Only the most defeated, destroyed, truly ruined families defend them, cloak for them in death. Only the blindest, deafest, most corrupt coward would still defend Martha Jane. She is finally gone. Good riddance.
Have you ever had company, had some one to come visit and they over stayed their welcome? They became annoying. You missed your freedom.
I do not care who it is, how close someone is too you, there are some things you demand privacy for. Is it me? Am I the only one that craves and worships my alone time? (Jesus did, forty days and forty nights. ) Am I selfish for enjoying my own company?
Was I made this way by my "mother"? She sure influenced me. I learned early that you could not trust adults, that most were nasty. I learned early to steer clear of her perverted husband. The one she claimed she had to marry. The best she could do, the type she was reduced to because she scarified her life, her reputation to have us. We were just worthless black ass bastards that she felt sorry for and could not bear to give us away so she had to marry this pervert and if he ever touched us she was sorry but his worthless black perverted as was the best she could do. And besides he was a soldier in Uncle Sm's Army. He got a fat check every month! A fat check she fully intended to clip him for. And if we were nice and quiet, if we kept our blabbering mouths shut, she might share soon of that booty with us. If there was enough to go around.
Martha had to drive a brand new Cadillac. It could never be over two years old. Martha had to wear the finest clothes. She had to make the bitches envy. (Always calling her a damn whore). She was doing the best she could. Niggers weren't shit! Always getting you pregnant and leaving you with hollering black ass , worth less as, damn black ass, nigger ass children!
Martha always assured us that giving us away would have been worse for us. That she was really nice and she really loved us. And the only reason she was ever mean to us was our fault. We were the ones always doing wrong. We were the needy ass parasites that she did not want and GAWD could ram ups back up Hiz ass!
Of course Martha could not say that out loud too often. Some times her hatred would slip out but mostly she kept it thigh lip with her phony fawning of compliments and brags she did not mean.
We were always the source of Martha's miserable life. She could have done so many things if it had not been for our sorry SIX ASSES! (SIX LAWD! SIX!!!)
(Yea, bitch the same way you loved your daddy the first day of every month. The same way you loved soldiers payday on downtown Person Street or Hay Street. Don't hate me 'cause yo'slutty ass is the whore! Don't hate and try to sabotage me because I had sense enough to learn from your mistakes. Bitch! You were a motivator! If your common loud perverted confused ass would not motivate a person to study, to do better, to break the family curse, nothing would.
You lucky bitch! You lucky I didn't ever kill you or even want to kill you. Yes, I was just as violent, well, capable of the same level of violence. Yes, I did carry a pistol. Yes, I did go for bad. I do thank GOD for preventing me from ever using it.
If you wanted to be "gay", homosexual, bi-sexual, you could have! Personally I really don't think GOD cares about consenting adults. You can't touch children. Don't put your nasty hands on GOD's anointed. You knew better. Trying to destroy me instead of repenting was not the answer. A tiny piss ant spitting into GOD's eye will get DEALT WITH!
While we as six fatherless children hung onto your every word and feared you like Hitler, we were just that, children. What did we know? All we knew , you taught us. Fortunately in your triflingnes, in your total lack of maternal instinct, you let Jerome Walter have us, care for us, nurture us, in our formative years. You could not run that perversion crap on me. Very unlike you I listened to granddaddy, I heeded GOD's Word.
So, you simple imp! You preferred to play crazy and vex us with your secret witchcraft and sadistic acts for eighty-seven years!
No one is that dumb! Too many are that wicked, that fallen, that confused. But no one is that dumb, that idiotic, that intractable. That stubborn, that blind. The gig is up Martha. "You have been weighed in the balances and found wanting."
I remember granddaddy shutting an old sow away from her new piglets. The dumb animal had taken to eating them. Something went wrong. Some times that happens in nature.
Of course granddaddy did not permit the little piglets to be devoured by their turned lunatic mother. Granddaddy could not turn a blind eye on this sow because she was a prize, or because he preferred her or because he didn't want his friends, his family , his neighbors, the world to know, he owned such a hog.
I can not pretend I had a good mother because the world thinks I did. I can not pretend that I did not finally figure Martha Jane Walters out because it took me my entire life. I am not ashamed! I am very proud. Mainly because when I look back over my long life I see JESUS! I can clearly see and rejoice because I know The Holy Spirit made intercession in my life!)
Praise the LORD!
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