I have been doing some research

I won two fellowships to graduate schools.  Not one, but two!  I am a research scientist.  In other words I know that I am well qualified to complete the mission that GOD has assigned me.

I am an advocate for children.  I "hate" all child abusers with a passion.  My deep hatred stems from my personal abuse of course.

I know that GOD anointed and appointed me to expose this hidden misery.

This is a serious problem.  It will not go away.  Hiding it makes it worse.  We must change our culture.  We must change our reaction.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention defines "child maltreatment" as abuse and neglect of a child under the age of 18 by a parent, caregiver, or another person in a custodial role (e.g. clergy, coach, teacher)  There are four types of abuse:
- Physical
- Sexual
- Emotional Abuse
- Neglect

( I read that and thought; "Wow! I hit the jackpot1 I suffered from all four.)

According to the CDC disparities exist in terms of gender and "race" for children of abuse. In 2008 African-American children experienced the highest rates of victimization (16.6 per 1,000 children).  Followed by American Indian or Alaska Native (13.9 per 1,000 children).

The CDC readily admits that this is very difficult problem.  These numbers only reflect cases that were identified.  Some one told or some child was hospitalized, treated or in fact murdered.

What about the "silent victims"?  I am forced to wonder about people like me.  What about the millions that never tell?  How many survivors are walking around wounded, destroyed by a selfish mother or father?

I must expose this problem.  Our children have no voice, they have no hope.  I managed to survive.  Should I pretend that I am alright?  Should I simply forgive my abuser and forget it ever happened?

That was my intention.  I squashed it.  I pushed it down.  I forgot it.  I loved my mother any way and you guessed it.  She repaid me with the sickest, vilest betrayal possible.

She is not going to repent.  She is not going to change.  She is no longer important.  She will get her just and honest due one day.

I can not rest knowing that millions of our children suffer needlessly because too many selfish adults are too busy living their fabulous narcissistic lives to care about anyone or anything.

I fully intend to prick the collective conscious of America.  I intend to shame America into caring about all of her children.  All children, regardless of race,class, status, gender or nationality.

Please don't be like so many smug people I've met on my journey.  I am hurt, I am injured.  Most people have reacted to my story with repulsion, revulsion.  Not repulsion for my "tormentor", revulsion for Me!

I am an "outcast" in my own family.  I am chastised for being a "narc", a "snitch".  I don't care!  I will not give up the right for the wrong!

  This clever troll remains "honored", loved, admired, looked up to.  She laughs at me or pretends to.   She sends me "coded" messages, veiled threats, "igger pleeze!".

I know for a fact that I was not her only victim.  Somehow she has convinced her other victims that this is something best kept secret.  "I'd take 'dat to my grave!"

The truth is I probably would have never told.  I would have kept it to myself if she had stopped her abuse. Confident in her "closeted secret abuse" she waxed worse and worse.  (Her many, many sick deeds are documented in my mind. )  I lived with her perfect murder for nine years before I finally got the courage to tell.

What happened?  I caught her working "roots" on me!  She forgot that I did my master's thesis on "Voodoo and Conjure".   I know why she sent me those ceramic chickens.  Chickens are very prominent in "hoodoo", play a very significant role.

The truth is I used to be terrified by her "voodoo".  I grew up watching her.  I saw it with my own eyes.  She can do some things!  Well, she could do some things.  GOD let her "act the fool".  GOD tore the "pillows" from her arms.  She is now rendered weak, tired and "powerless".

Why would anyone rely on, depend on, seek or solicit power from the "evil one" when you can have King Jesus?

The beauty of my story, as foul as it is, as foul as she is, she can still be saved. As long as she has breath in her body she can be saved.

Repentance!?  Is it that hard?  Is GOD's Truth too hard to embrace?

I am mystified by her ignorance and the ignorance of some of my family members.  You can believe in some ignorant superstition, but you can't bend one knee and call on the name of Jesus ?

Have mercy on us all Dear LORD.

Be Richly blessed.  Remember; "Apart from Christ you are nothing."

Much Love, Peace and Happiness,
Rachel