Help me LORD! It took me over fifty years to gain the courage to so much as mention my savage rape at her hands and her buzzard husband.
Give me strength LORD! Not only was I savagely raped and severely sexually abused as a child , I was rejected by every one I know when I told! That whore I was forced to call "mother" never let up. Never changed, waxed worse and worse with each passing day for eighty-seven years!
Dear LORD thank you for permitting Martha to trick me out of the State University of New York in Binghampton to attend Atlanta University where I researched voodoo and conjure and discovered my own mother between every page.
Thank you for permitting my mother to stalk me with her voodoo and sick manipulative lies for my entire life. Thank you for her Flying Monkeys that still hate me for her. Thank you for keeping blinders on me so I could not possibly know, could never imagine that my own mother would violate my precious body in search of demonic power. Not one of us, but both of us!
That is the rub, I told and am still telling. That poor boy is hiding , silent, defeated, totally destroyed by his own mother, unable to find the courage to admit his truth. Help him LORD.
I found it Martha. I found your illiterate primitive savage secret. Some practitioners of the Occult believe taking the virginity of small innocent children will ensure them demonic power forever. That was you Martha.
I don't blame you. I would not repent for that shit either. You are better off dying and going to hell. Woman when you fell, YOU FELL! Yes, I can kind of understand your deep secret hatred for me, for granddaddy, for every one not as immoral as you. Yes, I know how your burned, raged, roared every time any one criticized you for your low morals.
But, preaching!? Why? Just what did you think you were doing? I should not ask if you thought you were fooling GOD because you knew you weren't. Was it an attempt to remain close to me, to us? Once we were grown and gone, out of your hair, why wasn't that enough? Why did you have to keep stalking, tricking and lying? Why did you demand to control every one's life never having the ability to control your own?
No, I am going to tell. You have to be made known. I refuse to keep you a secret. Alice Walker was hated for writing the Color Purple by many but, that one book helped to save my life. Later Alice exposed clitoral mutilation. It is a disgusting subject but the fact Alice had enough courage to expose it in writing helped to bring about massive change.
That is what I want. Raped babies, abused babies at the hands of their own mothers, this should not be. No ordained minister should be involved up to her eyeballs in such filth. No preacher should brag she is not repenting. GOD said No!
Yes LORD, let her rot and the racist horde that is just like her. Let them all crowd up in churches pretending to speak in tongue while holding vile racism in their hearts. Let them waste their time and money putting on a show pretending to love you so much while doing absolutely nothing for the innocent children they know full well are being violated.
Dear LORD, thank you for my stripes, my rejection, my crucifixion . Help me to holdup LORD. Hold me in Your arms until my change comes.
In the Mighty Name of Jesus Christ Our LORD I pray.
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