You are just stalling

Yea, you are just stalling, waiting on the grim reaper.

You happy, huh?

Still puffed up with pride, just as ignorant as the day you drew your first breath.

There is stubborn and there is stupid.  You are stupid.  Just as stupid as your blatant cruelty,slimy greed and foul lust are astronomical.  As much as I would like to feel sorry for you (as I used to) I must remind you of "free will".  Not free bludgeon, attack, destroy any and everyone that tries to suggest that you are not indeed perfect.

I does hurt me to tell you this but since this is my blog, my process for healing I am going to go ahead and tell you what I'm really thinking.

Your "commoness", that is your perverted nature is so embarrassing I cry everyday.  Is that why granddaddy cried?

When you murdered your father why didn't you kill yourself?  Why didn't you do the decent thing; a murder-suicide?

Did you think destroying your father's good name would magically elevate your status?  No!  You murdered him for the fun of it.  He was nothing to you.  No one has ever been anything to you but a tool.

You claim that's smart.  You made the decision to become something so low and reprehensible that the full depth of your low character can not be conceived.

You will not ruin my reputation along with yours!  I will not drown in your storm.

You are a vile, rude, crude, demonic, manipulative slut!  You walk in a room and suck all  of the joy out of it.  You claim your inability to recognize boundaries is not your fault.  Rubbish.  You are exactly what you want to be.  Why?  I have no idea.  I remain clueless.

You remain unrepentant, defiant in your debauchery.

My truth; "My mother is an ignorant cunt."  Sure, somewhere deep inside I always played that pretend game with you.

When you see things you shouldn't see, turn your head, play dumb.  Watch this sick sociopath everyday, watch and wonder, watch and scratch your head.  Lie and deny right along with the crazy bitch.

I am still wondering, what did you get bitch?  Eighty-six years of perversion, lying and pretending...and for what?  You successfully destroyed all of your children on the "sly".  What did you prove?  That you were the smartest?  "He may have a medical degree but he a fool!"

While you are lying that lie, why don't you tell the rest of the lie.  Why don't you tell the truth about what you did to him.  Can you dare tell all of that?  Will you dare tell about all of the torture and abuse?  Can you even tell why you did it, other than it just crossed your mind one day?

I know why you did it.  You did it because you are as" common as bat shit",  just like everyone always said.  Pretty can't cover for "common".  There is no man or woman on this earth that will put up with a common CRUEL woman!

Seems your whole life has been stuck in a rut.  You murdered that puppy .  Smashed it's guts out between two bricks.  You are caught in a loop you stupid bitch.  Entice, snare, then bludgeon.   What a life! And then you have the damn "psychotic" nerve to demand to be loved.  "F" you! 'ho!

Get away from me!   Don't you write, don't you call!  No, you ain't got to die, but you got to get the "f" away from me!

I do thank GOD for you.  Without you interfering in my life I may have missed Christ.  GOD knew what I needed and had to go through in order that I might know Christ.

You represent a "season of sorrow" in my life.  That season is over now.  I can move on.  I am moving!  Don't push me ! bitch!   But, I certainly don't  intend to move on without fully exposing you.  No, the world needs to know about you.

You need to know about you.  Comfortable in your "denial" you still want to pretend that you should be designated "mother of year".

Well you keep hedging, keep stalling.   Hoping you can wake up dead and all of this shit will be over, finally.  No, I know,  you ain't "confessin' ta'shit!"    Don't, you are still an abomination.  Stay your course stupid.  You've been wrong, a royal fool, for eighty-six years, why change now?

Lie, die, then rot.

Poor Mathy Jane.  Nobody ever understood her.  Everyone was crazy and jealous of her.  Everyone made her life miserable.  She was a good mother.  She had six living children and at least she changed their diapers.  She is satisfied that she did the best she could.  Why can't you leave it alone?  Why can't you forget it?  Why you always living in the past, "talkin' 'bout some old shit"?

"Don't nobody care!"  "Ain't nobody 'gon believe ya'!"  "You crazy as hell muthaf*****!"  " I don't lie to GAWD! What I'm 'gon to lie to yo black ass fa'?"  "Don't no blackass woman lak no yalla woman!"

"How's my baby? Come gi yo' mama sum suga!"  "She yalla lak yo mama?"

"Blue gum niggas poison-nus!  look at'hur! She got blue gums...see I tole'cha dat nigga posion-nus!"

THE END

Let's get on with the business of healing our nation, our world.  If you can, if you can find it in your heart to do anything to help ease the pain that millions upon millions of people suffer needlessly,  please join me in this fight.

As much as I would like to believe my story is rare, I know it's not.  GOD gave me the courage to tell my story because I asked him for it.

Time to man up.  Stay in His WORD.  Remember, "Apart from Christ you are nothing."

Much Love,Peace and Happiness,
Rachel