As near as I can tell ...

my mother was deeply ashamed of being raped at age eight.  I do think she blamed that rape for her serious nymphomania. I certainly remember many women talking loudly about my mother in Wesley Chapel.  "Common as bat shit!" they said behind her back.  I do remember one woman confronting her, not about her whoredom, but about my mother's snub.  My mother deliberately drove by a fellow member on her way to church.

It was hot as blazes out side.  The lady was very dark skinned and had "milk legs". My mother did not like her and drove past her , profiling in her long Cadillac.  That lady did walk up to my mother and told her; "You are going to have to give in account to GOD for what you did to me."

Always the coward, my mother never responded , just got in her Cadillac pretending to be confused. But I remember how my mother cursed that woman once we were in the car, driving away.  It seems the woman was thought to be too black, too  ugly and too  fat to sit in my mother's fine car.

Color consciousness is not only wrong, it is wicked.  My grandfather used to admonish my mother for her foolishness every day. He also reminded her every day that she was going to hell for practicing witchcraft. She only laughed.

Martha Jane Walters GOD won't let me remain silent concerning your long horrible life.  You went too far and you went too long.

For an ordained minister to brag she wasn't repenting for shit breaks GOD's heart.  Those poor broken men still tethered to the memory of a mother they never had also breaks GOD's heart.  Brothers you must pray, fast, read your Bible study it.  I know she always taught us to "honor your mother" but you must read the rest of that scripture.  GOD tells mothers and fathers  not to provoke their children to wrath  lest they become discouraged.

That was Martha's plan, to vex and torment us in secret  until we gave up, became drug addicted, so broken and destroyed , getting up would never occur to us.  Why? So she could be looked up to, so she could be thought of as someone to truly admire and emulate.

Do know you plan backfired heifer .  "Black heifer" is the name you called me , and worse.  Yes , you started early Martha.   Luckily for me the first four years of my life, my formative years, I was nurtured by my grandfather.  And any of my relatives that choose to honor you,  to cloak for you, to keep you a family secret, an  abomination from the gates of hell,  instead of Jerome Walters, you deserve to suffer.