My life in real time

All in due time was the phrase I often heard instead of "I don't know".  Just turned 64!  Grinning like a Cheshire cat (Chessy cat), GRATEFUL!  When you have more friends and relatives dead than living you take life much more seriously.

I really don't waste a moment.  While I am retired , I am LIVING!  I am an odd recluse.  I love people.  I love to observe them, perhaps interact with some of them on occasion.  This blog is my healing space, where I come to mull over my life in real time.  This is the best medium I have for close study and examination of my "Mathy Jane Experience".

As it turns out Martha Jane Walters was an ABOMINATION STRAIGHT FROM THE BOWELS OF HELL!  I do NOT believe any lower, more common, vicious, lying, manipulative, cunning, conniving, perverted woman has ever lived, EVER!

When I come to myself and realize that SHE KNEW WHO AND WHAT SHE WAS!  This monster did deliberately beat and terrorize her own children from infancy for her repugnant sadistic pleaser.  You don't want to READ IT!

Caring people want me to shut up. I CAN'T!  I am still mystified.  A beautiful intelligent woman that had no need for satan's help or plan, chose it.  A woman blessed with a great loving father like my grandfather DELIBERATELY CHOSE satan OVER GOD IN ORDER TO SHAME HER FATHER!

• Jerome Walters was very "well off" by the standards of his day.  Really, he was well off by the standards of today.  No bills, owned his home, barns, smoke houses, chicken coops and 65 acres of land.
• Jerome Walters was not only tall and handsome, he was "well spoken", quite the eloquent orator
• Jerome Walters was morally upright, a staunch supporter of his church.  Wesley Chapel A.M.E.Zion church.
• Jerome Walters loved his entire FAMILY.  He believed in family.  His favorite question to ask you; "Who yo'peeples  is?"
• Jerome Walters loved ME! PTL!  (Talking about GOD sent, Holy Ghost interference , the Holy Spirit making intercession while we are yet unawares)

I get it.  I finally get it.  MARTHA JANE WALTERS  was truly a "twisted sister". DEMON POSSESSED!  "This evil black hearted heifer been here befo'!"  It is as if Martha was determined to defeat GOD, to turn His WORD into a lie.

If "mother"  could not convince you to go along with her mischief and plots,  psychologically, if she could not manipulate you with her body language, cold stares, silent treatment,  she resorted to vile foul cursing.  If that didn't work and you still didn't let her have her way, you were beaten, brutalized.  Martha was not going to be satisfied until she shed some of YOUR BLOOD!  

For your information, I am NOT re-living it.   I am still trying to understand it, to make some sense of it. MARTHA CHOSE sATAN OVER GOD!  Why?   Was it pride?  She was the phoniest wig wearing, bound up in corsets and girdles suffering-est, lying-est, coveting-est, losing-est, immoral little whore that ever lived.

I will not make the mistake of Martha, reinventing herself,always  seeking approval.  Martha changed names, changed personalities:

• Martha Jean
• Jean
• Janie
• Madam Watson
• Mrs. ____________(who ever she was married to or pretended to be married to at the time) .  Martha had 4 "legal husbands".  We will not count the ones that moved in immediately after one of her husbands was deployed some place.
• Madam Rico
• Reverend Watson
• Mother Watson (As in Mother of the Church)
• Mother, aunt, cousin, etc.

All this changing, name changes, voice, costumes, churches, friends , homes, favorite children.  (Martha played favorites, named each of us a Golden Child based on her needs.)  

I am not a psychiatrist but clearly Martha did not like herself.  Some where she got caught up in comparing, ranking and making adjustments to attract and entice.  Major adjustments she concluded that  she needed,  on her own, based on her "god complex".

I write automatically.  I was around eight when my mother permanently shut me down from talking, form expressing my opinions and observations,  orally.  Martha went on and on for hours; "Why don't you jest SHUT DUH **** UP!   You always TALKIN' YO'MOUF RUN LAK GHOOSE **** BY DUH MOONLIGHT!"

Forbidden to talk, I turned to writing.  "Writing" is my friend. Reading is my salvation.

Perhaps I was very offended, actually crushed when rejected by my family.  Then GOD taught me better.  I do not want to be affiliated with people of low moral character.  If you defend Martha Jane Walters and think that she or her memory should be allowed to rest in peace, you are as immoral as she is!

You count your own grandfather less than a dog.  You know for a fact you would have been one aborted rotting fetus without the interference of Jerome Walters.  You remain mum, stupidly silent, feigning fear!

You are a LIAR!  

Nothing ever upset Martha more than being found out, challenged, criticized.  Being talked about made Martha lose it, 24 hour rages and violent rampages.  We learned to worship her, sit up under her, cooing and going along with future plots.

So, I discovered that there are more than a few love ones that hate me for revealing, exposing,  the likes of Martha Jane.  Hate on!  Prepare to join that lying slut in a burning hell for ETERNITY!

GOD told Noah to warn the world that it was going to rain, he was laughed to scorn.  Frankly, who ever believes a prophet?   Very few.  I am telling you, low, common, nasty, PEDOPHILES  like MARTHA JANE WALTERS are on the increase ASTRONOMICALLY!

Our world is being littered with the bodies of our innocent children while greedy preachers are reaching for the money and not teaching the word.  Apathy and extreme cruelty have taken over.  "My people perish for lack of knowledge" while some want to rush my recovery.

"Get over it already!  Move on! Stifle yourself.  Suffer in silence, we don't want to know.  We will take our chances and if our children get molested we will continue the tradition of 'silence' ".

Hey satan, the thing about treating people like excrement on the bottom of your foot while professing love,  is that when you make a big deal out of withdrawing your phony love, your victim can't tell the difference.

Children, don't give up the right for the wrong.  It is NEVER too late to repent.  Do NOT let foolish pride and a mountain of lies keep you from GOD's Throne of Grace.