodoo".
Poor Mathy Jane always a hundred years too late.
Did anyone try to tell you that you were going to be alright? Surely someone told you that you were a child of God and that He was going to bless you in His own time in His own way.
God said you would wax worse and worse and you have. The devil has made a complete monkey out of you. And for cheap too. You did all those horrible things for no money. Why would you murder a eighty-four year old man? Because you are common, common and lazy. You killed him for the same reason that you had me washing YOUR baby's shitty diapers when I was five years old. Common.
Common and caught. Still too common and proud to repent.
Shame on you Mathy Jane. You knew better and did wrong anyway because you think you are so smart. Perfect in your guile for so long I can understand why you thought you would never get caught.
Who would believe any thing so vicious and cruel about their own mother?
As a toddler I knew something that a lot of people didn't know. She was very cruel and sneaky. Mean as a snake. Full of hate, raging with envy and jealousy. Blind to boundaries. There was no where she couldn't go, nothing that she couldn't do. You know the kind that will pinch you bloody under your clothes where no one can see. The kind that will steal and destroy ever little gift or compliment delivered by anyone other than her.
I know now that you always felt like shit so you wanted to make sure that I felt like shit. In that you succeeded. I felt like such a sorry pile of shit that I studied my ass off and graduated from college with honors. For sixty years I have been trying to dig myself out of this miry pit that you put me in. After years and years of futile climbing up and slipping back I discover that it is you. You, my own mother , you have been the worse enemy a person could have stalking them. David had Saul and Absalom and I have my own mother.
It is not like God did not warn us. He told us. Look at your Bible people. Jesus was always casting out demons. Demons do live among us and with us. But they shall proceed no further. Your time is up devil. Give it up. If you are able Repent!
Today I feel like Job. There are some days that I am very melancholy. Today is a hard dark day. This is the anniversary of President JFK's assassination, a good man gone too early. A man that believed in justice. Did the devil win? No, because a lot of good came as a result of his sacrifice.
Jesus sacrificed, shed his innocent blood for us. Did the devil win? No, but he wants us to think so.
My heart is very heavy this morning because I am very weary.
An absolute lunatic gave birth to me June 4, 1951 and has done nothing but torture me ever since. She is a Demon from the lowest depths of Hell. For eighty-five years she has lied, looted, robbed, "rooted" and run rough shod over the world. She is a murderer, a soothsayer, a modern day witch and no one believes me. People either don't believe or they don't care.
A sixty-year nightmare is a life of misery. The worse part is that it is so unnecessary.
Did you turn out to be the most stealth Demon the world has ever known because you were raped? I was raped by you and your husband and I didn't turn out like you.
I HATE YOU!!! I pray every day for the Dear Lord to take this excruciating pain and Hatred away. There are days that it subsides. There are actually days that I laugh and feel very good. Then there are days like today and I feel crushed.
I know that is what you like to hear because you are a closet sadist.
It is rather funny. I am starting to understand. You keep all of your delicious pleasures secret. You love having sex with women. I think women are your favorite. You love ruining children, robbing them of their innocence. But why sabotage? Why did you destroy all of my manuscripts? Why have you stalked me for sixty years trying to destroy me?
Did you want to be me? Did you think the world was too good to me? Robbed! You robbed me from conception. My father could not marry you because you were such a notorious whore. Stop telling people that he ran out on his manly responsibilities. You ran out on your womanly responsibilities.
"As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion" (Proverbs 11:22)
What a sad sorry whore you are. Angry because you had to marry a blind man and a little short man black as an ace of spades, you tortured me and others. You held your whole family hostage and committed nothing but one sick act after another. You know better, that's why you hide it so skillfully.
You are a black hearted witch and I hate your guts. Is that what you want me to feel? Do you feel better now? You are a miserable wretch and you want every one to suffer like you have.
There is a small difference. All of your vile decadence has been your choice. You invent reasons to hate people. Hatred is the only emotion you are capable of feeling.
Well you almost won! I hate your deeds. I will not stoop low enough to hate You! I feel sorry for you and continue to pray for you. God took the hatred out of my heart. Now he is working on the pain. I am rising, I am climbing out of this pit that you dug for me.
