One thing for sure. Divine Order is real. GOD knew me in the womb and told me what was up. If my mother was too mannish, hard headed, carnal, corrupt, and just plain nasty and too jealous to hear, that is own her. That is clearly her fault. GOD gives us Free Will. Martha thought she was smart enough to be devious, cunning, manipulative and just common., lazy and common.
One thing about it, you would not talk about my mother, you would not tell on her and she was going to do as she pleased. You were going to "let her let until she be taken out." The fact is Martha was extremely sneaky and immoral. I don't know if this happens a lot, according to her she was "normal" and I was the weirdo. For some reason I didn't have those "urges" she told me about.
Martha, sever sexual abuse, starting when a child is still a toddler , will do it for you, make you frigid, asexual. It did it for me. If you thought what you two buzzards did to me was going to make me promiscuous like you, you thought wrong.
Hating me severely, isolating me, leaving in in a room alone for days actually made me crave solitude and independence. I learned to be my own best friend, I became a ravenous reader and I certainly became a great artist.
Thanks to Captain Kangaroo and Mr. Greenjeans and the hundreds of empty shoe boxes you were kind enough to let me have.
And thank you so much for rarely being at home. Thanks for leaving us home alone. You were always ignorant, just like granddaddy said. You claimed every man wanted you, I think it was you , that wanted every man. No, you had no morals, none what so ever. No, you knew neither boundaries or the truth.
But, I never did anything to you, other than try and love you. I think you should have prayed Martha. You should have prayed for the indwelling of The Holy Spirit. If you could not feel GOD, you should not have faked it. And you most certainly should have crucified your flesh.
I don't get it. I don't know what you two did to me, but carnal lust, by passed me. You know I do think you did something to me internally. Of course you did. You smashed that puppy, poured that hot pot of coffee on ***. Burned half of ****** face off!
Somebody should have killed you. You deserved to be murdered. If any whorish woman ever deserved to be murdered by one of her victims, it was you. But, on the contrary , GOD let yo live a very long time. He gave you time and space. You refused to repent. GOD sent that boy back , after "being gone 25 years". Man, no wonder you were such a fool.
"Well, the cat's out of the bag now." No, tears, no party. He was back. You were "preaching". I was the fool, loving on my "mama". You were "rooting", sprinkling your "dust", secretly cheering as I started losing again after nine years of no contact.
The IRS, your favorite tool to punish your secret victims with, ate me up. I lost two brand new cars. every thing I touched turned to dust, again. You were still loving me to my face while still stabbing me in the back.
No, I don't know why you did what you did, but, you did. Divine Order. I guess you hated your daddy because he represented GOD, represented authority. You sure MURDERED him!
No, you weren't crazy. I see you were smart enough to never get caught. I do appreciate what you did because you certainly inadvertently identified your church as a den to thieves, just like you always said. "Dem bishops ain't nutting' but a bunch of damn faggots … eva'last one of um. Greedy dogs."
Do know that I read and studied my Bible for over fifty years. I am sure! I am confident and the best thing about it, I LOVE GOD! I LOVE GOD WITH A PASSION!
What a good GOD we serve! What a mighty GOD we serve!
He got you! He caught you!
PTL!
I press on ...
No comments:
Post a Comment