Far too many people ...

demand to be obeyed, feared,  simply because they are in charge.  Far too many people secretly enact cruel acts against their loved ones, "subordinates" ,  out of jealousy and resentment.  Don't worry.  GOD will keep blinders on us until we are able to handle our truth.

I must have been nineteen,  I did have a fine shape.  It is a fact.  I did have washboard abs and perky breasts. I did have luscious hair.  I was in college.  I was a virgin as far as I knew. I had graduated from high school with honors.  I was a National Merit Scholarship semi-finalist. (I could have been a finalist if I had attempted the math.)

I drove my mother's Cadillac to the "Club", took my high school friend Audrey.   Chit chatting with my mother about the "club",  who was there, how Audrey was doing , I noticed the pants to my beautiful suit were missing, snatched.  It was like a disease with Martha, she would snatch your shit and destroy it.  Don't accuse her.  Martha harbored a demon that you had to wait to die.

For some reason I am laughing, finally solving this never ending mystery.  My mother was the one shoe bandit.  Brag about how much you paid for your shoes, or have a pair of shoes she loved, envied, you would be reduced to one shoe.

What kind of mind is that? "If I can't have it, you damn sure can't have it! You ain't shit! You ruined my life! You are too lucky! Too blessed!  I will fix you, I will ruin you on the sly.  I will preach and no one will know the real me unless some slut like you tells?"

Little did I know , it never occurred to me that my own mother was that jealous of me.  Martha's smile was always pearly white.  Her voice a siren, hypnotizing , intoxicating.  Sadly Martha did believe in her ability to conjure.  She did lean to her own understanding.  She cursed me, wanted me to have nothing. Made sure a big black dick  was slapped in my face by age four! The first year granddaddy trusted her to keep us, to play "mother".

This world doesn't have to tell you, you don't have to have first hand experience with a demon to know they are real, to know they have infiltrated the "church".  You can see!  You can think!

OK,  your pastor has convinced you that tithing is a commandment.  You don't question.  You have itching ears.  S/He tells you it is a sin to curse, to say bad or vulgar words.  The "church" tells you it is a sin to drink.  You sit in church reading about Jesus turning water into wine .  But, you must prove you are a sanctimonious "Christian".  You don't drink! Not only do you refuse to imbibe, you don't want one else to.  You judge.  You sneak off to do your dirt.

The one that does his dirt in the open is deemed too immoral for you.  You slip, you slid.  You cheat on your spouse, you are a closet whore, a closet hater.  Worse, you are a confused closet homosexual.  You are confused about your feelings.  You are terrified.  Your ass is old and you still haven't learned, have failed to catch on.  You live in denial mad that you are now suffering all alone. You claim you are happy.  Well, I'm not!  Nasty common slut!

You still haven't read your Bible for yourself.  You are still gullible, still proud of your "whiteness".  Your Bible tells you to not envy the ways of the oppressor.   You do.  You are full of fear.  Why? You are going to die one day any way.  We all are.  And every day that we live we are all closer to that day of transition.

We don't know where we are  going  or what happens .  It doesn't matter. What matters is what you do now.  Are you living a life that you are proud of?  Or are you attempting to hide your black heart, your deep evil? Are you a "Christian" that changed churches because the "church" was becoming too black?

Do you hate radical Muslims? How can a "Christian" hate?  Do you hate people of color?  Do you think white or like skin is superior? Will you throw a brick and hide your hand?

I can not blame GOD, my grandfather, anyone for the deep evil Martha inflicted on me for all these years. She was always extremely racist, purely hated all people of color, including her stupid ass, whorish ass self.

 I read my Bible, I prayed, I communicated with GOD. (HE) told me to endure to the end, I did.

To GOD be the Glory!