You should be rotting in jail now for the life you have lived. For some reason God saw fit to spare you from incarceration. But you did not get over ,you did not escape. You have lived in your own prison. A jail built by your own hands. A prison of wicked lies and sick demented cruelty.
Shame on you Mathy Jane. You didn't have to do it but you did it. I am so ashamed of you it makes me tremble.
May the Dear Lord have mercy on your soul!
Young ladies don't go down that road. Don't let any devil from hell make you common. Never do anything that you would be ashamed to admit that you did.
Trust in God with all of your heart and He will bless you. He will lift you up! God is mighty to save if you will just trust Him.
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Just A Few Things
So, God gave you life. As far as I know we only get one. There is no rewind button. We don't get do-overs but He did give us a Book. Everything we need to know he told us.
Now when God told us to look well to our going he meant it. Live your life ham-scammy if you want to; you will pay. "Strips for the fools back..."
God knew that most people would be scorners, that is why he gave us a mind, free will and ears to hear. Play dumb if you want to, you will suffer.
But I tell you children if you try to live a good Christian life prepare to suffer. The Bible warns us that we are going to suffer. The beauty is that God will help you, He will strengthen your heart, He will enable you and reward you.
Now the Devil will reward you with a few trinkets, swell your head, make you look like a fool then finally forsake you.
But if you have a heart of wisdom you can avoid a lot of heart ache.
There is one Proverb that I want to make sure you understand. To the babes in Christ a proverb is a wise saying, a pearl of wisdom. If you study these Proverbs and bind them upon your heart you will be blessed.
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not to your own understanding." Proverbs 3:3
If you truly trust in the LORD you don't hunt down "root workers" and sorcerers, astrologers, tarot card readers and practitioners of evil magic. You trust in God, you don't try to play God. "...lean not to your own understanding." In other words do not try to put your ignorant spin on God's Word. Do not judge others and try to shape every one's world around your needs and foul pleasures.
You better know that God is large and in charge, YOU CAN'T GET AWAY!
"Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." Exodus 22:18
"A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones; their blood shall be upon them." Leviticus 20:27
Please do not dismiss my tales of "root working" as some superstitious ignorant nonsense. It is real. It is Demonic, but it is real.
I grew up watching my "root working" mother. I learned a lot. I watched her and was amazed. God protected me from the desire to use it.
Yea, I know all about "goofer dust" , "lucky hands" Hoyt's Cologne and Florida Water. God forgave you when you didn't know any better. He forgave you when you practiced it out of ignorance. But, now you will know better because I told you. Be a fool if you want to. I would not go there.
I found this scripture last night and found it intriguing. "Your kerchiefs also will I tear, and deliver my people out of your hand, and they shall be no more in your hand to be hunted; and YE SHALL KNOW THAT I AM THE LORD!" Ezekiel 13:21
Thank You LORD for my Delivery! Thank you for freeing me from that succubus! Thank You for your kind revelation LORD! Thank you for your divine protection. Thank you for your 35Th Psalm. Thank You for Righting Every Wrong!
I am rising. Tell all of my friends and family that I am healing. You do know that I was struck low, cut off at the knees. God finally gave me the strength to acknowledge the most horrible evil the world has ever known. A MOTHER THAT HUNTED ME DOWN AND WORKED ROOTS AGAINST ME FOR SIXTY YEARS! NOT JUST ME, HER ENTIRE FAMILY!!!
How could I know? How could I ever guess someone so vile and cruel was in fact my mother?
She committed sick demonic sins against us time after time. Yet we forgave and forgave. It became a habit to me.
One day the Lord turned the light on. One day He connected all the dots and He said; "You shall PROCEED NO FURTHER!"
Why did you do it MJ? You knew better! Your daddy taught you better! Were you powerless to sin? Did you intend to change? Is that why you became a preacher? Or did you become a preacher to reach more victims? Have you ever had an unction to love the Lord? Why can't you trust Him? Are you ashamed yet?
If you can't trust the Lord I forgive you any way. I do love you but I will have to love you from afar. I do pray for you mightily.
