Quit pretending!

Stop pretending! Stop lock stepping with the blind masses. I was in the fifth grade, standing at attention reciting the Pledge.  It hit me right then and there. "With LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL!" Where muthafucker!?  Where? When? These same muthafuckers, these same little all white children, along with my white teacher,  treated me like shit on Valentine's Day. (and every day)  My old evil mother had behaved normally for once and bought me a pack of Valentines and candy to stuff every one's Valentine.  I sat up all night neatly addressing each card individually.  The teacher gave us a list of everyone's name.

All the Valentine "mailboxes" were handmade, it was one of our weekly art projects.  Of course mine was lavish , very ornate. The teacher hung them from the bottom of the bulletin board. Some of the "mailboxes" were so stuffed with cards and candy, they fell.

I only got one Valentine and it was from the teacher!  The two other black students in my class didn't give me shit either.

It was understood. "Oh! you're black, you're a NIG-GER!" Well what is the point? I was born black. I can not change my "race".  You do not have the right to inflict pain and shame upon me for an accident of birth.

So you're white? Blonde, blue-eyed .  So?  That doesn't mean you are smarter, more gifted, have greater value as a human being.  That may be the message you send. I do not have to accept it.  My mother never mistreated me because I was too black,  as she said.  That was the best excuse she could come up with to cover her perversion, her immaturity, her selfishness. 

We should not have let her.  We could have stopped her.  All we had to do was kill her.  That was the only way she was ever going to be stopped.

Women like my mother can be identified more readily now that more abuse survivors are exposing them.  

I do like the fact someone has coined the term "dysfunctional " families.  To say our family was dysfunctional is an understatement.  It is all good.  I can still laugh.  I know I'm blessed!

My beautiful brilliant daughter is turning THIRTY-TWO! 

Thank you Jesus!