"In due time"

In due time hallelujah , GOD will supply all my needs.  It was in 2005 that my mother terrorized me again, attacking me, accusing me of a plan to betray her.  First of all you must know I didn't have sense enough to know she needed betraying.  I was her slave, her bitch.  I was not just another loyal fan , I was a full fledged flying monkey.

I remember that phone ringing at precisely four o'clock p.m. every day.  I always answered on the third ring.  Heart pounding , frantic and nervous I always approached that phone with dread. "Gwen! Is that house standing tall!?" she demanded.  "Yes MOTHER." I  always answered.

It was never clean.  That four o'clock phone call would catch me elbow deep in dirty  dishes crusted over with dried food.    I always had so many dishes to wash I took to hiding them, throwing them away.

"Eight glasses, eight plates, eight forks and spoons!  That is all the FUCK we need!   I'm hiding the rest of these muthafuckers. You nasty ass black ass muthafuckers never wash a fucking plate!  You sorry niggers don't even take it off of the table!  …Why am I the ONLY one ever cleaning this filthy pigsty up!?"

No, I couldn't see the forrest for my trees.  No one ever told me my "mother" was a raving lunatic because she got raped as a little girl.  No one ever bothered to tell me the hell that low slut put the whole Walters family thorough every muthafucking day she lived FOR EIGHTY-SEVEN MUTHAFUCKING YEARS was foretold!  

Growing up did I think my mother really had demonic power?  Yes!  I had seen it.  While my mother was short, five'  five" , she had big fat fists.  She was as strong as a bull.  People are talking about "bath salts", my "mother" acted like she was on that shit her whole life.  The dumb slut went and collected that demon herself.  Why didn't I know? I was only four, now I know.  A woman that beats the dog shit out of her new husband when caught in fornication should not be left around children.

The man beaten to a bloody pulp was her second husband in two years.  The first old and blind sent her flying.  I assume Mathy  made arrangements for that to never happen again.  The next man got "dusted". Dusted more ways than one.  Not only did she embarrass him, take his manhood, she offered up her little toddler children as bait.  My own mother used me as sexual bait.  It is fine, it backfired.

Her c'church" can still honor her.  So, can her family, her sons, her loved ones.   I won't! Nasty whore! I do believe my mother did blame her severe perversion on my grandfather.  She did! She claimed the man that raped her was his friend, someone he was trying to help during the Depression.  I do know my mother hated my grandfather for failing to kill him.

I know my mother blamed my grandfather for her ending up an unwed mother at sixteen.  Blamed him for running a juke joint.  I know she hated that "boy", claimed he ruined her life.  I know she had some deep ass sick hatred for me.  Having big grown ass men with savage gorilla dicks raping your own toddler children!  No, you could not confess, repent.  No, I understand .  "Get there behind me satan!"

I must admit my "mother" enjoyed being feared, hated, loved, obeyed, worshipped.  The low slut had a god complex.  Not a benevolent god either.  Martha just wanted to smite, to lay low and laugh.  Yes, I hate her  and I am pretty sure I will continue to hate her until I sincerely, diligently, relentlessly pray for GOD to take this burden of hating Martha Jane Walters from me.

The main reason I still hate her  is because I was always clueless as to her demon possession.  Catching her trying to deafen my precious newborn did not wake me up.   I was alarmed, confuse, yet I could not see.  Martha's serious demon possession still had not occurred to me.   I was still as blind as a bat when it came to her deep deceit.

I understand people not understanding.  These people have never read their Bible, not thoroughly.  Most people are just like Martha, "color struck", assigning value to life according to pigmentation and hair texture.  Most people are liars, lying cowards in love with money.  Most people think money is a sign from GOD that you are blessed.  DT is exposing that lie right now.  Why would a person that claims to be a multi billionaire refuse to pay his fair share of taxes?  Greed! Immorality! My mother!  A complete idiot without any boundaries.  YOU CAN'T RAPE BABIES YOU DUMB SLUT!  You can't dismiss what you did as trivial because they are your  black bastards.  Children you had just to collect a check and to enslave.

While my own "mother" did treat me worse that any animal,  I am glad she did.  I would rather be me, than anything like her or anything like the women that love her so much.  I would rather be me than one  of  her silent cloakers.

 How did she do it?  How could a woman be so evil for so long and get away?  Just up and finally die with her victims hollering,  clamoring,  declaring their undying love.  Something must be wrong with me because I hate the bitch! I hate her muthafucking memory!

I'm old, sixty-five trying to love the LORD, trying my best to find salvation, trying to get in the Kingdom while viciously hating so many.  I hate all those damn dumb ass principals  that prevented teaching, deliberated blocked learning.  Took up the books two months before school ended.  Gave out books too late into the quarter.

I hate "faggoty"  ass principals that schedule twenty-two minute lunches and demand you do not permit eating in the room KNOWING FULL FUCKING WELL STUDENTS STAND IN LINE FOR TWENTY FUCKING MINUTES BECAUSE THE FUCKING LUNCH LADIES MOVE LIKE MUTHAFUCKING SNAILS!

Bitch how are you a cafeteria manger running out of wings and fries every time you SERVE THEM! Bitch! Can you count!? How are you going to work at a school and never plan, never anticipate? How many students attend your school? How many love wings? How many should you prepare?

Should I blame your stupidity on your skin color? your gender? Are you just another dick sucker? Did you get that position sucking dick?  I ask because that is exactly how you act?

Dick sucking principals, assistant principals, teachers, department chairs have ruined our schools.  Suck dick or be born white, preferably male.  Fuck you! I won't do it.  I'll be broke.  I will live in a hole in the ground.  My own mother was a piece of shit.  I can pretend she was something great, something to be loved and admired like the rest of my family or I can do what I do, talk about that bitch like a damn dog.

She is not the only one, old nasty 'ho!  Screwing her own sons! "Get thee behind me satan!" Worse! Not only did this low slut treat us like shit, stalked us, died laughing.  Get up out of that grave you low whore and tell the truth! What did you come here for?  To destroy.  Well, I'm not destroyed you stanking whore!  Almost, yes,  almost but, GOD.

Martha, I know so many women like you.  You are worthless.  Whores that pile on make-up, wigs, wear the finest clothes while telling the biggest lies.  Nasty whores that would screw a snake if you held its head.  You are phony!  You don't like yourself.  You shouldn't .  That foul demon spirit is crusing through your body and you want it.  You want and love satan because you don't have enough faith or sense enough to believe in GOD.

What did we do?  We let that low slut have her way.  I won't! I WILL NOT!  I am slowly coming out of my slumber.  Yes, I am mad, pissed to the gills.  I'm not so much mad that she did it,   I'm mad that I took it.  I'm mad because I was such a coward.

"I can fry any muthafuckers mind! I can scramble any nigger's brains!' ; was my "mother's" brag.  Little did I know she was talking about us, about me.  It is a good thing I serve a kind merciful GOD.  Praise the LORD.

"Come ye out from among them."