Shame on you MJ for not loving the Lord. Shame on you for letting the Devil take you. Shame on you for putting your trust in the Devil when you have every reason to cry out to the Lord.
Shame on all of us. Shame on us for not picking up our cross. Shame on us for not caring about our fellow man. Shame on us for being selfish and ignorant, stiff necked and rebellious.
Pray children. Pray for our deliverance. Pray for healing. Pray for justice. Pray for mercy.
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Now when God told us to look well to our going he meant it. Live your life ham-scammy if you want to; you will pay. "Strips for the fools back..."
God knew that most people would be scorners, that is why he gave us a mind, free will and ears to hear. Play dumb if you want to, you will suffer.
But I tell you children if you try to live a good Christian life prepare to suffer. The Bible warns us that we are going to suffer. The beauty is that God will help you, He will strengthen your heart, He will enable you and reward you.
Now the Devil will reward you with a few trinkets, swell your head, make you look like a fool then finally forsake you.
But if you have a heart of wisdom you can avoid a lot of heart ache.
There is one Proverb that I want to make sure you understand. To the babes in Christ a proverb is a wise saying, a pearl of wisdom. If you study these Proverbs and bind them upon your heart you will be blessed.
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not to your own understanding." Proverbs 3:3
If you truly trust in the LORD you don't hunt down "root workers" and sorcerers, astrologers, tarot card readers and practitioners of evil magic. You trust in God, you don't try to play God. "...lean not to your own understanding." In other words do not try to put your ignorant spin on God's Word. Do not judge others and try to shape every one's world around your needs and foul pleasures.
You better know that God is large and in charge, YOU CAN'T GET AWAY!
"Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." Exodus 22:18
"A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones; their blood shall be upon them." Leviticus 20:27
Please do not dismiss my tales of "root working" as some superstitious ignorant nonsense. It is real. It is Demonic, but it is real.
I grew up watching my "root working" mother. I learned a lot. I watched her and was amazed. God protected me from the desire to use it.
Yea, I know all about "goofer dust" , "lucky hands" Hoyt's Cologne and Florida Water. God forgave you when you didn't know any better. He forgave you when you practiced it out of ignorance. But, now you will know better because I told you. Be a fool if you want to. I would not go there.
I found this scripture last night and found it intriguing. "Your kerchiefs also will I tear, and deliver my people out of your hand, and they shall be no more in your hand to be hunted; and YE SHALL KNOW THAT I AM THE LORD!" Ezekiel 13:21
Thank You LORD for my Delivery! Thank you for freeing me from that succubus! Thank You for your kind revelation LORD! Thank you for your divine protection. Thank you for your 35Th Psalm. Thank You for Righting Every Wrong!
I am rising. Tell all of my friends and family that I am healing. You do know that I was struck low, cut off at the knees. God finally gave me the strength to acknowledge the most horrible evil the world has ever known. A MOTHER THAT HUNTED ME DOWN AND WORKED ROOTS AGAINST ME FOR SIXTY YEARS! NOT JUST ME, HER ENTIRE FAMILY!!!
How could I know? How could I ever guess someone so vile and cruel was in fact my mother?
She committed sick demonic sins against us time after time. Yet we forgave and forgave. It became a habit to me.
One day the Lord turned the light on. One day He connected all the dots and He said; "You shall PROCEED NO FURTHER!"
Why did you do it MJ? You knew better! Your daddy taught you better! Were you powerless to sin? Did you intend to change? Is that why you became a preacher? Or did you become a preacher to reach more victims? Have you ever had an unction to love the Lord? Why can't you trust Him? Are you ashamed yet?
If you can't trust the Lord I forgive you any way. I do love you but I will have to love you from afar. I do pray for you mightily.
Shame on you MJ for not loving the Lord. Shame on you for letting the Devil take you. Shame on you for putting your trust in the Devil when you have every reason to cry out to the Lord.
Shame on all of us. Shame on us for not picking up our cross. Shame on us for not caring about our fellow man. Shame on us for being selfish and ignorant, stiff necked and rebellious.
