I do not know ...

what satan's deal is.  s/he is beyond evil.  "no count", common, nasty, an incestuous pedophile demanding to be kept secret although her dead ass is DEAD!

I know my evil mother was beyond human comprehension.  I endured her for sixty-two years, please do not expect for me to have reasonable  good sense.  I am doing well to not be rubbing **** in my hair.  I am glad to still be among the living.

Dear LORD I know you have a reason for permitting me to experience so much pain and still have a reasonable amount of sanity.

While I pray that no one has a Mathy Jane,  I know far too many do.  Just looking at my own family, my five brothers, I fall into despair.  People keep telling me, "No one cares! No one cares! Get over it, move on!  No one cares, have never cared and never will."

I am sorry, that is a message from the evil one and I will not receive it!  There are good men like Jerome Walters still on this earth.  Perhaps there are only a few.

I know that I am a good person.  I know that GOD has a blessing stored up for me.  I am yet holding on.

My ignorant mother used to taunt me.  It was the common coward in her. It was the self hated in her.  Self hatred she should have had because it was well earned.  She used to brag to me about her parents being married.  "My mama and daddy wuz MARRIED!"  Saying that like it made a difference to GOD or to the world.

My mother called me a black bastard every day of my life.  "Whose fault was that Martha?  I didn't make myself."

World, see where sin and pride will take you.

If you don't know, can't understand me, don't hate me.  Don't lend your hand to stab me in the back.  Don't call me to tell me what an idiot I am.  Please do not remind me of my stupidity.  I assure you I am doing well.  Very few women could have accomplished as much as I have in life with an evil ogre like Mathy Jane stalking you into old age.

"Go sot down satan!"  GOD got me!

I might be black, yes, I'm old, an old grey headed female.  But , I no "mammy".  I am far from being anyone's mammy.

Like I said, Mathy Jane never got away with anything.   If her sons, grandchildren, nieces and nephews don't care that she murdered their grandfather, that is not GOD's fault.

If Simon Temple A.M.E.Zion Church never confesses, never lets on that she fooled them too, that is on them.  It is not GOD's fault.

If Martha ruined you or anyone and you don't know, don't care to know, that is on you.

Jesus told me to know my truth and I would be set free.

PTL!

I press on    ...