Pray children. Pray for our deliverance. Pray for healing. Pray for justice. Pray for mercy.
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
Saturday, November 13, 2010
"Mercy, Peace and Love be multiplied to You." Jude 1:2
What a wonderful magnificent God I serve. I used to go along with everyone else and say "we serve" then one day I finally came to the realization that all people claiming to be Christians are n't. A lot of the people in the Church are just tares sitting up in the Church to misguide God's people. They are selfish exploiters that think only of themselves. They are selfish Jesus pimps, "deceivers being deceived."
It shouldn't and doesn't matter because every man and woman has to work out his or her own salvation. You have to study His Word. You have to pray for Wisdom.
"Trust in the Lord (trust in the LORD! not in Hoodoo or Voodoo, not horoscopes or Tarot card readings. Not what your two faced friend said.) with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding." ( You might be smart compared to ever day man but your brain is like a bb in a boxcar compared to your brain in God's head.)Proverbs 3:3
"Though hand join in hand, the wicked shall not be unpunished: but the seed of the righteous shall be delivered."' Proverbs 11:21
I didn't make it up. It was foretold eons before I was a speck on this planet.
I am just God's messenger. I will tell it! I'm telling it because the Lord told me to tell it!
You must reap what you sow! If you don't like the Truth tell God. But in the mean time do what you can to be saved. That is if you want to be saved.
Wide is the gate that leads to death and destruction, narrow is the path of righteousness. Most people would rather do wrong than do right. If You have a mind to do right you are indeed blessed. You have been set apart. Most people will revile you and mistreat you. They will talk about you and dig pits for you. They hate you for no reason and their greatest desire is to see you destroyed. Pray for them and stay away from them is the best I can tell you. God will take care of them in His own time and in His own way.
Pray without ceasing children.Do not take your precious life for granted. Serve Him out of a Pure heart. No one can see into your heart. Who do we really know? Jesus told me to identify them by their fruit. That is good enough for me. I know enough to not listen to a person I know to be a Demon. I do have that much sense. If I see you root people, saw you root people I know that you are a Demon.
You can just peddle that poison somewhere else. I'm not going to be your chump my whole life. Because I am a caring person I will warn anyone that cares to listen about your proclivities. Let him who hath ears hear.
Your homework is to study the book of Proverbs children.
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
It shouldn't and doesn't matter because every man and woman has to work out his or her own salvation. You have to study His Word. You have to pray for Wisdom.
"Trust in the Lord (trust in the LORD! not in Hoodoo or Voodoo, not horoscopes or Tarot card readings. Not what your two faced friend said.) with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding." ( You might be smart compared to ever day man but your brain is like a bb in a boxcar compared to your brain in God's head.)Proverbs 3:3
"Though hand join in hand, the wicked shall not be unpunished: but the seed of the righteous shall be delivered."' Proverbs 11:21
I didn't make it up. It was foretold eons before I was a speck on this planet.
I am just God's messenger. I will tell it! I'm telling it because the Lord told me to tell it!
You must reap what you sow! If you don't like the Truth tell God. But in the mean time do what you can to be saved. That is if you want to be saved.
Wide is the gate that leads to death and destruction, narrow is the path of righteousness. Most people would rather do wrong than do right. If You have a mind to do right you are indeed blessed. You have been set apart. Most people will revile you and mistreat you. They will talk about you and dig pits for you. They hate you for no reason and their greatest desire is to see you destroyed. Pray for them and stay away from them is the best I can tell you. God will take care of them in His own time and in His own way.
Pray without ceasing children.Do not take your precious life for granted. Serve Him out of a Pure heart. No one can see into your heart. Who do we really know? Jesus told me to identify them by their fruit. That is good enough for me. I know enough to not listen to a person I know to be a Demon. I do have that much sense. If I see you root people, saw you root people I know that you are a Demon.
You can just peddle that poison somewhere else. I'm not going to be your chump my whole life. Because I am a caring person I will warn anyone that cares to listen about your proclivities. Let him who hath ears hear.
Your homework is to study the book of Proverbs children.
Be Blessed. "Keep yourself up much as you can."
Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel
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